Show Two world-wid- e news gathering organizations The Associated ' Press and The United Press provide dispatches for this newspaper id " v i t m TIE By RUBE GOLDBERG o o The most genuine thing about "A Merry Christmas" is that we ere required to earn it We must go through the pre - Christmas grind of shopping andcard writing and spending before we can come out into the open and breathe the freecool comforting air of Christmas "day We grab most of our spiritual blessings on the fly We spend a few hours at church or read an uplifting book and feel that we have -- done ample penance for all our- sins - But Christmas doesn't let us off so easy I have spent the last few weeks sleeping in department store windows eating all my meals with floorwalkers and gasping for air in crowded elevators I have ransacked old address books for names of peo ple to whom I might send Christmas cards Some of them are dead and others have moved away I have worked myself into a state f nervous collapse wondering whether my children would like sweaters or tennis rackets or fountain pens I have found out that every present I bought cost exactly twice as much as I expected to pay I have joined the chorus of thousands who struggle with paper and string and Christmas seals groaning "Why all this nonsense?" But thank goodness I have a fairly good memory good food The rations were none too good and the men complained about that a good deal Captain Smith used vile language in addressing the men but he 'did to serve better food order " SAVES HIS LIFE One day there was alight between Carlos the Greek and Blanco a mulatto from Manilla Mate Karsweli seeing the Greek about to plunge a knife into Blanco rushed up and pushed the Greek aside saving Blanco's life at the risk of his own You might think that this act would have gained Karswell the eternal friendship of Blanco Perhaps that was what Karswell thought At any rate Kars well had the watch on deck next night or at three o'clock next morning and when Blanco called to him to show him something strange in the sea beside the ship Karswell walked over beside the seaman and leaned over to see the curiosity As KarsLOVE HAPPINESS well bent over the bulwarks Blanco struck him on I know that on Christmas day I the head will be very glad that -- 1 did all seized himwith a handspike and three other mutineers these things I will see love and Karsweli cried out Early the ship's happiness ell around me I will be boy was lookout on the"Murder!" forecastle head He rushed ef not did my-sI inconvenience sorry --where the mate was to the place being beaten by just a little more I will know Blanco The mutineers just then rushed below to get all the that crowding and worrythe captain ing and grumbling was just our foolish way of discovering that there STRUCK ON HEAD is something higher and greater In awoke Anderson and the Early other words I will know there is a two went back tothe Norwegian mate the was still alive but who Santa Claus badly hurt As Anderson stooped to lift the mate he was struck on the hack of the neck by a handspike There seems to be a sudden wave in the hands of one of the Manilla men and fell of indignation sweeping over the down the poop-laddhalf unconscious country against reckless automobile When Anderson was able to crawl back on deck driving Public officials and psy- he was met by Early and the French! boatswain Can-drea- u chologists are discovering new rea consulted on their course of action They sons for all the growing auto oas- - j realizedThey that stood no chance in the open against ualties Arthur W Magee of New six mulattoes they a Turk all and powerful and they Jersey says December is the most believed the captain to havevery been dangerous month on the road Dr barricaded themselves in the deck-hou- killed So they Sidney J Williams of Chicago says captain had rushed out of hjs cabin when he accidents are caused by epilepsy wasThe awakened by the struggle on deck and had been lack vision of skill end faul- met pood a whole crew of mutineers with knives He by ty attitude Judge Joseph L Call of had been stabbed several times and left for dead Los Angeles punishes drivers who ' Smith the captain's brother stepping out to race through boulevard "stop" signs Georgewas attacked by the men with their bloody by making them wear- - dunce caps help knives He succeeded in gaining the deck and there and write "I will make boulevard with his bare fists fought manfully a times great exethousand stops" cution among the mutineers until doing he to the sank My opinion is that the automobile floor covered with stab wounds itself has become too perfect All you LOCKS HIMSELF IN ' have to do is put your toe on a lit-t- le Taffir the second mate was a sound sleeper He pedal and the car will fly away with the speed and grace of a stag the-coo- through the forest The temptation is too greet for the average human being to withstand I would like to get together with some friends and organize a new automobile company to build cars with faulty engines tires and lights along the lines of those we had in 1902 My slogan would be back -Guaranteed to slow down to a speed of twelve miles an hour