OCR Text |
Show Lifestyle ~TheDaily Herald Secrets of serene potency In all my surveys and interviews, F've found that men over 45 feel LEAST secure about their sexual prowess; almost half of them admit they nolongerfeel the same level of sexual desire. But something else takes its place as they enter Second Adulthood. The need for intimacy and companionship eclipses the importance of sex. Oniy a handful of the Professional Men over 45 I've inter- viewed say they most prize “revi- talized sex.” They now value “intimacy and trust” most in a loving relationship. Consider: All the Professional Men over 45 whoare still in first marriages say that their spouses are now their primary source of intimacy and comfort, all of them 100 percent This chaliengesthe convention- New Passages al excuse that it’s the familianty of the same old wife that deflates a man’s desire and performance. And it’s not about a much younger wife. None of these men is marned to a woman under 35; they are all married to near peers. Men whomakeit through male menopause and do find intimacy and trust with one partner can enjoy an equivalent to post menopausal zest (PMZ) for women; call it SP Serene Potency, It helps if a man knows what to look for An urbane investment banker described to me his bafflement at how the direcnion of his sexual es changed dramatically in is 50s. He was divorcedand con: ntly invited to parties as a highly eligible bachelor-around-tow T didn’t feel like chasing women anymore. [t wasn't a nat ural instinet, the way it was whea | was younger. But I felt like I SHOULD chase women. They expectedit “This may sound sappy,” he added. “Whati discovered was, as ! got older, sex for its own sake wasn't muchfun. But sex as a way of express! love, that is. sublime.” In our secular culture sexuality often replaces religion as a means of pursuing the meaning oflife But as the late author Ernest Becker reminded us in “The Denial of Death.” “sex is of the body. andthe body is of death.” Therefore, when relying upon the sex act as the bottomless well of continually renewed strength, a man sets himself an impossible standard: perpetual virility Robert White, anelectrical contractor | interviewed in Florida, was conditioned tothe standard of perpetual virility. But beneath the ngid behavior codes of his working-class upbringing were hidden the longings of a man both gentle and cerebral by nature. Divorced in middlelife, he met a woman wholectures on mira cles, Robert readily acknowledges it was she whoreleased the ten derness in his soul and freed him from his total preoccupation with technical performance on the job and in bed. Menin Second Adulthood who still find meaning in their work or develop passionate interests or hobbies, who also expand theinti- macy in their marriages, and who invest in their physical health and strength, seldom have potency problems. A successful New York surgeon, the guru to many younger doctors, retired in his 70s “Just watch, he'll get depressed and dry up and die,” fretted his family. But the man’s inner vitali- ty carried over into @ passion for Studying history, collecting coins, and playing chess until he became Proficient enough to enter tourna ments, He continued playing tenhis twice a Week to keep his body tuned up. “He never looked back and ever missed a beat.” says his admiring son-in-law * * : Wednesday, May 22,1996| Ex-model fighting to ban abortion in France Editor's note: France hasnt seen the violence that sometimes accompanies antiabortion campaigns gainst the amendment In 1993, Parliament passed 2 in the United States. But militants have adopted disruptive tactics developedin America, and the governmenthas responded with a hardline. itated ft Deputies also refused to includ abortion protesters im dh nesty declared for minor cnminal ses to mark President Jacques ection last May 7 have handed de ngly stiffer penalties in a deter the mc sent from By EDUARDO CUE Associated Press Writer PARIS — As a fashion model, Noelia Garcia strutted down runways from Paris to Tokyo and appeared in dozens offashion magazines. Today, after witnessing many of her girlfriends abort unwanted pregnancies, the 22-year-old language student is seen mainly in hospitals and courtrooms as a leader of France's anti-abortion movement She has accumulated 21 months of suspended jail terms and hundreds of thousandsoffrancsin fines overthe past year for taking part in disruptive rallies inside hospitals where abortions are performed. “The death penalty was abolished for criminals in 1982; it has been applied to the innocent since 1975,” she says of the Veil law that legalized abortion in France up to the 10th week of pregnancy Although the militants have