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Show THE DIXIE SUN FOUR The Call Em There this one about the traveling salesman who car broke down on a country road. Walking to the nearest farmhouse, he knocked on the door and asked the farmer if he could have a room for the night. Sure, said the farmer, but youll Son! have to sleep with my son. Grea exclaimed the salesman. morc'ful heavens, Im in the wrong p-- ! ! Once again we take pen in hand nose in foot, and attempt to ee' out a thought of two for the Cal' Em. That reminds me I promir I wouldnt tell you folks, but thr Die' temptation is you know that Johnnys wifes brother is expecting? Yes, and dc vou know what hes expecting? over-powerin- Well, ask Mr. Woodbury! Incidentally, speaking of Mr. Woodbury, I happen to know that he knows a very gay joke at least I presume its gay. The boys he told were intensely amused. Say, did you hear what happened to Ar Hafen on the deer hunt? Well Arlen was up Bull Creek where the bucks come bigger and better than anywhere else in Utah. Very early the first morning of the hunt, Arlen walked a few yards from camp and spotted a magnificent buck all posed and ready for the shot. So Ar shot! One bullet and the buck was down. Quickly Ar ran to the huge creature and clamped his deer tag firmly into the proper place. SurThe deer was up and on its prise way again. Just a slight oversight Ar had forgotten to slit its throat Now began the big chase Ar and he deer The deer running for its life, Ar to retrieve his deer tag! Suddenly a shot rang out, bu not from Ars eun. Across the stood Jeff Holland. He was tfw man who bpd downed the prize. A few long strides brought him to tho buck. Out came his hunting knife Slit! went the knife dead lay the deer. Hey, yelled Arlen. Thats my deer! Your deer? But I shot it! ! ! gul-le- See here! yelled Ar Heres my Stop In For Expert, Economical Watch Repair, and for All Your Jewelry Needs. Dixie Jewel Shop Students Come in and get acquainted. THELMA'S 40 North Main Back to school clothes Jantzen Tenna Paige Candy Jrs. Campus Casuals deer tag. tell-tal- e tag. and he pointed Real Dixieites 'to the How at Dixie Well, Ill be a ?'.y2!y4! (Continued from Page 1) (dirty bird), said Jeff. You can have your ol deer. Anyone whos fast enough Keith Rogers, a Dixie alumnus, who to keep up with a deer, and tag it sold him on the idea of coming to while hes running, deserves some-hin- Dixie, And, says Joe, five telephone calls and a week later here Let us take this space to firmly I was. state that there is no truth to the likes it at Dixie rumor that Gary Cooper has agreed JoeAsked how he I like it fine; the replied, 0 stay on at Dixie to assist Mr. longer I stay, the better I like it. Valenzuela in teaching Dixie reminds me of Texas only lance. its hotter there; but the people Psychoanalysis Department (or) here are like the people in Texas Chat A Day Keeps The Neurosis friendly and nice. way. Joe plays any position on the What the Psychoanalyst heard . line, and fullback if necessary; obI think my guilty feeling stems viously, a good man to have around. 'rom the time I was a boy scout. I Mike Brenner, a halfback, hails ried to help a little old lady across he street; we were both hit by a from Charleston, S. C. It was Douglas Pearce, a Dixie graduate and car. LDS who converted Recent worlds series sports note Mike missionary, to the LDS faith, and per. . . It looks like itll take the suaded him to come here to school. Rebels to beat the Yankees. Mike was born in Miami, but Maybe I shouldnt keep bringing has lived most of his life in Fla., Georgia. back the subject of Mr. Woodbury, When asked how Dixie to but Rose Mary had this to say one him, Mike said, I like appealed the school, so not evening long ago: its a good one, and the kids are Mr. Woodbury, if you ever try all friendly. But I do get a bit loneshort-sheto our beds again, Im ly at times; Im 2900 miles from going to take this hot iron and home. I miss the ocean and the chase you down the elevator!!! swimming there, and also the (Dont get any wrong ideas; it rice and cotton plantation wasnt really Mr. Woodburys fault. where I lived. But things are workHow would you like