whether you like it or not" This! should take care of the problem satisfactorily FEATURES-COMIC- S 42iJmqf- It j t j j f Vincent Van Gogh painting just sold for $15000 During his whole life Van Gogh earned about do!lars from his canvases thirty-fiv- e Van Gogh' will not be able to enjoy any of that fifteen thousand dollars this Christmas Let's try not to leave our Christmas joys to posterity (Copyright 1935 by the McNaught A — Syndicate Inc) — Michael Gets His First Long Trousers BELGRADE — Fourteen-year-ol- d Crown Prince Michael of Rumania has at last been permitted to wear long trousers The to do so was officially signed right Carol and Michael made byhisKing debut in 'baggers" at' his first in socal life of the court appearance in Bucharest immaculate evening dress he was of the royal hosts at a party in iionor of the birthday of Queen Marie his grandmother was not awakened by the murder of the captain and Karswell but when the mutineers began beating the prostrate form of George Smith with capstan bars on the deck above his bunk he awoke and went out to look about It took him" a long time to discover that nearly everybody was dead He then went back to his cabin and locked himself in He spent nearly an hour there alone waiting for his turn Not a pleasant hour perhaps At length the mutineers appeared outside Taffir's cabin and informed him that he was to be spared to navigate the ship and nobody: else could do it Af-- I ter a long parley through the closed door he came out and went on deck He was not molested but was '' told to head lor Buenos Aires-- The mutineers already had compromised with the deckhouse party Candreau was at the wheel The three Chinese were scrubbing the blood off the deck Early and another man Powell were handling the ALLOWED TO LIVE Anderson was allowed to live because one of the mutineers Lyons by name was his friend The Turk and the mulattoes made life miserable for the dour Norwegian by sharpening their knives in his presence and promising to kill him tomorrow Ha:hik accompan- ?TrraL"'ttuvdaZ iwia irom tne station Once or twice in that period the professor missed his regular train home and had to take the next one On the very few occasions when this Hachiko was m a terribly perturbed statehappened of mind! Up and down the station platform he would race scanning each descending passenger and moaning softly to Presently he would settle down to wa t alongside the main doorway until train deposited the professor at the station the later Then yelping in ecstatic delight at this ending of his sad vigil Hachiko would rulh ove? Dr Ueno and hurl himself upon the delayed man and behaye as though the two had been reunited after an absence of years instead of hours It was a pretty sight the joy of the dor at his adored owner's return Folk talked about it One eart interest WOtf about ?SE£E27 ifv ££ yams" — woiumus reputation was growing DOCTOR DIES university Dr Ueno died of body was sent home for burial But Hachiko could not understand The box carried from the train seemed to him to lone no have connection at all with the living and loving master whose homecoming he was awaiting The dead professor's widow did all she could for the comfort and welfare of the terrier But it was not enough True Hachiko would spend his nights at home But every morning he would trot off to the Shibuya railroad station- -- S Column Jolb Vv CHANGES HIS MIND The cook changed his mind and rushing on deck begged to be taken along The boat's crew sent back a mocking farewell and the Chinaman climbed higher and higher into the rigging as the Flowery Land settled into the deep water He was last seen clinging to the very tip of the maintopmast as the vessel disappeared Late that day the two boatloads of men with their packs and provisions reached a lonely shore The honest men were told to tell a certain story upon which the mutineers had agreed They were the shipwrecked crew of a guano freighter from Peru which had foundered The tale further embroidered seemd ed a good one to the mutineers who were all extremely ignorant It was a tale that no seafaring person would have swallowed As evidence of the moron minds of the mutineers they had carefully divided among them and packed away from the ship with them several bagf uls of brass disks that they believed to be gold coins These disks were made for some special use to take the place of coins as we use metal tokens for trolley fares in many American cities The mutineers weighted themselves down with this trash thinking themselves rich They were almost too ignorant TWO ESCAPE During the second day ashore Taffir and Can-- ! dreau escaped from their captors and journeyed twenty miles together to a settlement where they had learned there was a man who could speak English They found him' and told their story The Brazilian authorities acted promptly and sent officers who arrested the whole partyDf mutineers How thjose dumb fellows must have wondered when confronted with charges of murder mutiny! and piracy on the high seas! They had thought themselves safe and rich A Brazilian court martial held the mutineers for extradition and English authorities were notified In