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Show Supplement To The Green Sheet West, West Valley View, Murray Eagle, The Green Sheet East Thursday, Feb. f f f 23, 1984 ? I rT k i i I 5 r Once Upon A Time . hoping and dreaming. The reality is now, and all your childhood and girlhood dreams will be real. The time of fulfillment. Fes, once upon a time you had a dream, a wonderful dream of the day you would be a beautiful bride, lovely bride, and, at long last, that day has arrived. A day youve dreamed of since you were a little girl. The moment youve fantacized about as a teenager. An event in which youve pictured yourself in the place of every girl youve watched in movies or TV wedding scenes. This is the day youve planned for ever since that day you looked into the eyes of that special young man and knew . . . maybe long before he did . . . that someday the two of you would wed. at long lest the day of your So wedding has arrived. Now at last there will be no more frantic planning of dates so you can be together, no more hurrying through classes to meet at some lunch room. No . . . now you will be together day in and day out. Hea ven ! Hea ven on earth ! Yes, all this is true and you know this will be the end to your wishing, A f ii I i clean. Beds were made, furniture dusted, the evenings confusion of papers and magazines put in place. And now theres no one but you to do it. Thats not only what you hope, it's what you expect. What else? Youre in love. But cruel as it sounds, it doesnt just happen. It takes two realistic minds and a lot of planning together to make it real. Youre going to be together a day. Well, take out a few hours for school or work, but, other than that, youre together. And you cant wait. But heres where your wisdom of planning and talking things over will save future bewilderment, frustration and tears for later on. You will find that suddenly there are dozens of responsibilities to take care of that your mother so effortlessly, it seemed . . . once did. And you didnt even know she was doing them. Dishes were always clean and in the cupboards. Clothes were always ... ... Meals take time You must shop for the food, take care of it after getting it home and then make the meal. The dishes dont do themselves. Beds dont make themselves, either. And dust gathers twice as fast as it should. Where is all that time you were going to have to just sit, gaze at each other and glory in the fact that . . . you are married. Where, oh, where is the time to do shampoo and curl your hair your nails and toes . . . time to make yourself beautiful? Just for him. Whats happened? This is a time that comes to every married couple. A time when the dreams of youth must meet and shake hands with the reality of life. And it doesn t come easy. No doubt . . .unless youre quite exceptional . . . you both have jobs. ... . if you both contribute to the income, both of you should share in the work and upkeep of the home. So, It can work like this. Perhaps he likes to shop. It could be a challenge to him to find bargains and then plan the meals to go with his buys. Let him. And dont complain or try to direct him. It will not only add to the sharing of the marriage, but this is how he will learn how much it costs to eat, and how the cost of impulse buying and snack foods add to the cost of the food bill. Or, perhaps with his basic army training behind him, or his experience of living in one room at college, he has learned to police his surroundings and make the beds. Tidying up may be a breeze to him. Let him take that responsibility. There ll be plenty for you to do. Talk these things over before you trade your vows. Afterwards its too easy to get into a rut and suddenly find you have all the household chores on your hands as well as an job. While he watches the evening TV programs. If there are differences In what . you expect from each other as husband and wife find out and discuss the differences whde you are making the wedding plans. Most couples today share not only their life together but the work of living together. Husbands no longer feel demeaned if caught pushing the vacuum, cookmg a meal or cleaning up after a meal. And many a wife likes to cut the lawn while her husband is busy in the kitchen. There are no longer any his jobs or her jobs, and its wonderful. You can make of your marriage exactly what you want of it and with no guilts if what you do isnt the same as what your parents did. Or your neighbors do. No one cares any more. You are the two who exchange the vows, make the promises and what goes on in your home matters not one bit to anyone else. Make your own lives, share the work . . . share the home upkeep . . . share the planning ... and if you do all this well . . . you will also find time to do as you once dreamed of doing . . . share time with each other. I s L . W A ' 3SW ail k 'Hovk, h'lVM.MHn |