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Show MuPhillipr I? PLEASE PASS THE BUFFALO!' Buffalo meat is being put on the market in a fairly big way this winter. win-ter. No points are required. The meat is declared sweeter and just as tender as beef. Maybe so, but we find it hard to J work up an appetite for a buffalo, hungry as we are. This may be because be-cause the nearest thing to a buffalo we have ever had around the house was a buffalo robe which came down from Grandpa Gideon. It never looked as if it would taste good. Then, too, wc have a sentimental feeling about buffaloes. They look so nice in those Currier & Ives hunting prints! We never could work ourselves up to eating things out of Currier & Ives prints for fear the chef would get mixed up and cook us up a curry of sleigh or a filet of Central Park bobsledders. But Grandpa Gideon was different. differ-ent. He was a 100 per cent buffalo-steak buffalo-steak man. He preferred it over bear meat, but when hungry he would take a bear. He never cared for restaurant bear. Grandpa Gideon was of pioneer pi-oneer stock. He liked to go into the woods and get his own "b'ar meat." He would put on his leather stockings, stock-ings, his horsehide pants, take a snorter and go right after the critter. crit-ter. He was a sportsman and always threw the small ones back. Grand-pappy Grand-pappy used to grease his arms and face so a bear's punches would slide off. His only weapons were a corncob corn-cob pipe and a bottle. He would go into a cave, light his pipe and keep taking a slug: out of the bottle, ne called this "smoking "smok-ing the b'ar out." He had a code of ethics and would never kill a b'ar in its own home. Once the animal ani-mal had all the smoke it could stand and had started out of the cave, Grandpa would withdraw 10 yards, take his fighting stance and wait. But buffalo was his real dish. There was more zest to- getting one. He would ride- out into the plains and shoot 'em with the bow and arrow, ar-row, scorning the feather or metal lure. If the buffalo were running small he would hunt them from a bicycle. When he was 80 years old he attacked a herd by pogo stick and got three. Grandpa had a great recipe for buffalo meat. It ran: Use half a buffalo. Mince well. Put into a barrel and add 10 pounds of - butter, the whites of 4 dozen eggs, 6 gallons of sour milk and a few slabs of salt pork. Beat with a paddle. Sprinkle with pepper, salt, cinnamon, rock candy and sea sand. Cover with a quart of brandy. Add 1 pound of raisins and a crate of Bermuda onions, diced. Flavor with snuff and a jigger of harness oil. Cook overnight. Leave the house around daybreak and find some place where they serve a good bacon and egg order. Baseball Ruling ("The President said baseball could continue with certain 'Ifs'." . News item.) An "iffy" question baseball Is, With problems rather stiff; Now only players can take part When honestly "4-If." Essential Men Elmer Twitchell thinks ballplayers should find it simple to be classified in the new list of critical industries. He thinks the heavy hitters plainly plain-ly come under the head of "providers "provid-ers of belting" for instance, and also "shellackers." Twirlers will find under the "Petroleum "Pe-troleum Industry" a clause that "producers "pro-ducers of pitches" must be deferred. And why can't catchers and twirlers both come under the exemption granted to "those making batteries." Umpires are clearly deferred, he says, as "gatherer's of gums and barks" as well as "men engaged in pest control." Barefaced Bribery "WANTED Housekeeper; apartment, apart-ment, Locust Valley; one child; live in or out; salary includes package of cigarettes daily. Glen Cove 271- R." Port Washington News. ' The line forms on the right! Sign for a flesh reduction establishment: estab-lishment: Come in for a Battle of the Bulges." Conventions are going to be curbed. Business is going from badge to worse. Ain't It So? Little children 'round the feet Serve as mirrors hard to beat. Mainers, morals, children detect But It's faults, children reflect. Little children 'round the house Make a man out of a louse. Sade Talbert, |