Show V SM smiles THERE WAS A FIRE so the entry clerk was discharged for persistently using cigarettes yes I 1 told him that where there was so eo much smoke be a tire fire know him iles hes an old alma jay say may go too when nhen you hear him me and you limited vocabulary Dub walte waite seems to be it a plain ken man still I 1 like to see a person exercise some judgment in the use of adjectives yes it gets monotonous af after ter it while when he refers to everything he likes as great and everything he dislikes as an punk his attitude tf 46 what Is your atil attitude tude toward canned music that depends on where I 1 happen to be rep replied lied the tactful man yes it I 1 am visiting people 1 I dont know very well and canned music Is provided I 1 simulate enjoyment but if I 1 happen to be among intimate friends I 1 let my features expressly express my true feelings something wrong i haskitt you say marriage was the result of love at first might bight enoltt yes haskitt well that accounts for far it boitt accounts for what f haskitt his asking me for the the address of a reliable oculist this morning A the real thing my idea of a wise man sald the youth who imagines he knows things to ls one who knows when to stop talking i A man who possesses the genuine brand of wisdom rejoined the shel byville sage Is one who knows when I 1 not to begin worth remembering the american eagle Is bald I 1 understand der stand said the foreign visitor quite so replied the military p patriot but contrary to the belief of some people that Is his natural state the covering of his head was not abt snatched off by hostile hands after he reached the age of maturity well informed this tourist has an important air yes hes been around the world nine times indeed I 1 ile he roust must know a great deal about foreign countries name any capital in europe and he can tell you the best restaurant there FROM BEANTOWN yep yen I 1 tind rind the narrative in this dictionary of mr websters exceedingly comprehensive but woefully disconnected no advantage you say your husband la Is deaf yes but bo be can read lip language I 1 cant call him fitin mean things just have to think thorn them the same OR as any other wife louisville courier juht oal GILL might take risk helen so you are acquainted acqUaInt eI with ar fr phillips kea airey airly goo look tas dont you mildred ye es and they say he has haa money t mind marrying urn him anft EXTREME CAUTION now flow would you like to make ones one million dollars in one year out of a gold mine asked the shifty promo ter nothing would please me better answered sir Dub walte then you are just tile man im looking for 1 I think not but you just said that I 1 would like to make one million dollars out of n gold mine in one year so go I 1 would but I 1 invest a dollar in the scheme unless the shaft was sunk stink in my own back yard and enough high grade ore were taken out the first day to pay off the mortgage on my house honse 11 no blood spilled the old fashioned bad man used to clean up a town with a pair of six abo shooters oters 11 true I 1 think modern methods are better yes nowadays when it becomes necessary to clean up a town we merely send out it a few fat inspectors to terrorize our foreign population engaged in the restaurant and fruit business 11 wasted energy colllns 1 I see your friend skinner has another selling out at cost sign tacked across the front of hla his store parter parker yes dont you know I 1 think skinner missed his vocation ile he should have been a political ca campaign m manager hollins because why parker because lie he to Is so good at nailing lies on the qui vive now illow Is the scenery out where you livel live infinitely varied billboards are plentiful and the advertise advertisements merits are frequently changed last month it was automobiles this month it Is cigarettes we can hardly watt wait to see what next month will bring an fn th fh ALL JEALOUS V ira ile he you fondle fondl 0 that rug pug puppy until I 1 am actually jealous of him I 1 she youre all alike this puppy to la jealous of you romance vs va R ralley Rall aliby ty gently the dow dew oer me s falling balling doubtless the poets words were true for lits his landlord was probably calling with the rent bill long overdue A sympathetic coroner and ana washer was her death 8 sudden udd etil asked the coroner of the principal witness yes was the reply the fall knocked her senseless and she never spoke a word afterward poor domant woman 1 sighed the coroner who was a married man of long standing what an awfully sad death something wrong somewhere that automobile salesman Is a persistent fellow he simply wont let me alone you cant blame him for trying hla his best to sell you a car under the circumstances I 1 do I 1 think th it rather inconsistent of him to act that way when he claims the car sells itself t an honest confession then you do not claim tobe to be a self made man mail suld said the astonished reporter no indeed decd replied the millionaire manufacturer the wealth I 1 have piled up Is due to the industry Ind and i faithfulness of the people in my employ 11 driven to it it it only makes bad matters worse to apologize when you happen to split spill something on the tablecloth tahle cloth 1 I suppose true on formal occasions ca replied mr thoughtfully but whenever I 1 do anything like lIkO that at home mrs always looks as if site she demanded an apology an economist did that collea colleague guo pc nt ours ever study political eed economy nomy yes tall replied senator Sorg sorghum hurM but his only idea of political econ economy Is s to nake make somebody else do the economizing while he grabs the appropriations the recerd atana wearily shifted the world from roni one shoulder to another to net got a i little ease ilk guess he muttered 1 I 1 am the fint drat victim of t holdup hold up methods me thoda |