Show I N N N N H N N N N N N H i N N N H N N NON N I 11 i. i i 1 jl Rings Ring's Low-Down Low on j Deep Subject f f f s f Q Dy y RING LARDNER t j HN I I H N N 1 NON N HN NN To o the Editor It seems like as If It was up to m meto me meto to settle ii a hi hit big argument which hns S occurred between n Al 1111 ant Jack Tack It must be exclaimer that Mr II Kieran Is one of the base huse bail hail writers on the New York Times runes and n a prominent golf player Mr Mamaux Is somewhat of a 11 veteran big bib league baseball pitcher who used to he bo the hest best singer in the big h leagues The Tho argument was reported d II by Mr Ir Harry of the De Do Detroit troit News Mr h is n a tall skinny handsome brunette who looks not noL unlike the tho writer ani only he has more moro hair Well It seems like Ule Mr Mamaux and Mr leran Kieran got Into InLo a fishing argument argument ment namely Mr Ir Mamaux claimed that If you took a u bucket tho the bucket would welsh weigh just the tho same like us if no fish had been dropped ped into ItA it itA A itA live fish lisp cant can't possibly increase the weight of water said suld Mr Ma- Ma Influx A dead fish that is different differ differ- different ent matter because that would he be dead weight 1111 II the they went to n laboratory In iii Detroit where this bitter bittor argument started l null nud asked the professor of offish fish Ush which was right and who was wrong so the tho professor said he would make a n test but he ho didn't have no live e fish Ush on hand that day and Mr Ir would not stand for no test being made with a n dead fish Finely th they thoy went wem to a it fish Ush market and they had a 11 tub full of water water there weighing weigh weilt- ing Ins Oi 0 K pounds and thc they found a fish mated Carp who weighed three pounds and the they put It In the tub and then weighed the total which weighed 97 Hi pounds so Mr Ir Mamaux claimed that clinched his argument because In the first place the carp was dead and In the second place he only Increased the weight of the tub tuh two pounds whereas the fish man admitted admitted ad ml- milled that his weight before heintz dropped into the tub was three pounds That shows how right I am nm said Mr Mamaux No 0 It don't dont retorted Mr Kieran All It It Ii proves is that nobody with any nuy brains should ought to bu buy fish from this market Well friends the reason renson I feel called upon Ullon to horn Into this merit ment is that lint all my life Ufe I been milkIng milk milk- Ing g a study of weights and displacements displacements displace displace- ments and etc and I will give she you ou afew afew a n few facts to prove that it Is a very er trick tricky subject and a person should not ought to get Into no argument In regards to same unless they have e mastered It IL ILIf I If you OU will go Into a n restaurant and order a n large glass of milk and weigh welsh It before you OU touch cup to lip you will find that the total weight I Is about one ounce Then If you will wait n a few moments till a n fly drops into the tIie glass and weigh It again why If the Il fly Is Ic Just a n common fly ny and still aliT alts you ou will find that th the tho weight of the entire project aint Increased Increased In In- cre creased sed even en one fly Oy weight but If the fly was dead when It dropped In why then will be a Increased weIght of 10 U and no hundreds minims a n specially specially if the fly was a n horse fly 01 On the other hand If you ou take a apall apall apall pall of water or beer and drop a n live rat In same the weight of the pall will Increase exactly ns as much as th the rat wei weighed he In the first place and I It you ou make it two rats the weight will increase increase pro rata But If one or both bothof bothof of the lie rats happens to get drowned the they thoy will come to the surface looking like tike drowned rats and at nt the same time proving that they didn't weigh nothing or they would woul of sank It is kind of dangerous to make this test In a n pall pail of at heel Deer as fiS the rats goes right to It and are arc libel to reach the singing stage The most conclusive e test 1 t ever e made along these lines was one time when I took a night boat from flom N. N Y to Albany on the Hudson river rI First It was necessary to weigh the river rl and then the boat when It was empty and afterwards when nil the passengers passengers gers got a u board Then I made all nil the passengers come Into the weighing weigh weigh- ing tag room and get weighed one by one When the boat got to Albany the next morning the river rl looked Just like me It did the last time I was up there Prof Irot Sump of Severe University New Now Hampshire once made mado a experiment expert expert- went ment which perhaps proves pro more than the tine foregoing He De weighed all the passengers that was going on a trip from New York to Cherbourg find then w weighed them Ulem all again when the ship got to Cherbourg They didn't weigh near us much Prof Sump was much Impressed CG i by the tho Bell Syndicate Inc Ino |