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Show OUR CHILDREN 8 By AiNGELO PATRI THE LONG AND SHORT IT TAKES a nice sense of discrimination discrimi-nation to know when to encourage a child to independent actioD and when to restrain him. The aim of all our teaching is to make the children self-helpful- The great problem is to know when it is safe to send them out on their own. One Is never sure. It is certiiin that we cannot bring op a child to the post adolescent stage as a dependent child and on his birthday birth-day anniversary, turn him loose with the idea that he can take care of himself. him-self. Self-direction is not bd overnight matter. It is a slow growth fed by experiences. ex-periences. Some of these experiences must come in infancy, the others following fol-lowing along in their appointed places. The infant is dependent upon us for bis very life, but if we continue to keep him so he will, he must, continue to be an infant. We cannot ignore the various stages of growth and expect them to mature. Without use, the budding powers wither and die. Good training involves understanding of the various phases of child growth so that they may be developed Id turn and at the high tide of their powers. Self help begins when the baby can hold his owd bottle, or help to hold it and It continues as long as there Is strength In his body, even dowo to ol ' age. The span in between is one of steady progress, adjustment, mastery. mas-tery. How soon a child can be freed of home supervision depends upon the serf of child he Is. the kind of training train-ing he has. the sort of environment he meets In his daily experiences. As soon as yo- see that a child can complete com-plete a Job without your supervision, praise him and tell him so. He will master physical tasks first. Make a lot of his success. Know that the spiritual victories come later and their roots are In these first tasks. There comes a difficult time when children feel grown up. To themselves them-selves they nre able to go anywhere, face any situation, carry my respoo-slbilithy. respoo-slbilithy. To us who know them, who have followed every stage of their growth, they are not able to go alone. They are long on one side and short on another. It won't do to make them Infants. It won't do to make them adults. We have to piece out their short sides and help them along until both sides balance. There Is no easy way. One steps ulong gingerly, living a day at a time, moving a snail's pace. By and by the miracle works nnd the child Is a man, a woman. In his own right. One Just gropes and prays and comforts and counsels until then. WHAT OF IT? MUCH of our complaining about the children Is of no account-Many account-Many of our sharp criticisms are unnecessary. un-necessary. We have the picture of our Ideal of n child In mind and when the actual child differs from the dream we are troubled, or annoyed, and attempt at-tempt to make the child conform to our notion. Most of the friction In families Is caused by this mistaken attitude. at-titude. If a chlhl Is born with n pug nose nnd the finally likes straight ones bet I tei If he has freckles and mother prides herself on her clear skin. If he lias lilu hands and feet nnd lather has I dainty ones. If he Is reticent nnd the family lonuacious. what of HI What can he do nbout It? Or you for that matter? The child was born with characteristic characteris-tic plislcal features, with certain stroiu traits and tendencies. Are you going to make his life miserable because be-cause you fancied a different set for him? Or are yon going to accept him good humoredly and do your best to hell) him grow to his own advantage? Next time you feci tempted to sutler liecause your child lias some annoying characteristic, one that Is not truly fundamental to Ills mental and physl cal health, lust ask yourself. "What of It?" Keep asking until the answer comes to you. ".lust nothing nt nil." This child Is going to make tils way In the world In spite of his red hair, or his nw kwardness or his weight. What counts Is his mind. If that Is strong. It Is beautiful, nnd mental beauty Illuminates Illu-minates the body with a radiance that wipes out all crudities. If a child Is made to feel unlit, his mind sulTcrs I am against mental suffering suf-fering for children ndults. too. for that matter. I believe that It Is our duty to save children from mental distress dis-tress whenever we can. We ought (o he on the alert to prevent It. 'Flint means we should not make remarks nhout n child's personal characteristics characteris-tics In n way that wounds his spirit. If n child Is awkward, study how to lielp him grow In grace, remembering all young tilings lire clumsy nt (he start. If hair Is straight when curls would lu lovelier. If It Is n dlllicnlt color, dress It (o advantage. No healthy child ever had ugly hair. If he tins a blemish or a deled thai you can help, help II. If It can't be helped, w hat of It " I don't believe chlMi'cn grow ihclr own rcellm:" of Inferiority. I believe they are made for them by mistaken ndults. If a child Is laken as he Is. with good humored ufiivllon. be Isn't going to look for something to worry himself about, lie will say as jou say, "What "f It?" llnll S.vnilli ! NU rl- |