| Show 2: COMMENTARY The Salt Lake Tribune It's Tough to Raise Child as Single Mother But Impossible Without I Al3 Thursday September 24 1992 To Purify a Party and the Country Self-Respe- ct do r41116c By Cathy Horyn FOR THE WASHINGTON I POST rve never been sure whether Murphy WASHINGTON — Brown stood for single mothers or whether Dan Quayle by turning a sitcom into an object lesson opposed them In any case I now see that they deserve each other What might have been a vigorous speech about the "poverty of values" has since become a springboard for moral indignation and what might have been a memorable episode about the birth of a child has turned out to be nothing less than a ratings bonanza Clearly the vice president and the producers of "Murphy Brown" which began a new season Monday night with "The Baby" have hit upon the exploitable: each other In the meantime the millions of women who raise their children alone and who potentially had the most to gain by this unexpected attention can now look forward to at least two more months of running gag lines I suppose most of us who decide to have children without benefit of matrimony understand the consequences On more than one occasion I have found myself sitting by the side of a pool watching my son play with someone else's child only to be asked by that same parent whom I barely know if I had considered having an abortion To be cast as a careless person a victim of circumstance is not a role I am familiar with Nor do I understand the peculiar frame of mind that would allow another woman to think that my reasons for having a child were somehow different than hers simply because she got married and I did not But aside from a dislocating sense of embarrassment — I've always wondered why women choose pools and snack bars to ask me why I didn't get married — I am rarely offended by such questions But then I rarely explain You see I never wanted my life to beçome a classification a segue into some inevitable discussion about "lifestyle choices" and "new age families" That is not why I had Jacob I had him because I loved his father It is as simple and as complicated as that Of course I wish I could tell you that things worked out differently between us but they did not and as much as the vice president would like us to believe that families are better than families I think that is not the way life goes Nor am I looking to Murphy Brown to shed any light on single motherhood To paraphrase Joan Didion I am not going down this road to see life reduced to a sitcom Even before his father left long before I actually heard the scrape of gravel in the road I knew that Jacob would be mine alone and that we would be better for it Our life is divisible by two and circumscribed by love and if I can't quite explain all the reasons for what I did understand that it is sometimes difficult to raise a child alone but impossible without The choice one makes to stay or leave follow or move on almost always involves a sacrifice too great to compromise and probably too personal to be trusted in someone else's hands I know that a lot of women have given up careers to raise families and often are quite happy to do so but this is not what I mean There are many more women who do not have brilliant careers to give up who may or may not have chosen the best men but in any case do not feel compelled to stay with them I am talking about two-pare- one-pare- nt nt self-respe- ct self-respe- ct When my son was born I lived in a house between two cornfields at the end of a country road and when I look back at what must have seemed to my parents a tenuous existence I think I have rarely seen things as clearly as I did then There was a rhythm and pattern to those days that I have not been able to duplicate since a kind of peacefulness and sense of purpose that comes from spending hours alone with a baby and from knowing I suspect that this was the life I had chosen and not merely consented to Isn't that what a parent wants most for her child? To inherit not only her eyes and nose but also her courage? This is what Dan Quayle failed to grasp when he went to San Francisco in May and sat down with a group of welfare mothers and told them: "Look around the table today where are the men? These men have a responsibility too" Here were a dozen women who had enough and determination not to wait for some man to turn up and be responsible and all the vice president could say was: "Where are the men?" For him to suggest that those women are somehow to blame for the disappearance of male role models is to deny them their and in effect to tell them that their model of individual responsibility society's is not a factor highest principle in their children's lives I don't know those mothers but I would never assume that they want anything less for their children than I want for Jacob I am not raising him in the absence of a father I am raising him in the presence of our life together I suppose the producers of "Murphy Brown" will find endless ways of pinning diapers on backward and juggling feedings with Murphy's interviews I don t expect ever to see a segment showing Murphy buying a birthday card so her son will give it to her on her birthday or hear anyone tell her at the end of the day she's done a good job I think this is not the way life goes Nor do I ever expect Dan Quayle to understand that society does not condone single mothers It ignores them by treating them as a social disorder somewhere below widows and divorcees and then if that's