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Show TOM FIDDLER'S COLUMN. A fellow that don't know that I'ex.i. IlAHiMSox is 'president of the United States has been discovered at Camp Douglas. It is said that there lives a man in Ogden who is so cross-eyed that he attempted at-tempted to shake hands with a man across the street the other day. We are not responsible for the following: fol-lowing: "Mary had a stocking once,' and it was made of wool, and on the Merry Christmas morn .that stocking it was full. How came that stocking to be fully Ilecause at Christmas dawn. when Mary rose and dressed herself, she put that stocking on." A resident of Provo, a few days ago. found the following note which a young lady wrote her beau and which he lost o,i the street: "Dear Chawls, Cawnt you come down Sunday ee. Dont disappint me. Cum and wel hae a time and n half, paw and maw wont be to home and il pizin the dawg." . One of the worst cufses of a small place is the fact that so many people devote themsehes so intensely to the consideration of other people's business. busi-ness. The smaller the city aatown the wo.se the curse; and it is one of the best indicitions of a city's growth and prosperity when meddling with other people's affairs grows k-: s and less in Tiieue are seven signs of a good wife. The water-bucket is always full; the slop bucket always empty: there are always matches in the match-sjti'c match-sjti'c s; there is always sugar in the sugar-bowl; the clocks are always right; dinner agrees with the clocks, and she never has to cut across lots to borrow something from a neighbor when she has unexpected company. Always be very slow in signing papers pa-pers that you do not understand, and then ask for a day or two for consideration consid-eration and consultation. AVc believe be-lieve this to be admirable advice, especially es-pecially to women who are beneficiaries benefi-ciaries iti any estate, and whose signatures sig-natures are solicited. Many have signed away their rights tinder pressure' pres-sure' of misrepresentation, - without having any proper comprehension-of what they were doing. A thoughtful exchange very truthfully remarks: UA casual glance at a newspaper will show a list of men who help to build up a town. If you see s good sized live advertisement in the paper 1 iv e-u f i - r.rinciual merchants, and a caru uom cm tTT the small ones, yon used not inquire into the prosperity of the town it's solid. P.ut if you find the most extensive exten-sive merchants not advertising their business, then set it down as a fact those who try to push their business and the town with its interests have a hard time and an uphill journey all the year around.' I xotick one of the Eastern Hein-ocratic Hein-ocratic papers gives vent to its feelings feel-ings as follows: Glory to God in the highest; on earth peace and goad will toward all mankind. The Lor.v be praised and all the nation rejoice, for Ixgalls, the snarling, growling and peace-disturbing element in the senate, sen-ate, has been knocked out slick and clean, and hereafter a man will occupy oc-cupy his seat in that body and represent repre-sent Kansas in a decent and respectable respect-able manner. Ixgalls was smart enough, perhaps, but he was most devilish mean. The people of that commonwealth are to be congratulated congratu-lated upon the good that the farmers alliance has already done their state by making this change. |