Show editorial brevities Brevi ties REMEMBER REINIE NIBER the good old flays days when you could measure a mans importance in the community by the amount of gilt he had bad on its his private shoving shaving mug at the domn ton a barbershop 01 WHAT a happy world this would mould b be for europe it it could only induce uncle sam am to say ill pay tor for everything 0 o 0 OUR OCR idea of not being important at a national contention Is to act as an alternate W 1001 WHEN tile the two big conventions contentions are 0 ver over chicagoans will have hare enough discarded planks to build several places for the coming worlds fair 41 40 WITH cincinnati and boston both oc cupping the big league cellar positions things be begin in to look normal again 4 40 40 WHO remembers the good old flays days when 11 hen oil was only something you took from a tablespoon and the only time gasoline figured any in the newspapers lias isas when ichen some misinformed cook tried to start a fire with it 40 aw SOME of these days the russians and japs are going to get together and it wont be to play bridge el either ther 10 V W ONE thing which Is apt to spoil tile the good time of 0 the wets at the coming democratic national convention Is the thought of senator walsh of montana as permanent chairman 0 1 ONE of our much married friends says that no photograph of his wife would be a good likeness unless it were a talking picture ALREADY the tree free traders are beginning to blame the revolution in chile on to the copper tax ta in the new resenie bill but up to this time they have been unable to figure out what valant tariff schedule caused the grasshopper plague in nebraska W 4 SOMEBODY said in tile the senate the other day that it if it were not tor for the radio advertising we mould nt have as good radio programs as we do oh well RAMSAY MACDONALD wants mants to expand the reparations conference to be held at lausanne into a world trade parley why parley over world trade when hen there aint any NO DOUBT mayor walker would be willing to give judge seabury a glowing recommendation tor for the appointment ot of united states slates minister to zanzibar 0 THE WETS seem to be able to make just as much noise as they did in the old with 40 0 CHEER UP fifteen years ago we had aawar a war to end war and now ma mabe be we are having a depression to end depressions WHY the senate investigate tho those dakota grago grasshoppers hoppers to see whether they are mor working kling in conjunction with the chicago board of 0 trade to manipulate grain prices i 0 SOMEBODY Is asking for a coal corn com mission to help the ibe coal ail industry mey see what happened when the farm hoard board started out to help the farmer farmere 4 40 THE japanese are sold said to be costing casting longing eyes on that siberian railroad II 11 tell ell it if they will mill come over oter here with some real money they can buy all the railroads t they ley want mant at bargain prices aw w 1111 ONE GOOD result of the depression Is that more people are preferring to read the bible rather than the high pressure vacation literature I 1 W W 49 IT IS said that less water mater Is being aged bcd in new york than formerly on account of the depression we should have hare thought that the depression would cause new yorkers to take more witter water 40 ONE of 0 our friends who mho went to a burlesque show the other night tells us that tile the chorus girls wear just as much now as they did when times were mere prosperous w 40 reduction and harmony PAUL WHITEMAN Wll ITEMAN ha has reduced ioe pound tand or so and nn an observer reports the discovery of two hitherto unknown saxophone players in tile the orchestra nashville banner 4 hurled burled civilization THE OLDEST town toun so far found by man has been unearthed hidden beneath a heavy covering to taxes columbus oil ohio to state journal 41 41 misnamed think a horse borse with a name like economic which finished second in the ke kentucky ra tucky derby would have saved enough early speed to win uin klamt dally daily ne news a 4 1110 0 01 THE BATHING suits are scantier look ing than ever this year but it on account of the depression aw aw 0 pork barrel post offices IF THE garner public works bill passes it would mean new post offices or repairs to post office buildings now up none of which are badly needed post office buildings pay nay so BO taxes and I 1 they do not even pay tor for street paving they are not revenue producing con c on corns cerns and once built they represent dead c capital president hoover denounced the scheme as one of the worst pork barrel and log rolling holdups ever planned it Is high time that congress le learns the difference between what helps ur unemployment and what benefits politicians only pueblo colo indicator W II if cement I 1 is riot not obtainable and there are mouse moue holes hole to be topped stopped try this soak newspapers newspaper in a trong strong solution of hot water and 1 I 1 soda mua maidi or squeeze to a pulp and fill the hole |