not enough punishes them by electing politicians who threaten to withhold welfare checks to those who need it the most This is no joke self-respe- ct self-respe- high-profil- e Cathy Horyn writes for The Washington Post's Style section The Public Forum Tribtme Readers' Opinions Sci-t- i at TCI In August a sales representative of TCI Cablevision came to my door and asked if I would like to become a cable subscriber As I am a science fiction fan I inquired if TCI planned to offer the new i Channel which premieres Se pt 24 He replied "We're working on it" I took this to mean that TCI was actively pursuing making this channel available to TCI subscribers I agreed to sign up as a cable subscriber However a recent phone call by me to the TCI office revealed that no they have no plans whatsoever to carry the i Channel and were not attempting to make it available In this light their sales tactics could be viewed as deceptive Though I am reluctant to continue doing business with TCI after this experience I will if they make this channel available at some point in the future TCI informs me that science fiction fans may petition the decision not to carry the channel by sending TCI a letter asking for the channel I request any and all science fiction fans to please do so PAUL E MARTZ Salt Lake City I 1 Sci-F- 3 ) t I t Sci-F- t i 1 ) Pay to Play I don't think that the new fee waiver mandated by the Third District Court is the solution to our student' finaticial problems This court order does not represent the student body as a whole Students who aren't rich enough to play football and be a cheerleader can still get waivers for the bare necessities such as books school lunch and activities (games field trips etc) Those students who can afford such activities as cheerleading and sports should not be forced to quit these activities because someone else can't afford it and the school can't provide for them Before at least some of the students got opportunities but now the group as a whole may not be able to do these activities any more 'Dere are always other ways of dealing with these problems If a student really wanted to be a cheerleader he or she could always find a sponsor It is hard finding one but that way at least he or she could be one Sometimes life is unfair and we can't have all that we want but those who can afford to have the opportunities should be able to have them MARY BRAGG Salt Lake City L 1PNIkleilm n: 4- Chris 4 I - r" Matthews 111 li 11a l' t CHICAGO TRIBUNE !I'll Ht' 1 141 I 1 SERVICE WASHINGTON — Thanks to ‘ "Murphy Brown" American liberals have just relished their first good laugh in 50 years Not since Tom Dewey's Republicans attacked Franklin Roosevelt's dog Fala back in 1944 has the country witnessed so lethal a boomerang But the whole hilarious episode raises an obvious question: Why does the GOP keep doing this to itself? Why does it keep fighting this culture war? Why with the US economy stuttering Europe in turmoil and Africa sinking horribly before us does the party of the New World Order direct its campaign firepower to a topic and i A I 44 — 7 i ' t ''! 4 ' t' I I : iiii 1'' ' t' ' &' 11 ': I ' !to ' - - - I i : 4 - i - ' t' -- a ft4 11 '4Erkii t I! I'd 1 7i 13 II Hope Ark and Al Gore of Carthage Tenn The Republicans will probably be no luckier at this pair than Dan Quayle was villainizing Edgar Bergen's charmed daughter Candice Just as she is no Jane Fonda Clinton and Gore could hardly be confused with Marx and Lenin They are after all both Southern Baptists both men who went home after finishing school and have held fast to their roots in the American heartland But this is exactly the problem Just because a good ol boy like Bill Clinton or a senator's son like Al Gore are immune to the process is hardly reason for comfort Whatever happens on Nov 3 this ugly campaign to separate Americans between "us" and "them" is gathering momentum Much of the -- family values" rhetoric we heard in Houston last month was a flagrant plea to the religious right whose goal we dare not overlook is not to unite a people but to "purify" a party and after that a country con- tamination "Hollywood" George Bush is playing the same card Last week in Enid Okla he blasted Democrat Bill Clinton with the same cultural assault rifle he used with such deadly force on Mike Dukakis in 88 The "motive" behind Clinton's economic program could be traced he suggested darkly to the ideas of socialist and communist Europe He accused Clinton of "reviving big government theories" once dominant in -Warsaw- and -- Prague" and "Moscow" "My opponent is drawn to these views" Bush told the cheering crowd Why? Because "he and a number of his advisers studied them at Oxford in the 1960s" With the Clinton-Gorticket well ahead in the polls the temptation is to ignore this stuff enjoy the laugh relish the ridicule and chalk it up to desperate campaigning That may be smart tactics Ifs hard to find a national ticket as homegrown as Bill Clinton of Greek-America- n t—- 1:f ntP9110111 city of suspected cultural Know-Nothin- I( i A - 1111111111111 People magazine? Finally why having taken his lumps Monday night did a stricken Vice President Dan Quayle emerge on the 11 o'clock news like a deer caught in the headlights reciting once again his scripted rejoinder that "Hollywood still doesn't get it"? One reason: It's worked before George Bush won the presidency in 1988 we keep forgetrival ting by Michael Dukakis The Massachusetts governor had refused to sign legislation fining teachers for not reciting the Pledge of Allegiance This was all the material George Bush needed to stitch the flag patriotism and the Pledge into the Democrat& funeral shroud Bush was the real American: Dukakis was not This attempt to alienize the other side didn't start with this one Neither did it end there Back in 1964 the Republican presidential candidate wowed the right with his call to cut that celebrated melting pot New York off from the rest of the country And here in 1992 Dan Quayle leads the GOP right in shelling that other coastal : ' - 14 target usually reserved for first-generatio- n ? 