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Show ON THE HILL '' By Ivm Hunch The electric chair is none toot rough for the low-brow who writes this column,. col-umn,. " -. , "- " ' ' Having come out without a scratch after the initial appearance and paying pay-ing up our insurance, we are off againl . ,: ' It didn't make them so mad after all, when one fellow mentioned that we had his name spelled wrong. ' ' ' "'Ammer, 'ammer, 'ammer on the 'ard 'ighway" Barney Jones speaking. speak-ing. "Barney" has several claims for distinction on the hill, for besides being be-ing machine shop timekeeper he is secretary of the Employee's Benefit association,' secretary of the General Committee, one of the chief organisers organis-ers and most enthusiastic members of the Utah Copper band, a fireman down town,, and last and foremost, he is a prince of- good fellows. Barney said the other day that if he ever loses the blue print to the shop he will never be able to find his way out. , , , We try not to choose prize fighters fight-ers or gunmen to write up in this column, not that we arc afraid of them, understand, for we have the record of making some few hundred Indians run once; that is, we ran and they ran after us how's that for rWyWAay,hatattrt to say, was that when we choose a fellow for a write-up it's our bet that he likes a joke even if it Is on himself. him-self. If he is a grouch and we lose the bet, it's like anything else, all we can do is try again. - Kenneth Woods, known to Bingham Bing-ham and its suburbs as 4he shiek of the office force, says that he is ready for another One of those banquets tike the office bunch had some time ago. The only objection he had was that the' gravy didn't match his vest. Joe Chicoli, better known to the world at large as "The Sweet Italian Boy," was at one time in the navy. Joe says that he still turns pale at the sight of a bean. It's little known to the home folks but Joe it seems, is about to inherit a cheese factory. To make a long story short, Joe's grandparents back in Italy ran one of these said factories and owing to a surplus of the filthy lucre are about to retire. They make goat cheese, the kind that makes you want, to climb on the roof. Anyway," Joe is going to put in a supply of gas masks and go back and run the thing. - Sup-, pose the next time we see Joe he will be known as the "Count of Goat-cheesea." Goat-cheesea." Something rotten here. Sam Feracco, the Rodolph Valentino Valen-tino of the track department, says that one could hardly call his Tord "Opportunity ,. for they say that opportunity op-portunity knocks but once. (The applause ap-plause is deafening.; Never-Sweat! approaching Jack Kennedy for a lay off: : "Mister Kennedy, kin I lay off tomorrow? to-morrow? ' Jack: "What's the matter now? Grandmother die again?" N. S.: "No sir, I want to go in and have my eyes examined." Jack: "Well, have a good job done. You'll be looking for work after tomorrow." to-morrow." Two "Dinkey, . Skinners," Elmer Knudsen and "Mickey" Butler were at the Salt Lake theatre to see a show. The outer curtain went up revealing re-vealing the word ''Asbestos" on the inner curtain. "Elmer," said Mickey, "what does that say on there?" "Why, that says asbestos, Mickey." "Oh hell, they had the same show the last time I was here." No, girls, there' isn't really any bulls in the "Bull Cane," , nor rws (Continued on 1'flge 7.) .1 j ,v boy answered, "Caulfield, Mister Tom Caulfield." And Tom said, "Here, darn you, give me back that quarter." Long before Art Mackes hair started to thin out, and ours too, we can well remember how much interest inter-est he took in the Postoffice. But not exactly in the mail (male). . It was always customary for the home folks in passing the postoffice to say. "Mail in yet, Art?", And when he wasn't at the postoffice; wellAndy McDonald was the mail carrier for the Copper in those days and we heard Andy relating just the other day that he had to have a special sack to bring the notes to and from the postoffice. According to Andy he was the Champion Lover in the canyon. Can you imagine it? A shiek in his day. We, mention this because we heard that, they are about to start the Company magazine again and we beg Art to dig up those old letters and turn them over for publication. publi-cation. They make darned interesting interest-ing reading! Judge: "What's your name, and what's the charge?" Prisoner: "My name is Sparks and I am charged with battery." Judge: "Put this guy in a dry cell." Johnnie Jackson, who needs no introduction, in-troduction, fell from the scaffolding while painting the office hallway the other day, narrowly missed landing on his head and gumming up the steps. In discussing the fall he explained ex-plained it this way: Said as he was painting along he got to thinking of how nice it would be if he had a lot of money like John Cunningham, Morris Cotter and some of those guys so he wouldn't really have to paint any more, if he didn't want to. Well, he became so absorbed in his thought and the idea got so realistic that he thought he had better feel in his pocket pock-et and see if that thousand dollar bill was still there. Alas! All he discovered discov-ered was a nickel, enough to buy one more package of Beech-Nut chewing tobacco. The shock was too great! Therefore he says, the fall. ' One thing that can be done with the club if it doesn't go over big is to change it into a home for broken down pool sharks from the hill. We was going to mention Poker Players, but we won't. Iva Hunch that after the above I've got one more week to live. On the Hill (Continued from page 1) either, although we gotta admit that those guys are the original Mexican athletes when it comes to pinning that animal's shoulders to the mat. In the space between the time one company nurse quits and until we can get another one, Bruce Pierson of the Safety department passes out the necessary soothing advice. Here is a sample of his morning's work (over the phone): "Mrs. Rielly wants , to know how long babies should be nursed." Bruce: "Tell her the same as short ones." It is said that Tom Caulfield, chief buller of the bull g?.ng has such a large family that one day while stand-ingdown stand-ingdown town he wanted a kid to go on an errand for him, calling a little boy over he said, "Here kid, is a quarter. Run down to the store for me, etc., etc.," all the time looking look-ing intently at the little fellow's face. As the kid was about to start away Tom said, "By the way, boy, what's your father's name?" To which the |