February 1864 the trial began before a jury and lasted only one day Seven mutineers were found guilty of mutiny murder and piracy One was found not guilty on these charges but guilty of sinking a ship at sea ABUSES RELATED About the only defense the men made was a long recital of abuses by the captain and first mate Their stories had much truth in them as far as these charges were concerned But a court doesn't take much account of provocation in such cases as this The seven jnen were sentenced to death but two of them not so active in the murdering of the officers as the others wer reprieved and sent to prison with hard labor for life On 22 1864 the five were hanged at once It February was a great day for the hangman All but Lyons proved craven cowards in the face of death and one of the bullies who had been so brave on the deck knocking unarmed officers over the head and fairly gloating over the bloodshed fainted of fright on the scaffold Lyons the only one who had shown any human feelings at all went to death without a murmur He also had refused to offer any defense at the trial Lyons had saved Anderson's life although Anderson did go through life with a back neck from the blow of the handspike wielded by the mongrel from Manilla QggggjgSty V- - - h J The voyage lasted three weeks after the murder on4 To ffi y rmiHnv Otifp n shimwoo hailed her with permission of the mutineers to obtain a bearing The Manilla men1 stood close to the mate with their knives in their hands while the conversation with the strange ship was going on They promised to strike him dead if he should even start to betray them Taffir told a story of false identity cooked up by the mutineers and the strange ship made no inquiries During the first week in October the Flowery Land made port in a lonely inlet on the coast of Brazil The1 mutineers compelled Anderson to go below and bore holes fore and aft They made plans to lock the honest men below and let them go down with the ship nnH PLANS CHANGED However these plans were changed The men who had not mutinied woujd be taken along The property of the captain and all the money in the ship had been divided among the mutineers and the villains had done their best to drink up the wine cargo during the three weeks' voyage An effort to escape in a boat was made by some of the men and frustrated by the mutineers One of the Chinese sailors was killed during the interlude Came'ffer Three Years Free Labor By O O McINTYRE o The first notable success in writing a New York column was achieved by Herbert Corey who turned in one of great excellence for Charles P Taffs Cincinnati Times Star He discontinued the assignment to become a war correspondent and upon his return became a distinguished magazine writer There was a man who turned out a New York syndicated column before Gorey largely of a financial nature who used the pseudonym "Holland" He had quite a following among bankers and the settled type of business man My inspiration to write a New York column came from reading Corey's stuff while edging the copy desk of an opposition paper in Cincinnati He did the job so it strikes me better than anyone before or since but he had no notion of syn dicating FAITH IN IDEA I camped on the syndicate doorsteps the first year in New York working on a newspaper Not one had faith in the idea —it had been tried time after time and failed But being young ambitious and foolishly hopeful I wrote my screed -- every evening after the day's work at the office and sent it out free to any newspaper that would accept This gratuitous service extended over a period of three years It eventually took on but not until after I had given up my regular job lived in a hall bedroom and was cutting my own hair In this particular field of syndication T was the pioneer and prepared a somewhat rich soil for those to come Every syndicate man will admit-thYet the only journalistic abuse I have suffered has been from those who reaped the unforseen harvest of what came very nearly being my own starvation It Isn't important but I had to fill up this Sunday space on a rath- er arid day So I thought of that And here it is v at A gentleman with time on his hands and a patron of the art ambulandi writes that he strolled over the midtown section for three hours on a recent! afternoon His area was betweeri 42d and 59th In that interlude lie counted but four wagons drawn by horses IMPOSSB3LE TO SAVE One was a cart and the All the witnesses against the pirates said a rood rest wagons sprinkling of street' word for Lyons at the trial but there could be no peddlers doubt about the fellow's guilty participation in the actual slaughtering of the officers and the passen High - priced writers of advergers so it was not possible to save him tising copy — the crack wizards with four figured weekly incomes (Copyright 1935 Charles B Driscoll) — recruits from newspaper or magazine offices They are developed chiefly in the agencies and are those who have acquired the uncanny nack of sizing up public reactions to the art of quick phrasing The advertising slogan looks a cinch — just a few words you have often heard before— but it is difficult to