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Show (Copyright, 1011. tr ttic New York Herold Co. All right rM-rrej.) ' H ITK Man Hater composed herself on her wln- I dow seat with an It"s-all-ln-knowIng-how air. J My Lady Manicure scented a good room to : i room talk and waited receptively. ' "I don't sec any use in letting a man sup- 1 port you when you can do It yourself," began the Man f Hater. x I She always began this way; what was more lnter- I cstlng she always ended this way. Her consistency, given her sex, made her quite worth writing home Hf about. B "But It's lots harder,"" replied my Lady Manicure, Wf "to kec the ball rolling." H "It's easier' snllTed the Mnu Hater, "if jou only B knew It. And it's what you don't know In this world Hf that hurts you." HI My Lady Manicure experienced genuine surprise 111 wiUi one who dared set at naught so old a proverb, ft "Yes," continued the feminine sage, "tun man who HI. is killed by the automobile does not know what has Hi hurt him. But it hurts him all the same. The little HI boy who eats thc apple he has stolen from the push- HI cart does not know what hurts him when he has the Hf stomach ache. But It hurts him Just the same. And Ml to it goes- You can nee again and again that it's what Hf you don't know that hurts you. That is the way with Iff marriage and letting a man support you. You don't lift know it, consequently you cannot dodge. And you get 111 hurt. They say it is never too lato to mend, but ou In the question of marriage, let me tell you, 'No!' in time Ilk. saves more than nine. Follow .Punch, and 'Don't!' " llr "But Isn't it better than starving?" inquired My If Lady. If "Pc never starved," dryly replied the Man Hater, It squirming her little feet into another1 position ou' the H window seat till a soft rustic of silken petticoats was ' H 'beard. VWVVWVt VlVtWWVVVVWt.VVWL VtVt VVVfcVVVV WVVVV-fcVVV VVfcV VVMAVfc vv ----- Bread and Bisttcr Philosophy by a Man Hater. My Lady sighed enviously at the sound. "How do you do It?" she naked. The Man Hater laughed 'the laugh of power and gavp her skirts another delicious .swish. "Oh, by being up and doing; with an emphasis on the 'doing; though of course thc 'up' has quite a lltUo to do with It." "But how do you get up?" My Lady persisted. "I don't wait to be called. I call myself. Or In the words of Washington and the poker player I stand on my own bluff. I keep up appearances. When you have kept up appearances Jong enough they will begin to keep you up." "Oh, yes," cried My Lady, with u sudden Illumination Illumina-tion of understanding, "A la Mrs. Chadwick." "Well, partly," deliberated the Man Hater. "Only Bhe did not keep them up. She dropped thorn. And they sunk, and took her -with them. She was not a real financier. A real financier Is one who knows how to make things float, whether it be stocks or appearances." ap-pearances." Whatever they be you must keep them up. Getting at tho bottom of things Is bad for the fruit seller. Now look at thc life insurance companies. compa-nies. They were all right as long as they kept up appearances. "In other words, keep above water. Water Ls all right If you keep on top. Why, even old Noah knew that. Don't sink. Float Float nnd the world floats (wlth you; sink, and you sink alone. Some people ecem to have the Idea, that It Is the highest thing which floats best. Not so ivlth heads which are closely allied with appearance; It Is the lightest bead which sinks the quickest. As I said before, stay up. Keep lip appearances." - ' The eyes of My Lady were wonder wide. Never BY ROXANN WHITE. place her first trip to thc circus had they been so distended. dis-tended. Needless to say she did not grasp thc argument, argu-ment, nowever, she continued It, which was something. some-thing. "But what do you do to keep up appearances?" asked My Lady. The Man Hater regarded her a moment In pity, then in pity continued. "Keeping up appearances is looking prosperous." "But how can one look prosperous on $15 a week or less?" walled My Lady. "Try a correspondence course," said the Man Hater, mockingly. "But, to be serious, if you are going to win you will have to spend well. I have been told it is what you savo that makes you rich may be. But it does not rnnke you friends, though It may make you enemies, and It doos not make you appear. It might seem that what Now York people lived for was to appear. Looking at It tbo other way around, peoplo have to appear to live. I say It Is what and how you bpend that makes you to-day. Now, I have lived, really lived, on very little, but it was only by care-Let care-Let me tell you how I once mado an