OCR Text |
Show LH NATURE NOTES, BY LITTLE H JOHNNY. H The H The rat shbud ot to follcr the cat H in books, but it aint so in real life. H The rat eats chees when he can git H j some thats good, but Dutch nocks M I him! There was a man bated a trap l with Dutch chees, and pretty sune he began, to And ded rats evry mornin, M I but the trap had never been sprang. B Then he foun out the rats was starved H to death, cos they had wore off their B teeths a nawing the trap and cudent B' take their meals. They thot, poor H tihings, the traps was the bae and the Bl! Dutch was the trap. Bj It was my sister's young man tole IH me that about the Dutch. When he B comes for to se my siter he asks one Bj how am I a gittin on with my natural B history, and then he tells me things Bf wich Ime welcome for to put into it, B and my sister says wot a fib, and I B mussent bleeve a word he tels me, and B looks in his eye with hern, but he aint B a bit a irade. Hern are brown, but BB hisn is gray, and so is rats. B Rats is kild by tairlers, wicli are put fl into a circur pformance, where the B rats is cetched and let go. If it wasn't B for these tariers the rats would be too fli m,any to live. Bishop Hatto was et B by rats evry little tiny bit up, and Bt serve him mighty well rite, too; but B rats don't eat bishops now, cos there H is more bishops than there is rats. H Gras Hoppers. B Uncle Ned he said: "Johnny, have B you rote eny thing about gras hop- i pers?" B And I said: "How cude I, wen they B wont set stil long enuff for to be rote fH, a bout, like babya wich wont be took H' fotographts." Hk But Uncle Ned he said: "Wei, John- Hj ny, you kno best, and I spose you are H rite. I had a little story a bout gras H hoppers, but if you dont care for em, HH lie lei it to Mister Pitchel," thats the Bf' parson. Then wen I crido Uncle Ned told me the story. Once there was ome Injun sabbages had a big war dance, all fethors an paint like hornets, and shakin their Tommy box, and yelln fritefle! One of e,m he roled his ey and said: "Big Injun me, I sla the bul buffler and cook him in his own greese, and eats him hole!" Then a other Injun, he twisted his mouth and said: "Me heep brave, me Blotter the offle grizzly bare and pol-lish pol-lish his bones with my teeths!" And a othern he squoled like a wild cat and said: "I fetch the ragin terri-dactle terri-dactle in hunder to the plain, and chew his neck til Ime jest sick!' At last the old Cheef he shot of his gun, an smiled wicked, and sed. "The rippin and rorin meggy theorem knows me for his marster, I spile him as he runs and gulleps his smokin blud like Jt wus wisky!" Two wite men wich was a lookin on. one of em said, one wite man did: "Wot dredfle fellers, lets lite out for dear life." But the other wite onan, ihe sed: "No, lets see this thing thro, we wont go til the cloze of the pformance." Then the one wich was a frade he said: "How can they jump up an down so wen they get sech lodes on their stummuckses?" The othern he sed. "He tel you wot makes, coz I have et with em a hundred hun-dred times, an I kanow the nasty wrascles dont eat a blessid vittle xcept jest double handfles of gras hoppers a live, and its their dinners a kickin wich gies em Saint Vitesses dance like any thing!" One time there was one of them kind of Pie Oots in Nevaddy seen a gras hopper a settin on a stone with its feet pulled in, redy to take leave at a moment's notice, and the Injen he smiled a sad, sweet smile, like a hipotamus, and said: "How mournfle to think that critters crit-ters wich is like 2 brothers shud dis- trust one a other jest cos Ime a Injln, wich has red skins, how can I hellup that?" But the gras hopper it wiggled one wlsker, like sayin: "Sech a sentiment does you grate honner, but you mis the pint. It aint so much the culler of yure skin as the uncompien way you have of tuckin it out." Argonaut. o |