select All day long and until dark he would wait thus the right one and takes years of in blistering heat and in stinging cold under the experience Slogans that look dandy in copy are complete duds on sun or through the stifling glare of the printed page And the one you snows and of the may think isn't so hot is often door-to-do- or are-"rarel- T© by A P Terhune It rtrlJV6 aat was a great day for the hangman sails you may think this rather amazing pRHApS yarn comes under the head of "Tall Stories" vv UUVoJ reggfosk--- : ! station Hachiko was a rare judge of timing Never once did he leave home a minute earlier or later than he needed for traversing the distance from house to the station and arriving there precisely when the train was due He did not allow anything or anybody to detain him on these journeys As the train slowed to a halt he was waiting alertly for his master to step from the cars to the platform ESCORT HIM HOME Then he would greet the returning passenger and would escort him proudly home This to the amusement of all the railroad men and commuters and bystanders The little dog's fame began to spread u When it came time to leave the ship another Chinese was killed for hiding The third the Chinese cook could not be found and the boat filled with mutineers and their prisoners shoved off toward iimffl Willi i ' j There in his accustomed waiting place close be- side the station's main entrance from the platform he would sit down — and begin his daily vigil He sprang to his feet as each train came chugging to a stop at the platform's edge Up and down the line of cars he would canter peering upward in S a rst a wistful' hopefulness for sight or scent of the man he was expecting Then with a weary sigh he would slouch back to his place of waiting alongside the main entrance There he would sit or lie until the next train came in Claus Or The Bogey Man? r Television seems to be the most elusive thing in our lives A few years ago we were told that the perfection of television was only a matter of months The other "day David Sarnoff president of R C A said television would arrive in 1940 That little place lovingly known as "Just Around the Corner" seems to be getting pretty crowded Television is just around the corner Prosperity is just around the corner Inflation is just around the corner Why wait any longer? What do you say if we all go around the corner and) join them? uu Driscoll 57 uoe? not- - outers ana otner wnolly reliable news ag- encies have told and retold the tale And Rntfr's Tokyo correspondent cabled its final episode to London It is 100 per cent true Let's go: Dr Hidesaburo Ueno was a professor in a JapaWe never had any luck with tin soldiers made in Japan Something nese agricultural university He commuted back and inside always snapped as soon as forth from the university to his Tokyo home which the children wound them up They was near the Shibuya railroad station never really got going at aU QUEER LOOKING Maybe the Japanese are making Dr Ueno had a queer-lookin- g their flying bombs in the same terrier that was his best loved chum The dog's name was almost as long as was the dog himself His name was "Tchukene Hachiko" (Let's save space by dropping the first The latest income tax statistics show that there was only one man half of it and calling him ''Hachiko" shan't we? in the United States with an in- That is the name he was :known by in the cable discome of over six million dollars in patches) 1934 I wish the guilty party would Every morning Hachiko trotted at his master's come out in the open and admit side to the train that was to take the professor to his identity My tailor who now gets his daily duties Then the terrier would go home one hundred and thirty dollars for again and wait there until just before the afternoon a suit is tired denying that he's train was due to deposit! his owner at the Shibuya the man B mmi - er staff simple-minde- ©aimese ! OIn m land WW -- O v to-han- g se II r k er o jl by Charles merchant ship Flowery Land in command of John Smith left London for Singapore with a cargo of wine dry goods and other merchan1863 The captain's brother dise early in July a was passenger The first mate was John George Kars well second mate William Taffir and the ship's boy was Jim Early aged 17 There were three Chinese aboard one of whom was cook JThe rest of the crew was a pickup lot composed of a Turk a Negro a Slavonian a Greek a Norwegian and several Manilla men of no particular nationality It was not a happy voyage from the outset Captain Smith was rough and when an order was not instantly and skillfully obeyed he usually knocked down the man he believed to be at fault That was the captain's way of saying "Don't do it that way again" A bit too much rum made the captain more severe than he might otherwise have been BEATEN WITH ROPE Mate Karswell took his cue from the captain He had the men beaten with a rope's end when they did not please him That as all seamen know is the way to start a mutiny Karswell dragged a sick Greek sailor out of his bunk and had him strapped to the bulwarks This was something too much even for the captain who ordered the man put to bed