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Show An Acid Test for Those Addicted to Bobbie Burns. PORTOBELLO. ON A bus plying between Edinburgh and Pitlochry I sat next to a charming old cove who advised me whilst still in the city limits of the first named municipality that he was a former resident of New Jersey and now a gentleman of the world roaming willy-nilly. He proved to be well informed about Scotland and was otherwise so agreeable that I was prevailed upon to accompany accom-pany him the next day to Porto-bello, Porto-bello, a seaside resort where the poet Burns spent a good part of his time at a certain domicile which mv friend proposed to visit. "I am told," said he, "that the greatest living interpreter of Burns now occupies the house. When it comes to translating Burns into understandable un-derstandable terms I flatter myself. "That'll do," said I. "Come along and take your medicine." It was no trouble at all to locate the Burns expert. In fact, he was waiting for some nut to drop in and start shooting. No time was lost getting down to brass tacks. The first crack out of the box the Portobello man hauled forth his "Complete Burns," turned to "O Lay Thy Loof in Mine, Lass," and pointed to four lines: A Blave to Love's unbounded sway, He oft has brought me meikle wea; (1) But now he Is my deadly fae, (2) Unless thou be my ain. The Jerseyite swallowed his Adam's Ad-am's apple and turned to me for sympathy, none of which I had on hand at the moment. "Ond what do ye think o' this, mon?" Gie me a canny hour at e'en My arms about me dearie, O, An' war'ly cares, an' war'ly men, May a' gae tapsalteerie, O. (3) "Frae 'Green Grow the Rashes,' that one. Ond this 'Address to the Toothake.' Certainly thot'll not tax yer intelligence": My curse upon your venom'd stang That shoots my tortur'd gums alang; And thri' my lugs gi'es mony a twang, Wi' gnawing vengeance; Tearing my nerves wi' bitter pang, Like wracking engines. Nothing the matter with that, thought I, without saying so. But the next one, from "The Jolly Beggars," Beg-gars," was a corker. Ae nipht at e'en a merry core O' randie, ganfjrel (4) bodies. In PooKie-Nansie'3 held the splore. (5) To drink their orra-duddies. (6) Never more depressed a man than my Jersey pal. Again I gave him the cold, unsympathetic eye. Burns interpreter, my hat. The merciless rortohellonlan went on from the "Picture of Miss r m . 1JU1113 ; Clap In his walle-nieve (7) a blade He'll make It whissle. An' less, an' arms, an' heades will sneed (8) Like taps o' thrissle. (9) The New Jersey tourist now registered reg-istered complete chaos. I doubt if the next quotation from "Oreen Grow the Rushes" was even heard by him : The tapetless, ramfeezl'd hlzzie. (10) At this point I Interposed with the suggestion that the Portobello seer road something understandable. Turning to the "Braw Wooer," he read with fine elocutionary grace: But pleasure are like poppies spread You seize the flow'r, Its bloom is shed ; Or like the snow falls In the river A moment white then melts forever; for-ever; Or like the Eorealls race, That flit ere you can point their place; Or like the Rainbow's lovely form Envanishlni; amid the storm. The key to the above: s 1 A ble, great way 2 Foe. 3 Heedless, fooll.sh. I Scolding, wandering porson 6 Noise, riot. 6 Old clothes. 7 Ample list. 8 To cut o(T. 9 Thlstlo. 10 Heedless, fatigued, wild young girl. There Is one case of a Burns fan who cllered n prize of e English pound to the 1. inn who could tnins-1,1,0 tnins-1,1,0 tIl(! I""" ling of Burns' tricks The rush of contestants, something tieyond the prize ( ,--s .x ,,,.,. dons, cooled ,s nnl.ir, resullln- In ll'o proposal that while he was per-foclly per-foclly willing , ,U1 )mli(i (() nnch enlry who was 100 ,,r (Trlt l'rlf.-t. he would expect all those ;vh,. rmi.Ni to coU! u,,,,,,,.,, u,1( two pounds. "Ye caniia' expect n moil to on- ;' '"I" a lim-anhms experiment" h" Sal'1' "w1'""1 '" gu.'iniiilee o' ""' ,'v''1" '''li.isi.ls. Us lair ivillculuiis." Copi i l,;l,i. u Nil Norvlco. |