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Show I preciatea that the committee agreed I to call it square if he would pay his own expenses. And it is generally conceded that but for his able atul energetic efforts! to which both political parties point with prule, we might have won the County Seat. Much of his greatness is due to the following maxims which he has strictly observed through life. viz. j namely, i. e. that is to say t Least done soonest ended. 2 Never do to day what can be put off till to-morrow. 3 Never borrow trouble, but borrow bor-row any other commodity you can. 4 Spero Meliosa. 5 Novus homo. 6 F.rin go timini F.pluribus braw. If his constitution had been equal to his ambition he would no doubt achieved greater things, but feeling that his loss would be a dire calam- j ity to the community he has restrain- j ! ed his towering ambition and thus saved the country from a state of " innocuous desuetude." He is at present engaged in the awe inspiring avocation of bartering chunks of wisdom, and holding down door steps, and street corners for the benefit bene-fit of mankind, where we will leave him with a kind of "j;et there Fli" expression on his classic features. Helieving you will catch on this with alacrity, that your multitudinous multitudin-ous sudscribers will devour it with avidity I trust to your care with timidity and sign with intrepidity. Com cs. Mt. 1'leasaut Sept. 1 1S90. Historical & Biographical San Pete, an J Her Sis and Daughters. Daugh-ters. AUTOBIOGRAPH Wiitteu (or Ihe Hfcistsk. Mr. Editor. As you desire a short sketch of my friend's life, I respond. He began life at a very eaily age ami was always con.ider-ed con.ider-ed small for his size. He was bom August 22nd, 1858, of poor.but muchly married parents, in Salt Lake City. From his father he inherited an immense fortune, consisting of a pair of made over buffalo jeans pants, and a full grown appetite. From his mother he was richly endowed with a vast number of second hand excuses for the evasion of all kinds of manual labor. He attended school in his native town and was always at the head of his class, which gained for him the title of "Senior Mischief." While but a mere boy he was engaged en-gaged as cashier in 1. C. M.' I. his duties consisting of cartvini! the cash from the salesman -to. the desk and returning with the chants. And it was here he gained 'his reputation which is fast becoming at least local for hie and early hours; that is, late to work in the morning and early to quit at nit;ht. When he arrived at man's estate, it was all the estate he had, so he went "west young man" and engaged in tht soul inspiring occupation of burning charcoal. In this business he amassed a collossal fortune composed com-posed chiefly of a Twenty-five Dollar Dol-lar note on a bankrupt man, and a venerable knock-kneed horse. This vast fortune he generously lavished on the poor and destitute, on his estate. The estate before referred too. At the age of twenty six, he was embued with the idea, that as, "it is not good for a man to be alone," he ought to marry as he could almost al-most support himself, he firmly believed be-lieved it was a poor woman who could not help a little. Consequently he wooed and won a beautiful maiden, to whom he is so devoted, that rather than see her health ruined for want of exercise, he allows hr to chop wood, feed stock, and do other pleasant and wholesome chores. After his marriage, he was employed em-ployed as a pedagogue; in this avocation he was so successiui m teaching the "young idea how to shoot," that the entire class graduated gradu-ated in pea shooting, to the delight of passers by, who felt the pleasant and warming effect of a flipped pea on the end of the nose. It was about this time he rendered render-ed valuable service to the State by accepting the office of Chief Justice of the precinct. All the eminent lawyers of the country will give voluntary testimonials of the impartial impar-tial manner in which he divided his time, between munching peanuts and whittling sticks. And the fairness fair-ness of his decisions are shown by the fact that attorneys for both sides, declared he was entitled to the degree of N. G. He next turned his attention to farminc, and as a tiller of the soil, a raiser of the thoughtful hen, a producer of the meditative swine.he was such a howling success, that he has concluded his great fund of knowledge of henotomy and hogol-ogy, hogol-ogy, ought to be given to the world in pamphlet form. Lookout for prospectus and agent bound in calf. He may, with justice, be called a self-made man, it would be an injustice in-justice to accuse any other person of his training. He is economic I in at lea two thirds, the truth, an. (his mticbv ! As a tjebii". speer n? .- ? ' ?-:' ;ifouad, l-.ri : - --: '- ' . s - 1 ---- - ; - ' T'- vv.--.i---..-1-.. :-.c :k.i.i tueir coiiH'osuie. In the recent County Seat cam I I paign his services were no greatly ap 1 |