been inspired by the determination and demonstrations of American anti-abortion groups, the movement in France has not generated any of the bombings, shootings or arson attacks aimed at U.S. abor tionclinics and their employees But the French government and courts show litte tolerance for anti-abortion “commandos” who raid clinics, chaining themselves together, singing, praying or simply remaining silent. The raiders are promptly arrested whenever they invade abertionclinics. “Our association has found the commandosits best form of action because they are what disturb people most,” Claire Fontana. president of God's Truce, one of the 2g vioient y cases | been | courts, which have ruled t bortion opponents ir case, Even the st of protesters Bas ppeal. To dateg no > ed ume in om zens have recemped su 1 sentences . bortion groups Say° Beir; ate goal is to force Since pliance with the Verh daw"S ons on whea AP Photo Noelia Garcia poses on the banks of the Seine River in Paris in April. As a fashion model, Garcia strutted down runways from Paris to Tokyo and appeared in most radical anti-abortion groups. said in an interview Indeed, they have succeeded in drawing attention to the issue in a society where polls indicate a vast majority believe a woman's right to an abortion takes precedence over any group's moral values The militants say the comman. dos give the fetus another chance at life and force women who have decided to abort to think aboutit Fontana claims 300 women decided not to go through with the operation after a recent raid on an abortion clinic in the southeastern city of Grenoble. Sheoffered no evidenceto back up his claim More than 166,000 legal abor- dozensof fashion magazines. Today, the 22-year-old is seen mainly in hospitals as a leader of France's anti-abortion movement tions were performed in F 1993, thelast ye: cial figures are av A decade 183,000. earlier. there were according to the National Institute of Demographic Studies the real num But experts ber is about 225,000 a year because many clinics and hospitals do not report all the abortions they perform. Critics contend doctors do not count abortions performed on women more than 10 weeks pregnant thelegal limit Despite the publicity, abortion opponents have had no success ir weakening the Veil law Only three of 577 deputies voted for an am i-abor 4 clin that would h tion enco just ¢ Those whx accept that a minority moral v alues on said Sx ety aT d, something Td and doctors are not But the militants’ ultimate). s repeal of the Veil law ‘ Ironically, the biggest.problenr ¢ for French women seeking coat bons ts not the militants, equate abortion io While unwiliumg fo cesteiet a: tions, successive” governments wanted to give thes ession they encourage them. [* In certain regions, womem+ must travel dozens of kilometets miles) to the nearest clinic,” saith Colette Galard, a leader of the French Family Planning Move ment. “It isn’t out of opposition to abortions. but rather because it's simply not a priority Smedleyleaving position | at American Fork Hospital Craig M. Smedley has accept ied new position 4 ss adminis! ator at Intermountain Health € e's Val View Medical Cent in Cedar a Report local hazards on new Hazard Hotline The Utah County Health Department is teaming up with members of the community in pre venting and minimizing uninten tional injures that may occur. If you see a situation that you feel poses a threat to others, health department officials want to know about it An Injury Hazard Hotline has been established to monitor the calls, direct the problems to the night source to correct them and allow the health department to serve as advocates to remedy the hazards. The Hazard Hotline number is 370-8795. When calling, please leave a detailed message describing the hazardandits location. Possible hazards might include unfencedditches, uncovered holes and dangerous public walk ways. The injury problem is t large and too complex and resources too limited for any one group to solve alone. The public has the opportunity to be the eyes and ears of the community by reporting any unsafesituations Ann recommendsreading the ‘Youth and HIV/AIDS”report Dear Readers: | recently received a copy of a report sent to President Clinton titled “Youth and HIV/AIDS.” The report notes that every year between 40,000 and 80.000 Americans become infected with HIV. Approximately half of those infected are under age 25. This means between two and four young people are infected with HIV every hour of every day The report, which was requested by President Clinton and prepared by Patricia Fleming, White House AIDS policy chief, represents a collaboration between the National AIDS Fundand