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Show BROTHER'S HOME j The fact that his supposedly adored ' llg brother was returning home from allege that day had b3en carefully concealed .from ten-year-old Tommy : until became back from school. "Tommy," snld bis mother, after l her younger son bad gone upstairs to ; wash his face and the elder had been f coneeuled in the pr.ntry, "I have a big surprise for you." "I know what It is," replied Tommy unconcernedly. "Brother's back." "Why, how did vou guess that!" " 'Cause my money-box won't rattl . any more." - j Had to Walk Back. j "You are an hour late this morning, ' ; Sam," said an employer to his negro . J servant. "Yes, sah, I was kicked by a mule on my way, sah." "That ought uot to have detained you an hour, Sam." ' "Well, you see. boss, it wouldn't U he'd only kicked me In this direction; but he kicked me de other way." JUST REVERSED. Doctor: Did ho take the medicine . prescribed for him religiously? Nurse: No, sir, he swore every time. Gloom. The camper huddled In hta tent, VVaa gloomy as could be, lie aantf this Bong of discontent, "it's raining rain on me." Something in a Name. "Now here's a neat bungalow," said Ihe real estate agent. "Just the thing for you, and only $5,000." "l et's enter into an unliable conspiracy," con-spiracy," suld the prospective customer. cus-tomer. "Kh?" "Call It a cottage and cut the price." The Cashier. A young woman weut to call on a lady who bad entertained her. The hitter's tive-yenr old duuehter. who was ploying on the luwn, said: "Mamma Isn't at home." "I am sorry," replied the young woman, "for I have come to pay my party call." "h, I'll take the money," said the child promptly. ' - " That Was All. Holiorts .Hires did not stay long when he called on you at the otlice. Unlilnson No; he wanted to burrow l and went away as soon as he got It. "1 see; Just a case of touch and go." London Tlt-IMts. The Riflht Inotlnct 1 "Come, Dorothy," mUl her father Impatiently, "throw your doll on the lied and hurry or we slinll be late." "Daddy, how enn you?" reproved the child. "I isn't that kind of a muv ver." ON THE WING "That new cook Is a bird." "Yes, a bird of passage. She's fjo. Ing to leave tomorrow." Back Numbers. Concerning- college football teams. Too oft It routes to pass The man who's halfback In the Hold Is 'way bark In his class. Figuring. Madge What are you thinking about, dear? MurJorle I hope bobbed hu!r won't go out of style before mine grows again. No Long Distance Appeals. "Wife going to the seashore this slimmer?" "No, decided to rtny at home where the money supply Is close at hand." the Poor Lover. He had exhausted the weather ns a subject of conversation. He eyed his frayed hat as he turned It self-consciously on his knee. "It's about wore out," be apologized. "Why don't you wear It out?" she j asked pointedly. Hint on Dancing. Bhe You should change your style of dancing a little. He In what wayl Bha You might occasionally step on ,. mj raft foot. Irish Independent. |