Show ott about M this business ot of golf OAKLAND AKLAND CALIF As I 1 site sit writing this I 1 look out where elderly gentlemen ini in i tent on relaxing may be meeril seen tensing themselves up tighter than a cocked wolf trap an and then staggering toward the di clubhouse with every nerve I 1 I 1 standing on end and screaming scream in ingi g I 1 for help and highballs high balls I 1 smile at them tori fori am one who a has given up golf you might eveni go so far as to say golf gave me up I 1 tried and tried but I 1 never broke a typhoid patients patient s temperature pera ture chart never got below I 1 spent so much time climbing into sand and traps and out again that people began 1 thinking I 1 was a new kind of hermit living by pret irvin S cobb i arence in bunkers the old man of the link beds be calling me next and I 1 used to slice so far into the rough that looking tor for my ball I 1 penetrated jungles where the foot of man trod since the early mound builders how I 1 addi ed many rare specimens to my col lection of indian relics but the last straw was when a scotch professional after morbidly I 1 watching my form told me that at any rate there was one thing about me which was correct I 1 did have on golf stockings i Congress congressional imal boldness W 7 ARNING to pet lovers if you own guinea pigs or tame rab bits or trained seals or suchlike such like gen tle tie creatures try to keep the word ii from them that some of the majority members of the lower branch of con gross actually threatened to defy r their masters voice the senate always has been i known as the worlds greatest deliberative body and week by week j and month by month dont those elder statesmen know how to delab erate I 1 but these last few years the fl house haS earned the deputa reputation lion pf af being afie ma most st docile legislative if f outfit since aesoph king stork ruled 5 over the synod of the frogs so should the news ever spread a mong among the lesser creatures hitherto so placid and biddable that an 4 example had been set at washington theres no telling when the belgian hares will start rampaging and the singing mice ace will begin acting 3 up tip rough and the grub worms will gang against the big old woodpecker professional orators W 7 E HAVE in southern califor calif ori nia a professional orator who y long ago discovered that the most dulcet music on earth was the sound i i of his own voice hell speak any where at the drop of the hat and provide the hat worse this coast defender of ours labors under the delusion that if he shouts at the top of his voice his eloquence will be all the more forceful the only way to avoid meeting him at dinner is to eat at an owl wagon but the other night at an important banquet he strangely was missing from the ar ray of speakers at the head table one guest turned in amazement to f his neighbor wheres blank he inquired naming the absentee you hear answered the i other he busted a couple of ear drums whose said the first fellow lu 0 0 foes of Naz idom T T HE veteran rabbi stephen wise wisa of new york has been reason ably outspoken in his views on nazi treatment of his own co religionists a and the practitioners of other faiths as well and one of the most ven s erable prelates pr elates of the catholic catholia church in europe while discussing the same subject exactly pulled his punches either v so what A friend just back from I 1 abroad tells me that in berlin he bet heard a high government officer fiercely denounce these two distin Y men about the mildest thing the speaker said about them was that both were senile some how or other the speech gasn wasn t printed in the german pa papers P ers i maybe by orders from on hia high well far be it from this inno ihrl i cent bastan bystander der to get into religious 1 arguments and besides I 1 have no firsthand first hand knowledge as to the chris t tian clergy mans state of health al ai I 1 I 1 though judging by his utterances theres nothing particularly wrong wron with his mind but I 1 do know rab b bi i wise and if hes in his h dotage lo tage temple and I 1 risk so S 0 is shirley shirle the assertion that he would be per t factly willing to have one foot in w the 1 l grave it if he could have the other on herr hillers Hit lers neck IRVIN S B 0 service 7 |