to ride all the out for me. ing way to Ogden and back with six Mike has had four years of high gigglv girls? John, Jim, and Mr. Woodbury lived it! If you dont be- school football, three of them in lieve me, ask them On second Georgia, and one in South Carolina. thought dont! A. Karl Larsen, the fourth memWife to her husband one morn- ber of Real Dixie, is Real Dixie ing: Why couldnt you sleep last through direct descent and Real Dixie St. George Dixie, that is night? Because the window from pure love. Bom at WashingHusband: ton. Utah, Mr. Larson naturally atshades were up. Wife: Why didnt you pull them tended high school at St. George. He graduated from Dixie College, down? and then from the BYU with an Husband: Because they were AB degree in 1922. In 1926 he reacross the street. ceived his masters degree from the And in closing, may we impress BYU. He was married to Katharine upon you this very good sugges- Miles in 1928. tion: A very versatile person, Mr. LarThis is National Park and Recrea- son has taught music, art, English, tion Week. This week, park and and history. Hurricane, Washington, have some recreation! Woodward, and Dixie College have served as his teaching homes. Bye now Since he is a devotee of history, his recent book, Red Hills of November, the biography of Utahs cotton town, came as no surprise. Are you a sufferer of persecution It was published in 1958, the year for sound scientific principles? Washington, which was its subject, For the illiterate (the common held its Centennial celebration. Preherd), persecution means unjust viously Mr. Larson had written rebukes for your praiseworthy and gin River Basin as his masters unshakably' firm beliefs against Agricultural Pioneering in the overworking your gray cells. If you are one of these unfortunates, you have three alternatives: 1. You can obliterate your tormentors by some sort of slow torture. 2. You can become a lowly grease blotch on the pages of history. But if this upsets you unnecessarily, (and it will), you may 3. Join the Wadus (Cool Wadus), a degenerate form of the Beet generation which consists mostly of corn, cabbage, peas, beans, onions, squash, potatoes, etc. These vegetable Dixieites in sist on smoking nothing in their pipes and drinking themselves into oblivion on cool wadu. For more information, write to Martvr's Anonymous. or contact the local wadu recruiting service My husband said to vote in care of this paper. for our pocketbook but I Signed dont see it listed here! Assorted Imbeciles g. creative . et ! ! ! ! October 24, 1958 j SPORTS FAN By Stan Allen , SUCCESS IN ATHLETICS, success in any sport or professio-- ' is a frame of mind. More player; fail mentally than physically. Th' boy who acquires a proper menu, attitude toward the game, and, along with it, realizes that mo;j successful ball players are made not born, will be on the road It success and should have no diffi culty in becoming reasonably adep-athis great program. The road to development of one: best self is not easy. But it is espe ' daily difficult for the boy whe thinks success can be attained b; or some hocus-pocu- s ouija board method. If a boy is willing to work both physically and mentally, and will give the various sug gestions which he gets an hones; try, he will develop his talents to high degree, and have the time of his life doing it. He must resolve to be honest with himself and pursue his course to the very end if he hopes to acquire mental attitudes that will prove beneficial, both in sports, and life. The payoff in athletics goes to the boy who aspires to be outstanding and does not overlook any detail that contributes to success. He pays speciaL attention to weaknesses, keeps an open mind, and tests especially those ideas he inclined to doubt. Failure is the lot of the boy who thinks he knows all the answers, while success comes to the boy who is inclined to listen to wise counsel. a is I Study in style with a torola portable model dio. At prices students afford. Mo-- j ra-- J can E. B. Snow Furniture Co. Gather ye Rosebuds fil; Neighbors Lovely larger diamonds . --. distinctive stylings . . . attractively low prices on the Keepsake of your choice. McArthur Jewelers |