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Show Reflections, May 17, 1984, Page 4 Dont Crumble Under Adjustment Ann Landers: surance agent to check coverage. 2. If possible, permit your husband As he grows to be a decision-maker- . to feel he needs increasingly disabled, respected. 3. Learn to tune out the awful things he says to you. You are a convenient target. He knows nobody else would tolerate such treatment. The person most helpful always is the one most resented. 4. Remove yourself from the role of custodian. If you have a job, keep it. If you dont, get one preferably one where you will work with people. 5. Hire a companion, if you must, while you shop and do errands. If he can use the telephone, he can be left alone for short periods. He won't like your absence at first and will try to make you feel guilty. Ignore the digs. 6. Be honest. When someone says how cheerful he is and how well he has adjusted, it's all right to say, It appears that way, but he can be very difficult." Theres no need to perpetuate the fantasy that only the patient suffers. 7. If theres a local support group related to your husband's illness, join it. If there is none, establish one. Take care of yourself. You will be of no help to anyone in times of crisis if you allow yourself to crumble under the strain. Hope Ive Helped Dear Ann Landers: May respond to the woman whose husband is confined to a wheelchair? Her letter hit me right between the I eyes. Dear No Name: You are not alone and countless others have been there before us. Thats why groups support are formed. Your husband is still in the first stages of coping with his illness. Disbe lief, frustration and anger are the causes of his outbursts. When he accepts what is, he will be calmer. You can do several things to preserve your own sanity. 1. Call your local home health agency. (Check the white pages of the phone book.) Staff members will evaluate your husband's condition and schedule home visits. He will do for them what he will not for you for example, follow instructions regarding diet, therapy, hygiene. Fees are based on financial need; call Social Security for Medicare information and your in I I Lover in Pa. Dear Lover: If you are middle-incom- you for that comforting now once again, I recomAnd poem. Thank I For All Parents "Ill lend you for a little time, a child of mine," He said. "For you to love while he lives, and mourn when he is dead. It may be six or seven years, or twenty-twor three, But will you, till I call him back, take care of him for me? He'll bring his charms to gladden you, and shall his stay be brief, mend an organization that has brought solace to countless parents who have lost children. It is Compassionate Friends. The national headquarters address is P. 0. Box 1347, Oak Brook, III. 60521. In Canada its The Compassionate Friends, National Center Winnipeg, 685 Williams Ave., Manitoba, Winnipeg, Only a person who has experienced the trauma of losing a chid can know the pain. Compassionate Friends has the ability to heal the hearts of fellow sufferers when all else has failed. 6 Good stamps have BECAME A SECOND CURRENCY. 9 i U.S. OF DEPARTMENT AGRICULTURE FIGURES SHOW A iO PERCENT INCREASE IN THE PROGRAM OVER THE OPEN Monday Morning Memorial Day May 28th 6 a.m. till 10 a. m 3 IS 351 North Main I ffooD STAHPsf I Accepts II m TEARS. SENATOR JESSE HELMS (R-N- C) TO STOP FOOD STAMP FRAUD AND FIGHTING MISMANAGEMENT WHICH COSTS TAXPAYERS MORE THAN $1 BiaiON ANNUALLY: SOME FOR CONCERN... rWHY9 Ho"ts Carpet cleaning3 van-mount- ed available. ai carpet cleaning system 'lN Because we simply try harder to give our customers the very best service avallble anywhere! NOWI Wt distribute the amazing ORECK VACUUM CLEANER! Used by hotels and motels all over the country. 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MEMORIAL DAY REMEMBRANCE Call TOOELE FLORAL 882-066- I I You Can Lose 17 to 25 Pounds In Just 6 Weeks. . . And well teach you how to keep it oil! Call today (or a free consultation 882-481- I Dear Ann Landers: have eight cats My husband and all strays. Last year our veterinarian bills ran close to $400. Four of our cats are over 12 years old. Last week badly inpicked up another stray jured. The hospital bill was $47. The problem: My husband keeps indissisting ask the veterinarian for a count because we have been frequent customers for more than 10 years. The subject came up again last night when our eldest cat had a tumor removed. Another $24. My husband Cat told me to ask Ann Landers. When you decide to lose weight call Diet Center! DlETfc, CENTER Youll have his lovely memories as solace for your grief. cannot promise he will stay, since all from earth return, But there are lessons taught down there want this child to learn. I've looked the wide world over in my search for teachers true And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes, I have selected you. Now will you give him all your love, nor think the labor vain, Nor hate me when I come to call, to take him back again! fancied that heard them say, Dear Lord, Thy will be done. For all the joy Thy child shall bring, the risk of grief well run. Well shelter him with tenderness, we'll love him while we may; And for the happiness weve known, will ever grateful stay. But shall the angels call for him much sooner than we planned, We'll brave the bitter grief that comes, and try to understand! -- Anonymous, West Palm Beach W.P.B. Dear Dear Hope: You have. Thanks for your words of wisdom. Nothing speaks more loudly than the voice of experience. TO SOCIAL SECURITY CARDS |