and given medicine and it Says Rube O m ard-Examin- provides its readers with superior local news written by experienced and accurate men and women MyDirov ©on MeirclhaoiilrinrDap Brm Be Merry If We Earn O i Stand SUNDAY MORNING DECEMBER 22 1935 olmas Will o mm (yvw SECTION THREE o mm The v TTD-Q- IS norma ? mid-summ- er gale-swe- pt rain-torren- ts mid-wint- er WOULD TROT HOME worth a million At last when the final train for the day had come Central Park West and South in he would trot miserably home — only to start out which reached the peak of their afresh for the station early next morning building boom at the low swoop of Loyalty is the virtue most praised in Japan The Wall street are getting out of the master became doldrums again and having the best little terrier's loyalty to his long-dea- d the admiration of all that section of the empire year in the six past There were Japanese newspapers printed and reprinted the some huge new apartment' houses tale of his tireless vigils year af etr year Japanese only 20 per cent filled and those sightseers would throng to the Shibuya station just at low rentals Nearly all had to go to gaze in admiration at the solitary and heart- through die bankruptcy wringer broken dog The story was told in class to school- But today most of them are 70 per cent rented and may soon be comchildren from one end of the country to the other For eleven years this strange vigil continued pletely out of the woods Early every morning Hachiko would set forth from Few sections of Manhattan ex the home of Dr Ueno's widow and he would stay at the railroad station until late in the evening press the small towny spirit of between 72d and upper Broadway NATIONAL FIGURE 112th street In "the early evening He became a national character a living symbol The sidewalks bulge with of loyalty saunterers with their wives The years took toll of his body stiffening it and and dogs leisurely window shopstrewing his dark muzzle with silvery hairs and ping exchanging bows with apartmaking his gait slower and more labored than once ment house neighbors stopping in it had been for a soda at the corner drug store At last a bronze statue of Hachiko was erected or dropping in at the neighborhood by popular subscription and it was placed close be- movie Much of the hurry honk and side the living dog near the main entrance to the confusion of lower Broadway is station missing It might be Main street Terrier and statue waited side by side for' the in one of those 15 000 -- sized Saturtrain which never would bring Hachiko' master home day night towns In fifty motion picture houses films were shown of the dog and of his bronze image The hotels of upper Broadway Then one morning early in 1935 Hachiko was are chiefly family inns with venernot sitting In his usual place The news spread This able colored doormen Guests sit in was the first time In eleven years that the terrier the lounge' after dinner the men had foresaken his post smoking and the women knitting: listening to a three piece orchestra FOUND DYING The clerks are white haired and Search was made Alongside the roadway a few gentle looking and in so many inhundred feet from the platform his dying body was stances have the aristocratic aura found On his way to the station that morning that somehow clings to those who heart-failur- e had stricken him as eleven years earlier have seen better days it had stricken Professor Hidesaburo Ueno Five eminent doctors worked over him But all their skill Dandy reading: could not save him "A Mirror for Skylarks" by MarThe tidings of his death swept the whole city tin Hare (A story of young love Within an hour his statue was heaped with wreaths in a Paris pension) and clouds of incense werejburning before it "Silas Crockett" by Ellen Chase Solemnly tearfully the pitiful little body was laid (The Maine coast's sturdy seamen in a coffin and was borne to the Aoyama cemetery in romantic parade) There Hachiko was laid to sleep "beside Dr Ueno's Biographical Dictionary by H L and P K Fitzhugh (All about the grave But it was not the customary burial accorded most Important 500 persons past and to a mere dogl The whole nation mourned Hachiko present) pipe-smoki- ng -- LI ' Elaborate funeral services were performed over his grave services in which no fewer than sixteen Buddhist priests in ceremonial vestments took part BUDDIOST RITES The terrier was interred with full Buddhistic rites On his grave said the Reuter cable dispatch twenty-five wreaths and more than two hundred sheaves of cut flowers were placed His master's widow received an avalanche of telegrams and letters of sympathy and many high notables attended the funeral itself Yes I said it all sounds like a "Tall Story' But it is true (Copyright 1935 McNaught SyndicaU) New f5fork for the first time in this generation has become quake conscious as the result of the two temblors weeks ago An agency on Lexington avenue flaunts a s:n: "Quake insurance" 44 - BURR OAK Kans — (UP) — The William E Dannefer family has a spinning wheel which is 122 years old It was built on the island of Fahlstar near Denmark brought to this country in 1S53 and to Kansas by ox team 1 |