Show kathleen norris says 1 married love affairs come high IBM bell syndicate service C co W A remember he used to call you my little duchess and moon around places where you were dining with bill by KATHLEEN NORRIS F MARRIED men with good I 1 IF if unexciting wives could get it through their heads that the fascinating swe sweethearts sweetheart ethear ts they want so much to marry mar ry after a divorce are just the same as other women and will make wives no better and no worse how simplified and stabilized marriage would be and if attractive young women mildly bored with seven or eight years of bif wifehood ee could possibly foresee th the complications into which tempt ing illicit affairs on the side would draw them one of americas most serious social problems would be lessened but a husband will continue to think that the lovely eager sympathetic girl in the office has no faults and his will 9 dreaming of the perfect lover like that man she met at janes so polite so handsome so attentive and so the mischief goes on breeding incalculable difficulties heart breaks disillusionments for all concerned same situation over ag again in when mildred divorces bill and marries george things usually go wonderfully for a few haps three but then if any woman friend is mean enough to remind her of some of her sentiments at the time of the divor divorce ce she meets a cold stare from mildreds eyes eye mildred remember things exactly that way ill never forget how you ond and george adored each otherl other babbles the friend do you remember you two used to meet at chez louis and simply stare at each other for hours remember he used to call you my little duchess and moon around places where you were dining with bill no mildred remember that she admits that bill was such a brute she had to divorce him or go mad and that george had been crazy about her for years and so she married him further than this she go the subject seems to hold no interest for her sensible viewpoint no marriage retains after the first few months or year the trembling glamour of the honeymoon sensible women know it and resist the illusions illusion of the new affair and sensible men remind themselves that the girl irl friend all sympathy youth fragrance lure today will turn after a few years of marriage into just another faulty unreasonable selfish and extravagant companion as was the discarded wife which brings us to bobbys bobbye Bob bys letter which came to me a few weeks ago this is part of it after a few years of marring marriage e when our two girls were seven and five writes bobby 41 my wife and I 1 drifted apart we S seemed to have no interest in common and life became camb a dull and dragging affair for us both I 1 was then traveling for rny my firm and met a woman I 1 will call hazel H a zel she was a most sympathetic syma and understanding friend and we becane lovers hazel giving up tip her job and ana maintaining a little establishment in a town some 20 miles from my home I 1 i bobbys bobbye complicated problem when my wife discovered this she bhe left me but did not immediately apply for a divorce A year passed and I 1 was promoted moved to ani other iother city and had an opportunity tunit y to meet some unusually interesting people one of these a young rad radio 0 actress is everything I 1 ever dreamed of finding in a woman 0 of f fins fine family beautifully ully educated lovely in every way we wa are deep deeply in love margaret tho the radio a ac c aress if ess for the first time my problem is hazel who insists upon my marrying her as soon as my divorce is granted which will be late in june she has changed completely so that my original feeling for heris her is wholly destroyed she is critical bitter threatens a lawsuit ditl indeed her lawyer has been in in touch with me naturally in my notes to her in the beginning of our affair I 1 mention marriage and she proposes to take advantage of them she can hurt me very much with my firm and of course with margaret should she pursue this course cours p fleps please a dylse nw me beasto asto any obligation I 1 may have in t the he matter and as to the best way of handling it my advice to bobby might have been that hadid he did have an obligation johazel to hazel in the matter or I 1 might have suggested that he marry no one for awhile having complicated the lives of three women so thoroughly answers own question i but buc before I 1 had time to answer this letter it was answered by a telegram from bobby which arrived this morning the telegram reads please disregard and destroy letter hazel and I 1 married last night bobby so this now loveless and stale relationship lation ship has ended with a wedding after all but weddings begin something as well as end something and it is a grim sort of contract contri ct into which hazel and bobby have entered he is paying his first wife alimony and he will soon be paying a doubled alimony to his second wife a beriou seriously slY crippling situation financially it if margaret decides to join this fascinating gentleman as his third wife she will have to retain her well paid position and contribute substantially to the family budget not real marriage not real marriage this sort of thing and women in their hearts want real marriage they want the richness of that tried and tested relationship lation ship that shares ups and downs good times and bad that weathers the long years builds up a thousand memories of breakfast table talks nursery cares kitchen crises 1 scares cares and relief from scares eberg emergencies ocies changes and long serene periods of happiness and companionship it is a foolish man or woman who jeopardizes al all I 1 this for a fleeting passion a deceptive time of flattery and delusion that all experience v all history all good common sense sens i pronounces to be just one more will o the wisp over and over again the victim of the mar married ried love affair emerges a sadder and wiser man or woman the home that once seemed so dull appears to the divorced wife a very haven of safety and content her heart aches for her children whether she has them with her in the chaos of wreckage or whether they are staying for awhile with jims mother the dis covery that her new mate has hu min man faults abruptness and selfish ness and lack of understanding is a bitter blow she has caused all this trouble on the ground that der dar ling leonard was the perfect man it is rather flat to begin to say of 0 leonard the same bored critical things she said so recently of jim take a look at the couples who threw discretion to the winds and startled their respective circles with tho the revelation of a grand passion a few years ago before you take the leap |