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Show In theatrical jargon, a "Butter and Egg Man" is a filthy rich American tycoon; who through chicanery or blackmail, is forced to put up large sums of money to support a stage production that has all the earmarks of becoming a stinker. Whether willingly or reluctantly, reluctant-ly, the United States Department of Agriculture has now become the 1 biggest Butter and Egg man of all time. Bludgeoned with the threat of losing the farmer vote, and bedeviled with ever-increasing I farm surpluses; the poor bureau crats are stuck with a farce, that becomes more expensive and overwhelming over-whelming day by day. Although the products involved are legion, butter will serve as a good example of the problem the and still have none of it in their ice boxes. If they still have a yearn to spread some of it on bread, it is available of course at around 80 cents a pound. Two vexing problems now confront con-front the Agriculture Department. How to get rid of the gigantic supply now on hand; and how to get the money to buy the thousands thous-ands of pounds American cows are producing daily. One bureau- I crat came up with an idea that is a corker. He proposed selling the storage butter to creameries for 30 cents a pound. The creameries would then mix the aged product with fresh butter; and retail the mixture to housewives for 50 cents. This seems like a pretty sure j way for the dairymen to lose the few customers they still have; but department has on its hands. Many people don't eat butter. They used . to like the stuff; but the way things are now, they just can't afford to buy it and eat it too. This is how it -works. People pay taxes to support the price of grain, which the farmer must buy at the pegged prices to feed his cows. They pay again, so the government govern-ment can buy butter from the farmer, in order to create an artificial ar-tificial scarcity, and thus keep up the price. The third diwy comes when the government builds, buys, rents and maintains refrigerated warehouses to keep the golden spread from becoming rancid. Thus the consumers have paid three installments on the butter the boys must be given credit for trying. Secretary of Agriculture Ezra Taft Benson, an honest and conscientious con-scientious man, is struggling valiantly val-iantly to bring some semblance of order out of the chaos he inherited from his predecessors. The other day he reportedly made this striking strik-ing remark, "We may fully expect ex-pect soon, that the urban population popu-lation of America will rise up and demand an end to the farm support sup-port program. " In the parlance of the theatre again, "If you have paid three times for a ticket, and still think the show is a mess; you might ask for your money back." So long 'til Friday. |
