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Show GETTING INTERESTED ii DO NT reckon I'll i 2nT ever to una0I 2f mf stand girls," volun- sm I v teered tho young YmJ ' barber, as he twlst- 7jB, f(l Itobblnbun's nos" y Bf-'7 into a positlou of jJ5 ) "Thai will be un-l-Jl fortunate for the girls," said his vlc-, vlc-, tlm. "I believe you! There's half a dozen girls I might have married if I'd only understood them." "And as you did not understand them I presume they're all single?" "No, they're all married!" "licaso keep your mind on your work, and do not look so ferocious. I don't want my head removed " "Tho first one of them was a queen! 1 would havo hooked up with In i all right only I didn't under- stand her." "Go on, you Interest me strangely." "She was a swell looker! Big eyes, teeth, lips why, this one even had pretty elbows." "A paragon, indeed! J "Nope, a Presbyterian. You never seen such a thirst for information. I took her to all the ball games, and she I just ate up the baseball dope and j wanted more, i carried baseball his-I his-I tory to her house by armfuls I give her the whole history of tho throe , leagues, the family history of eVery ! player, aud his battin' average. Be-' Be-' lleve me. I give that dame some education. edu-cation. Then I happened to mention horse racing and she set up and took immediate notice, and 1 read her the hie tory of every plug, harness and saddle, and ihcii record, from Adam's , time. She just fattened on It Then sho got interested in dogs " "Began to warm up to you. ch?" "I believe you! And automobiles! , When I got through with her she 1 knew every car lhat had ever won " "To make a long story short, you did not marry her." "Nope, I didn't und rsland her. I j educated that girl. Everything she known I learned her I thought I had j her ready tr. e-t off my hand, when j tin brother brought a guy horn-' v, i;h him one evcuiug whilst f was settiu' iherc and It was all ou." , "Did he throw you out?" "Nothing like that He shook both ii ;'her hands and said: 'My! My! Who- if ever would have thought a scrub like ! Jack could have such a stuunin' sister! sis-ter! I'll bet you designed lhat gown yourself! You certainly do look I charmln'! I tell you It takes an art- ist to know how to wear clothes!" I "Was ho right?" I "I s'pose so; I hadn't never noticed i'; that. But, say I used to think she was I ; hungry for the stuff I d been givin' ' her, but you should have seen tbo u ' , greedy thing inhale what he was feed- it I ' In' her! She didn't know when I went home." r "Do you think it was altogether his ft ! line of conversation that did It?" "What else could it have been0" jf "Maybe a combined odor of onions and cigarette smoko was distasteful ,t to her." "I never el onions or smoked eigai - ettes when I was goin' callin'. I kuew what is due to a lady On them nights I conflnfd myself to garlic and fc Swiss cheese, aud smoked aothiu' bt u I my meerschaum." , B. - |