the Until There's a Cure Foundation. It highlights the fact that specific groupsare at greater nisk Knowledge of one’s HIV status can be an important part in pre: venting the spread of AIDS, but too many young people do not Know they are infected unul they have passed the disease along to someone else. The report further points out that although voluntary, confidential HIV testing and counseling would encourage young people to find out if they are intected, there are still barriers that prevent such testing. he report outlines a series of steps that can be taken by the fed- eral government to help increase awareness among young people in this country. It concludes, however, that the government: cannot Advice Columnist ERR resolve these problems onits own All individuals, communities and public and private institutions must be actively committed to combating the spread of HIV among America’s youth. Education is the key 10 preven: tion, | hope thousands of teachers around the country who read this column will send for this report. It should be discussed in the class- rooms. Eighth-graders are not too young to be made aware of it Remember, knowledge is power, and we needall the power we can muster to fight this dreaded disease For a copy of the report, call the National HIV/AIDS Hotline. 800-342-AIDS (TTY 1-800-243 7889), or write to the Centers for Disease Control National AIDS Clearinghouse, P.O. Box 6003 Rockville, Md. 20849-6003 The report canalso be viewedor down loaded from the CDC Nati AIDS Clearinghouse World Wide Website: http://www.cdenac org The old saying, “What y don’t know can’t hurt you, does not hold true when it comes to AIDS prevention. It not only can HURT you, it can KILL Dear Ann Landers: Anothe word about handicapped parking please Not all handicapped people are in wheelchairs, on crutches or using canes. The problem may be multiple sclerosis, lupus, asthma. bronchitis, heart trouble. emphyse ma or cancer. These illnesses are not always obvious. A person may appear to befit but may require handicapped park ing. Likewise, the people who yell at them may appear to be intelli gent Looking Fit and Trying Hard in Detroit Dear Detroit: Thank you on behalf of all the folks who have wanted to write about this but never got around to it. He has beer in IHC’s American F Hospital for > years with his most recent role being that of COO for the THC »spitals in Utah County Lam really looking forwa mov into this new position, one t paTt fits my talents and strengths Valley Vi il has plans to build a ) accommodate a g nity, a situatc was I] years said. “The toughpart is say ¢ good-bye to ssociat Craig M. Smediey Charleston Area Medical Center in Charleston, W. Va. He also held administrative positions at THC's McKay-Dee Hospital Ceftter j Ogden: Forks Community Hospi tal in’ Forks, Wash. and THC’s Sevier Valley Hospital in Ric n primary and care IHC will oversee 4 sive modernization in future Smedley will ensu meets re Communities hea ore than 23 health care ad y's first began in ence Su r held In 1984, Hospital appointed for American Fork Hospitdl. 197 U Fark the Amencan Governing Board Smedley adminsygteg™ a= position he held for 13 MS before accepting County resgnst bilities as COO for the THC Hibspi tals in Utah County Horoscope evolved nat shar your high S ORPIOOxt By JEANE OIXON For May ARIES (March 21-Ap Pi TAURUS A ' han alk with yourself SAGITTARIUS surprising change wil hing. happen both at news > adeniratioon your self-confidence ¥ CAPRICORN (De ike YOU , GEMINI (May nd June 20). 7 CANCER (June 2 Achieving your high aims will mean joining forces with pe LEG wath frends and great diplomacy. Be p: who seems overly naive jection Nurts deeply at First, the w heal much faster than expected. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18 Charity 2 community work will ing you new recogninon Be gencegats your time and mane). Romance cogil you out when you Feast expect it PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): You intw ively sense the best way to accomplish something for people whoare dear to you. Avesd iwitig eimatums to a family mem ber. Increased wealth is linked to an unex DONT STARE AT THE FACE DON'T GAWK AT THE BODY. DON'T LOOK DISAPPOWTED. | DONT APPEAR RELIEVED. | Se by Cathy Guisewite + cf financial backing es overscas. Sold developments on the ] /'3t teetaBUND Date. } travel home front attest to your good planaing. The ITS A BLANK DATE! company of a fiend will make the evening most pleasurable Lina (Sept. 23-Ocr. 22): Getting better organized at work will increase profits A differ ace of opinion does not have to cause ill feel ong. Teamwork is adh ised even if some of those pected strokeof luck |