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Show WeekendDiversions Page 6 Comedian coming to USU Arts • Entertainment • Outdoors • Culture enues BY DAVID BAKER assistant sports editor Getting laid off was the best thing to ever happen to Ryan Hamilton. Well, at least for his comedy career. "I started really pushing for comedy while I was looking for another job, and I started to get offered paid work as a comedian," he said. "So, I started taking that, and I kind of never found another job, and it's been about five years now." After Hamilton was laid off from his job doing public relations for an ad agency, he had time to pursue his comedy career -something he was already doing at night. "I kind of fell into it." Hamilton said."... 1 always doing it as a hobby, and then it kind H See HAMILTON, page 7 Friday, Sept. 14, 2007 Steppin' Out This Weekend Friday, Sept. 14 -Project Bandaloop: modern dance meets rapelling, Ellen Eccles Theatre, 7:30 p.m. Fri. and Sat., $19-31,752-0026 -Singer-songwriter John Gorka, Eccles Conference Center, 7:30 p.m., $15 in advance, $18 at the door, www. bridge rfolk.org -"The Man of La Mancha", Heritage Community Theatre, 2505 S. Highway 89, Brigham City, 7:30 p.m. Fri. and Sat., $8, (435) 723-8392 -"7 Year Itch", Utah Theatre, 18 W Center Street, 7:00 p.m. and 9:30 p.m. Fri. and Sat., 4:00 p.m. Sat., $5, 752-3072 -"A Midsummer Night's Dream", Empress Theatre, 9104 W. 2700 S., Magna, 7:00 p.m. Fri. and Sat., 1:00 p.m. Sat., $9 for students, $6 for matinees, 801-347-7373 Saturday, Sept. 15 -Comedians Ryan Hamilton and Bengt Washburn, TSC Ballroom, 7:30 p.m.. $5 -Top of Utah Marathon and 5K, Hardware Ranch to Merlin Olsen Park, 7:00 a.m., $25, Register at Al's Sporting Goods or at www.toporutahmarathon.com -Demolition Derby, Logan Cache Fairgrounds, 400 S. 500 W., 7:00 p.m., $8 adults $4 children -Big Band Swing Dancing, Elite Hall, 83 W. Main, Hyrum, 7:30 p.m. lessons, 8:30 p.m. dancing, $1 lessons, $3 dancing -Ice Skating, Eccles Ice Center, 2825 N. 200 E., Fri. and Sat. 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. and 6:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m., $4 LAST COMIC STANDING PARTICIPANT, Ryan Hamilton, says he just kind of fell into his comedy career. He is coming to USU Saturday. photo courtesy Ryan Hamilton IN THEATRES SEPT 14 TH Want something posted on VENUES? Send to statesman(a)cc.usu.edu Information compiled by: Kate Rouse Facebook made me do it RETURN WTH HONOR A jl«Bt ^' M I SSIO NA R Y HO M E CO M I N G , ... , - ^ Excel \ v u w.rcl urnw i t l i h o n o r m t n K M n m WALKER 6 - PERRY STADIUM 8 - PROVIDENCE Earl's Hobby Hanger 166 West 1200 South Logan, Utah 84321 (435)752-4401 • Lowest prices and largest selection on wood, plastics and small-scale models. • Find everything you need for Landscape Architecture projects! V anks to Facebook, and my so-called friends, I'm now an e-alcoholic. Wait, wait, wait, you say. Well, explain, I will. Anyone who has Facebook has been bombarded by an absurd amount of preposterous applications involving such heinous things as rate and compare your friends; become a vampire, zombie, pirate, ninja, jedi or sith; poke your friends or send your friends e-drinks. It's akih to the amount of religious propaganda being spewed upon those timidly making the trek from the Quad to the Taggart Student Center. Except, at least, the Facebook applications involve drinking, and, as far as I know, don't determine my eternal damnation. At least they don't have that application yet. But, why not focus on the fun part - the drinking, and the eventual e-alcoholism it facilitated? I guess it all started, like most drinking experiences, by peer pressure. Or it could have been that there were beers and whiskey drinks suddenly appearing on my Facebook page, as if they were manna from heaven. But I can't remember the details because I'm too e-drunk at the moment. They look so innocuous, just a small glass of beer, a small, urine-colored whiskey sour with a little maraschino cherry or a Long Island iced tea. It's all OK. Until one Wednesday night when you decide to drink all your e-drinks at once and then go out and cruise the net and get an e-DUl and end up in the e-drunk tank with other irresponsible surfers. I know that's ridiculous, but it's not as ridiculous as the concept of sending drinks to your friend over the Internet. If you are my friend - or even if you aren't, I don't care - and want to buy me a drink, just buy me a