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Show . ' I John Mitchell belongs in the senate of the 'United States. People like to be buffaloed. Even Elbert Hub- 'bard knows that. ' If there is no hell where do our political op- .poiients go when they die? j Is this a people's government? It does not look j like one in Washington, .D C. It is about time that the cities of New York I and Chicago had Catholic daily papers. I It will soon be an opportune time to send a j poor friend a dead turkey to keep him alive. I A broken love match can be repaired with a I little court plaster and the flams started anew. The tariff wall will have to be raised consid- I ; erably when importation is carried on in airships. j ; Every man believes in heaven and hell after he dies, which goes to prove that seeing is believ- I :ing- I 1 That meats hare dropped in price a little, fur- I niehes a silver lining to the recent financial I ' clouds. i , . f ; j Every Catholic who has strong faith is in duty bound to do something spiritually for his weaker I brother. President Roosevelt has been killing bears. Was he' getting in trim to slaughter a few more ' trusts? We fervently hope so. ! Some of those who got in on the ground floor (on Bome recent "good things" have discovered that ! ' .the cellar "was still under them. The election is over and some of the candidates ' won, and we knew they would long before this ' time. It happens every election. I The time is ripe for a strong American national ; .labor party. How long is the senatorial toga to enfold en-fold criminal millionaires exclusively? j , There are more drunkards and infidels in one corner of England than there is in all of fragrant 1 end Catholic Erin. Xow what do you think of j that? " What has become of that German professor who I pome years ago asserted food decided the gender of j 'I children. Did the race suicide discussion drive ' him into oblivion? l If a person pours coffee into his saucer he I breaks a rule of etiquette, and if he accidentally pours it on an individual beside him something else ' is liable to' be broken. I ; Christian Science teaches there exist as a vital I ineradicable force no pain or Borrow, if our au- thority is correct. What, then, it may be asked, I ! becomes of the bloody sweat of Christ in the gar- !, den of Gethsemanc and his groanings an the cross? I There is some inconsistency here. ; A California college president said recently ; that no unskilled laborer can' be a desirable citizen, i He must be effected by the heat out there, that is if he docs not drink. He should move to Chicago ; ; end let the lake winds blow some sense into him or he might take a bath once in a while. There j ite something seriously the matter with him, what- f ever it is. Anyhow we are glad he is not a Catholic. Cath-olic. A great many men could set the children a good example if they would observe the curfew law. Parents sometimes wonder where their children acquired such winsome characters, the parents not having lost any of their own winsomeness. The beautiful tnow will soon be with us, which proves that either God made the four seasons of the year, or that they grew on an apple tree. If anyone, even an Ithica professor, wishes to destroy the Roman Catholic church he must first kill God. Xow what do you think of that? The professor who said the Catholic church was dead has never spoken since, except in a subdued 1 nr i i ,i i i . .i , wuisper. Jiyue ne inmKs ne is at the wake. At the time of going to press we had not heard of the organization of any new religious sect. Which was a marvelous fact and so we record it. Ireland is still practicing the holy religion she received from St. Patricuis in 432 which shows how a good thing will sometimes stick. Xow what do you think of that ? The Xorth German Lloyd Steamship company is a trust, it would be a blessing if someone would bust. It is as brutal to its German employes as the devil is to a mad dog. Matter is lifeless and cannot move itself. This world is a large mass of matter continually revolving revolv-ing in space. What power moves it? It certainly cannot be the Republican party. There is only one thing about the gas meter joke which spoils it for Salt Lake, and that is that the gas meters approximate correctness in their measurements of gas consumed. St. Paul prior to his miraculous conversion consented to the death of Stephen and thereby was a murderer himself. That lie afterwards became a great saint was the work of God. Xext year will be the presidential election. If Bill Bryan should "happen to run Bill Taft may run after him. But then the latter is very fat, and a fat horse never could beat a lean one. Every day for two weeks the press dispatches ! from Xew York have 6aid that everything is all right, which assurances are comforting to people whose proportion of everything is small. , Professor Starr of the Chicago University as-' serts the American newspaper reports of Congo atrocities were greatly exaggerated. We knew that before Professor Starr did. Long before. M I . The Qatholic church says that if any man asserts as-serts the sacraments were instituted to foster faith let him be anathema. But then 6uch a man I does not really need to be anathematized. He should be in an insane asylum. The Bishop of London asserted the existence of the Angelican church of which he is an honorable hon-orable member, prior to the reign of Henry VIII. of sweet memory. But then he was in a jovial j xnood, and one must jest sometimes, don't you know. 1 Herbert Spencer maintained that human- life was generated by the chemical and physical combination com-bination of meterial atoms, which in their separated separ-ated condition had no such power or life. "Which goes to demonstrate how a great man can talk like a sausage machine. Every business man should advertise in a Catholic Cath-olic paper, for if any publication struereles for the preservation of haw and order it is-it. And without with-out law and order there could be no business stability. sta-bility. Do you see the point? We certainly hope so, and that your ad. will soon be with us. If a man's body is motionless while asleep and yet he dreams dreams and talks with dead friends a3 thousands do, evidently there is more in human nature than a combination of material atoms. Will some kindly philosopher of atheistic principles trot out for our inspection a chunk of rock that dreams? We read recently that the Methodists have "converted" "con-verted" about thirty Roman Catholic Italians after spending millions' of dollars. It sounds like the report of a battle from the Philippines, which reads: "Another outbreak in the Philippines. Two little Filipinos were captured by a Yankee regiment." regi-ment." The latter ought to be home shoveling coal or snow. Father Timothy Dempsey of St. Patrick's parish, par-ish, St. Louis, is one of God's noblemen. A heavenly heav-enly prince on earth. His memory will be cherished cher-ished and kept green in the hearts of many wanderers wand-erers long after he is cold in his grave. If we were in Peter's chair at Rome there would be a Cardinal Dempsey in America, and that very quickly. As a result of the financial panic in Xew York, many people have withdrawn their money from banks, savings deposit and trust companies, and, not being able to rent a box in the safe deposit vaults, are compelled to improvise hiding places for their coin. The burglars of the metropolis know this, and are expected to be especially active in plying their trade until the money scare ends, as is evidenced by the warnings sent out by the police department to the citizens of the city to beware be-ware of the night visitors. Between the burglars and the high financiers the people seem to have a hard time to remain calm. It is easier to find out what is the matter than it is to find a cure for the trouble. Christianity is not praying loud and letting your wife shovel the snow from the sidewalk. Great thinkers maintain that they do their most effective work on an empty -stomach, which per se may explain the heavy thinking of a man up against it. Chinese football, according to a consular representative rep-resentative in Harper's Weekly, is played with fifty men on the side, and a game lasts two or three days. Evidently the Chinese have no patience with, doing things by halves. |