Show 0 CHIPS AND SPLINTERS notice to old king winter I 1 liepp keep off the crass grass 11 why is it that when a man sits on paint the paint and his trousers are never the same color A cup up of hot water with a piece of dried apple in it is the swell snell thing thins for a morning tonic in new york society A 41 k writer terin in harpers a poem oc with the line some day I 1 shall ae be dedd dead 11 it 11 is indeed a beautiful thought g the small boy who reached up the chimney for another christmas present said lie he found something there that booted him the amount of pin money required by the married woman depends depend on whether she used uses diamond pins or rolling pins r no I 1 she sair sweetly 1 I dont object eject to the smell of a cigar Ws ills illg the smoke I 1 dont ake tike 1 lur zur lington free press the excuse of the milkman cant help it if thill cows are about in the water badr chronicle felegi it Is ia a great deal worse to be bc ocallar a allar llor than to be called one philadelphia record to be called a liar Is 1 i generally the worse for we toe other fellow the new orleans picayune in speaking in of the hand grenade for lor p patting out t fires fines asks for an that will lint pud out a cat when thrown into th logli ai tc yard 5 ard while Y IT a is a na ij from froll home recently lie feil fhil it ila ant ani a I 1 lafed alad iu lil a physic physician lafa laft aft ayt fr c r a long iong examination he advised him hlin to his luns luus 11 A little child of rut and vt becoming wearied wear ledwith with the quarreling of two younger children overa over a glass of milk exclaimed the use of fight ing tug for ever over that milk therra therna theres a whole cowf al in the barn I 1 moses has been annoyed by burglars prowling around his residence one day he be went into a gun shop to buy a revolver wr what kind of a h weapon do you want 1 I should like one said moses mit accommodation for six burglars burglar 1 dick always ays pretended to be familiar with the tastes and habits of the people of the blue grass region n speaking Speak inc inz of the morning it r repast of the Lexington lans ians h he h hus has been heard to say that a aa hex lexington ex breakfast consists braice of wee whisky cocktails and a v chew OS of tobacco no said an arizona campaign orator as be arose to oppose the re nomination of a candidate for county treasurer no I 1 anything to say against the ability of major Sl athers nothing in the world in fact I 1 consider that if anything he has too much ability 11 hows that asked the chairman well you see over at cross dog camp last winter we used to play a good deal of seven up tip the major one of the best fellows in the world had such remarkable luck that the boys hoys got so after a while w hile hiie that they I 1 wo play with him unless ho he had his coat off and his cuffs rolled hack hick 11 the major was scratched traveler |