regular-ass drink. Last time I checked, an e-beer tastes pretty skunky and isn't ever really cold enough to be refreshing. But if you are looking, here's a with list of quality products 1 would accept: Coors Light, Bud Lignt, Miller Lite, regular Budweiser, MGD, Coors Original - or if you want to be even cheaper - Pabst, Miller High Life, Busch Light, Natural Light, Bud Dry, Steel Reserve, Old English, Old Milwaukee, Olympia, Hamm's or Canadian Host - in the plastic, drunk-proof bottle, please. Another thing that troubles me with this whole e-drinking is when it will eventually lead to e-vomiting or e-hooking-up-with-people-uglier-or-fatter-tnan-you. If Facebook is going to oe in the e-drinking business, they might as well do it right. First, I'd say we nix the e-vomiting idea. Let's just put a positive image of drinking out there - one with no projectile, reverse digestion - because that's the opinion of drinking we'd want young, impressionable kids to get - no consequences here kids. Without e-vorniting, we're left with the hooking-up-with-uglier-or-fatter-people-than-youafter-a-night-ot-e-drinking application. I'm not sure how it would work out, but first you'd have to find someone who actually remembers one of these real-life encounters, and pick their hazy, alcohol-addled memory for the gory details. Then, the next logical step would be the awkward-morning-after application. This is where you can invite your friends - who have a Mack truck spinning brodies in their head after their efifth of Jack - to wake up to an e-version of you. Maybe that's where the e-vomiting should come in. Here's a better idea, instead, you could pick someone for your e-friends to e-wake up next to. All my friends would get celebrities, like Rosie O'Donnell, Gary Busey, RuPaul, Crispin Glover or Mia Sara - wait, I'd love to wake up next to her, scratch that one and put in Charlize Theron from "Monster." [ I See FACEBOOK, page 14 • Now renting & selling paintball gear! Zoo: Employees love their animals • camo, masks • 4500 psi filtered air pumps • CO2 refills \3 continuedfrom page 6 is the least favorite part of his day. Cleaning up animal poop is not all that fun either, he said. "A lot of the things we have to do are sad, and we shouldn't have to do them," Wilhelm said. Got the girl? Get the ring. Jne Diamond Saileri your (^mc/aqemoni Jsf/nq (Jpec/a//s/ 45 North Main, Logan (NPXI lo (ho Persian Peacock) 435 753-4870 30% off to USU Students Tree men's ring vvilh engagement ring purchase. The zoo staff consists of a full-time education coordinator, two full-time keepers, part-time people that help with ship work, security personnel, part-timers that help on weekends and a few volunteers. Between the handful of employees, they share responsibilities of plumbing, electrical, concrete, construction, lawn mowing, snow removal and whatever other maintenance jobs need to be done. Willow Park Zoo is funded by the city, county, state and admission gate. "The state funds Hogle Zoo at a certain dollar amount and we get a very small percentage of that being the only other official zoo in the state," Wilhelm said. "So it sort of comes in the form of a contract grant with the city then runs the place for the state on that contract. The state doesn't want to be in the zoo business, but they decided to fund the zoo that way. So there is the gate money and state money, then the city and county pick up the remainder of that balance of our budget." Wilhelm said the entrance fee is somewhat voluntary. "We put up a sign that it is an admission. It used to say suggested donation, but because we are struggling to try and stay afloat, the government entities that support us continue to say we need to be more self-sufficient. We changed the sign a couple years ago to say admission, and we changed it last year to say one dollar for adults and 50 cents for kids," Wilhelm said. When asked what his favorite animal is at the zoo, Wilhelm said, "There's just too many. Each animal has their own personality and some are more difficult than others. For example, the bull elk is extremely dangerous right now and doesn't care what he hits." Kallmeyer said interacting with the animals makes his job worth it. "Rod makes fun of me for talking to them," Kallmeyer said. The zoo covers about 10 acres l and is located at 416 W. 700 South in Logan. It is open from 9 a.m. to sunset ever)' day of the year except Thanksgiving, ; Christmas and New Year's Day. -T, Dixon@aggiemail. usu.edu |