OCR Text |
Show Our Children Is only child brighter? By WILLARD ABRAHAM Ph.D. Copley News Service Q. We have an only child, and people lately have been saying something that is quite interesting. I'd like very much to believe that it is true. Are only children really brighter than other children? chil-dren? What does the re- 1 search indicate? j I think our 10-year-old son is quite smart, but is that because he's an only child? I'd certainly appreciate your enlightenment on this subject. A. Only children can be brighter than, as bright as, or slower than other children. chil-dren. Because an only child may have more time, attention at-tention and conversation lavished on him or her, there is probably more of a chance that this youngster will perform closer to capacity ca-pacity than other children do. However, the important factor is in determining the potential for any specific child and bringing him or her as close to performance perform-ance capacity as possible. Although there have been a lot of studies about the capabilities of eldest, youngest and middle, as well as only children, the generalizations about them are far less significant than the importance of concentration concen-tration on the individual child's promise regardless regard-less of position in the family fami-ly or "only child" status. Q. This is a first for me because I really think parents par-ents should solve their own problems and not go for help to a stranger through a newspaper. But you seem to be on the right track with kids and parents, so , let me try one on you. "' I've always heard about strict fathers, but I'm not one of them. Actually I think it's a good idea not to pressure children too much. However, that's not the way my wife feels. She comes down hard on our two children concerning their table manners and how they talk. Even all that wouldn't be so bad, except that she corrects cor-rects them constantly at meal times, even when we have company. The kids are embarrassed, I am too, and it looks to me at those times as though our guests would like to be some-where, some-where, anywhere, else. I think it shows poor manners on ber part. What do you think? A. Meal times should be calm, pleasant times, not when anxiety and indigestion indiges-tion occur. So she may be doing more harm than good, even though she feels she's being a competent parent. We are the model for our children, and it is our responsibility re-sponsibility to guide them, but the right time should be selected. Spoiling the enjoyment that might exist during the only period that many families can get together to-gether seems to be the wrong way to go. Q. I'm worried over the fact that our baby (he's 1 year old) swallowed a penny two weeks ago, and he hasn't "passed" it yet. At least I'm pretty sure he swallowed it because it was on the table when we started eating dinner, and not there when I cleaned op. He hasn't been sick and acts normally, but it still worries me a lot. What would you do if you faced this problem? A. First, I'd really face up to it, and that is why I tried to telephone you, and then wrote to you when I couldn't get your telephone number. What I wanted to suggest is that you get your little boy to your doctor who will no doubt tell you the next step to take. There may be no basis for concern, but a capable professional person located near you is the best one to tell you that, or to share with you what could go wrong and what to do about it. Letters may be sent to Dr. Willard Abraham, Department De-partment of Special Education, Edu-cation, College of Education, Educa-tion, Arizona State University, Univer-sity, Tempe, AZ 85281. Questions of general, interest inter-est will be answered in this column as space permits. Dr. Abraham has written a book about his and his wife's mentally retarded daughter who lived only a few months, titled "You Always Al-ways Lag One Child Behind," Be-hind," $4.95, Sunshine Press, P.O. Box 572, Scotts-dale, Scotts-dale, AZ 85252. |