111-J- g e Death Sentence Where to Write When submitting letters to the Public Forum please include your full name signature address and daytime telephone numbers Information other than your name will be kept confidential Preference is given to original letters of 300 words or less that are typewritten double-- and spaced pernit publica- tion of the writer's true name (Names may be withheld for good reason) All letters are sub ject to editing Mail to Public The Salt Lake Tribune PO Box 867 Salt Lake City Utah 84110 RI-ru- m Primitive Conception In her letter "People First" (Forum Sept 5) Bonnie Robertson states that "it is high time we stand up against these animal rights activists and keep them from taking our basic rights and freedoms away" I am curious as to what she means by "basic rights" and "freedoms" In a constitutional sense freedom is understood as the individual's right to behave as he or she chooses so long as these actions do not infringe upon the rights of others Since Ms Robertson anactivists grily cites animal-right- s with ruining the mink industry and attacking rodeos hound hunting etc it seems clear that either she must consider these particular examples not to violate animals' rights or she doesn't consider an animal's own interest even worth considering I believe animals' interests to be worth taking into account when our actions involve them Since neither minks rodeos or hound hunting are necessary for fulfilling vital human needs it makes me wonder how we can so heedlessly violate an animal's basic interest for the sake of our interests in entertainment and luxury It may be convenient to perceive and make use of animals in terms of pure utility in the same way America's early settlers viewed blacks as slave holdings But this primitive conception of animals existing solely for us is arbitrary and We're animal too The myopia of putting people first is pathetic pandering for the sake of putting one species over those that are powerless This primitive conception of humanity's role an our planet is what has trashed our world ALF SEFGERT Salt Lake City 1 The opposition to explicit sex education in the public schools and the view that all important sex education must take place in the home levies a death sentence on those children who do not receive adequate education either in school or at home The increase in AIDS is highest s among Refusal to provide such education is reminiscent of the reaction of religious fundamentalists to the search for the cause and cure of syphilis in the 19th century as sinful People with syphilis deserved to die because they had sinned It seems to me that the thinking of conservatives who now control public policy regarding sex education is hardly any different from that prevalent in the 19th century If you don't happen to live in an "ideal" family or don't receive the education you need then you deserve to die How much fuzzy talk do we have to put up with before we get it straight? JACK H PETAJAN MD Professor of Neurology University of Utah Salt Lake City EN L11:1 & SUITS : SALE - ' '229" ' - : CASHMERE BLEND : 4---s- t 4' I : R-- REG $365 I ''''ie '249" i - I I ' - - - k ' ist t' z 1 - :! i- i1 - t :-t k A LINED TO THE KNEE :: REG $125 Ai T$1 ttr:i I4 GABARDINE SLACKS 2t'-- 7' :$ SALE '74" I IMPORTED SILK NECKWEAR :41' - -- st: eft :k — 4-6- t :4--: te actit44i 4: ' - -- 3'' - k ' 7 t47:-- 9 -' pr- 4 - - A vt D l::- ' 4 LiF:: "- - t- - SALE $14" 2::::a 7i-Js- : 11 REG $30 A - i 4 l'c' :s'i“' i- ALL WOOL - s z : r i tt:- - 4 : SPORTCOATS SALE ' ' - i REG $350 d Murray s- SINGLE BREASTED rs BRIAN TRIPTOW 71191111:11i11:1:: I ALL WOOL Hunting Instincts Anti-hunte- P071A 0A teen-ager- Fall is in the air and hunting season is upon us once again dread seeing those killers of innocent orange-claanimals every fall They object to the fact that hunters actually find enjoyment in killing animals yet they fail to see the reasons for hunting Animals are dying all around us with no apparent uproar Fish are dying in Cleveland reservoir because farmers want to grow food the Humane Society is rounding up domestic animals and killing them for the sake of population control Human conflict with bears is occurring at a seemingly unprecedented rate The body count from automobile collisions with deer is always double digits The Humane Society identified the need for population control of domestic animals Why do the animal lovers fail to see the same logic applied to wild animals? It is because they resent enjoyment of hunting I am afraid that they are too caught up in the urban technocracy to acknowledge the inherent instincts we all have when it comes to participating in nature rather than just being an ©11:1 - ' JD ' 1" t PERFECT BLEND OF FASHION I VALUE & QUALITY 11 o 11 32 West 200 South SLC UL 84101 colt g"ge Vee°04!61---Major Credit Cards Accepted '444 Free Validated Parking 10 531E0777 - am-- 6 pm ii I |