umbrella, a common com-mon black silk umbrella, support me for two -tveeks well " "How you made an umbrella support you? Why, how did you ever do It?" asked the Lady. "Well, I did It; that Is a fact, and facts talk. I'll tell you; thc umbrella bent a man all out on Bupport-lng. Bupport-lng. It was this way. I had In a particularly proH-porous proH-porous week bought myself a black silk umbrella, aud pnld ?8 for It. it had been marked down from $12. It was n beauty. But n luck would have It It never rained ouee all the next week. In fact. It wan euch beautiful weather that to have appeared with an umbrella um-brella would have been ridiculous. I know had I been able to carry that umbrella It would have glvcu me enough of a prosperous look to have carried me through. As it wns. I had a bad week. At the end I was dead broke. I simply had to get some money 'or starve. There was only one thing to do." The Man Hater paused nnd looked tragically at the Lady. The Lady looked tragically back at the Man Hater. "What did you do?" gasped the Lady. "I took that umbrella down to the place I bought It itnd returned It." "Oh!" "Yes," went on the Man Hater, "1 returned that umbrella and got my money back. lDlght dollars.-Rut dollars.-Rut that didn't end things." - "Mercy 1 They stopped you at the door and and." ventured My Lady. "No," said the Man Plater with contempt. "How cpuld they? I had not done anything to be stopped for. I had only returned what I had got there. They could not refuso their own goods very well. No, I got outsldo and found It was raining. And I had on my good lint. 1 ran for a car, and whom should 1 find tliere but a man I knew. He came and sat beside me. ' You did not start out for rain,' he remarked, noticing, notic-ing, I suppose, my umbrellaless condition. " 'Yes, I did.' I told him. 'But It Is not how you start out; It Is how you end that counts.' ' 'T then said I had just left on eight dollar umbrella where I bad laRt shopped, ne eeemrd very sorry that I had been so unfortunate as to leave It. Of course.-; I never told him it was detained by request When I got -to mv street he Insisted on escorting mc lOAiuy j door under I1I9 umbrella. He eald my 4hat a'Jloo pVetty to spoil.' Olou sue tnere appearrinceswere rak- Ing care of me. If my hat had not been "worth saving , If H he would never have thought of saving It It ended In 1, H his taking mc out to dinner And on Monday he sent ju H me a beautiful umbrella. The very one I had wanted to 7f H buv when I had purchased mine, but It was too ex- k H pensive. It was thirteen dollars. He sent It with a j j little note saying it was for the girl who could so ,j cheerfully lose an eight dollar umbrella. I did feel i rather mean. But he had misunderstood mo at hlu Mi H own risk." 1M H "And so you have a much nicer umbrella now," j 1 sighed My Lady. "" ' II H "No." confessed the Man Hater: "I really could not ig H afford to keep that umbrella. It was a little too much. J H Mv landlady came in and she admired It so much that jfttf .H I told her f would let her havo It for two weeks' room W lM ront which would, bc'$10. That let her have It $3 , H cheaper than she could have bought It. 1 told her it m was a great bargain and she took It" f M "Well, yqu are a wonder. But what did you do ror , jm an umbrella?" llllfl "I went back intending to buy a cheap umrcf.fr I'fflH a while, and tliere was my own umbrella "'arkea I 4IM down to half price, it wns their custom, the girl 'IH told me. to mark down returns. So you seo I just mM bought that one back. In all I made two weeks room iB rent a dinner and got a twelve dollar umbre In for ?U $4. out of that one umbrella. It was a good line J- ment open or closed. You ask Dooley if ngood In- f,H vestment is not one that pays open or closed. sM lH You certainly are wise," said My Ladj J H With the wisdom of the worldly. But al this only M goes to show that if you do you can. No; don t : let a WM man support you If you can do it yourse f. There are, fll hundreds of ways of getting over " tight pIulo. 1 jM have a friend who. when she Bete out oC money on M Saturday and must have some quickly, goes clown to . lH the gs company and tells them she Is mov log and that MM she must have the deposit on her meter Then she fM changes her mind to the gas company in a t a or JH two-St takes a day or two for them to come and turn H off the gas-and before that time buys it ij",t fl r "I see." remarked thc Lady Manicure. "Jf I expect JM to live I must get wisdom.'' .-' - . ' H - ,,"Bo a, Solomon. He was wise. , But O J ?JJ H JmnnvMjfonien Jib had to inake,mlni so;" , finished the t ffH 'Man "Hater '" ' 1 |