Show Stories That a Have Point JUST dUST TAId TALKING TAJ ING HEN Speaker Champ Clark c cf W W. W WHEN Missouri was vas prosecuting attorney attorney at Ht- tone torney of Pike county count an old Id darky came into his of office rice at Louisiana one Olie morning and after bea beating aroun around the brambles for a few minutes brought forth the object of his visit you ou bawn in Mas Ma's Champ he inquired cautiously Su Sure re Uncle Henr Henry Ise had you rou sun sith mon once but the other ma when you ou make dat speech agin Sam Collins and nd sa say dat whisk whisky uz de degreat great greatest st ebil in d de dorl orl v I begins lo hob hab suh hats where I was born g got t to lo rio lowith with it It Uncle Henr Henry Its It's a fact isn't it It- It 1 Ise urse bawn ba in lit suh sult said Uncle Henry with pride au an I ham hain givin of no on dat at but you'd oud please me mo clean down to de suh sun e ef of you'd t tell loll ll me ef of de attorney has gotto sotto sot Jot to swear to his speech er is he jis' jis to de jury Jury New jury New ew York World CAUSE USE FOR FOil PlUG FRIGHT liT P. P AND MRS ASCHE BRE MR Mn NER were touring Europe anti and had just arrived d at Pisa Mrs At chen chen- brenner was all excited upon ra reaching the 1 leaning tower of Pisa Plea and nd early a r pattered up the spiral stairway leaving leaving leav leav- in ing her husband languidly awaiting her return As she weighed a shade over o the two-hundred two mark h het hei r husband al always always always al- al ways dug duE up an e excuse cuse when it G came cameto une to accompanying her on an any altitudes above easy falling distance He was Just pondering oh on the tho be flow of unintelligible language u used ed by their guide when l from the topmost rampart came the lee Hi lo HI trill rm of his wife who was leanIng leanIng leaning lean- lean Ing far out a scar scarf Mr obligingly d dup dup dup up an and then came to life lite with an anguished anguIshed anguished an an- roar Gretchen for your life get et back Youre You're bend bendin in the Ing Harpers Ing Harpers Harper's Magazine le WISE VISE ISE FATHER HE E came down the garden Jarden path pall a aI asad A I i 1 sad sorrowful rig figure lre She watched him with anxious eyes How did father take It 7 she asked sled He Ho took it it well well replied the young oung manOh manOh man Oh Oh Im I'm so glad George she cried pressing pressing- her hands together Are Are you replied George orge Plopping flopping forlornly b by her side Well VeIl I can cant can't t tsay say that I T am am dear At first your o r father fa father father fa- fa ther wouldn't listen wouldn't-listen listen to me Wh Why didn't you OU tell hIm that you OU v i o tu had 1 2500 In the bank as I tol told you ou I to she exclaimed exclaim ell I OIl did a after er all failed tailed else had answered an- an sw d. d George George dejectedly dejected 1 I an-I And what hat did he do then I Do echoed the young oung man titan pa passIng passing pass pass- i H Ing r. r his hand wearily through his hair lIe Ito borrowed It Answers SS S'S B. BAND D. D D Tj u URl i G th the recent visit of President President dent Taft Tart and several governors governor f to the Hu Hutchinson on f fair h the offices officers of lC the the tho Kansas Ma national aal I guard governors governor's staff taff ft appeared in full tull uniform rm Senator Charles Huffman of or Columbus r regimental surgeon among others was togged out In all the gold braid and a and brass butt buttons ns that go do o with witha th tha a regimental uniform On the morning s that Taft Taft arrived ed Huffman went Into a barber shop to get set shaved ved He drew a a. chair hall pr presided over oyer by a rather loquacious barb barber r. r After Aller discussing the weather Ul and the Hie President an and the fair and otter other thIngs the coc conversation began lo to ing nag I Finally the barber t took ol another spurt with his mo mouth th and after alI ad- c Ih g II Huffman's Huffmans uniform and gold braid d and brn bras brasa buttons ns asked sh d How fow fowman man many pieces Ic cs c's in your our hand Kansas City Journal DECI DECEIVED I ED BY LABEL V YOUTH from the country countr who was new to the delights of town lodgings r recently entered d an oil shop and producing a bottle labeled Best e t Unsweetened Gin asked for tor a pint of lamp oil Better take the the label label off ocr in case are sc of if f fn n accidents hadn't I asked the oil oi- oi rna Inn man Dont mattera bit was tho the theres there a only me nie and the cat ever go goto o oto p to the cupboard and I don dont don't t mind n it itI I do d kill the cat cat Killed the cat yet et Z asked the tle oilman oil oil- nan man as the youth was passing next day dayNo ay No I aint said raid the youth with a puzzled look but theres there's a bit of a am m mystery 20 somewhere My 1 landlady has been right queer since last night night- She won wont won't t o open cn her mouth within yards of or orn ofa n a box o 0 match matches s and she he smells something somo- somo th thing ng awful 0 O Los LoK paraffin Los Angeles Angeles An An- Angeles geles Examiner |