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Show The Taste of Ashes . .... (Continued) 2.H ,f t J - I returned to her ey es, which again were red from weeping. She pleaded with me, alternately threatening and begging, but - - - - - vMimimfJiAViinisy. uuUJlJiiJJ fa becoming so wild that I was moved to the psychiatric ward. Unable to quiet' me, the doctors at Hartford Hospital called Dr. Edgren and asked that the Institute come and get me. Within the hour, four attendants entered my room to take m back. When one of them took my arm, I smashed a fist into his face; but I was forcibly restrained and removed; , When we arrived at the Institute, I i i . pj- was viuivui iiiai xjuicu uiAiCieu an injection of Pentothal Sodium to knock mc out. 's r was My awakening shattering. I was in a tiny cell-liroom in the disturbed ward, a locked unit for who are bent on or are dangerous to others. I screamed and raved at the attendants who tried to quiet me. I insisted that they send for Dr. Edgren, WtenT he arrived, I cursed him TluentlyT He listened quietly and said, "Bill, the time has come for you to face up to facts. As long as yqu are here, I am in control. From now on, you don't get a single bit of sleeping medicine," Snatching up my artificial leg, I hurled it at him. It struck against the wall, scant inches from his head, and clattered to the floor. Dr. Edgren stooped and picked it up. "I'll just take this with me until you need itgairilvas all Thsd7Therrhe . - Gifts tlxat make life easier and fit your budget, too at your General Electric dealer's - to no avail. ( i I continued my daily broadcast, but gradually it balneoyeadlnbfe possible. The voice of which I had been so proud was broken and scratchy. My lips would form words but no sounds would come forth, my face contorting as I strove wretchedly to enunciate. For the first time, complaints from stations poured in to ABC for "letting a drunk go on the air." After this, the end wasn't long in coming. By early June, 1956, it no longer was a question of my work and my home. It was becoming a matter of life or death and. life appeared a certain GENERAL LEGTRIC Ji . ke psy-chot- self-destruct- ' loser. I could no longer perform because my lips twitched uncontrollably, my mouth and my throat felt as if was fever-dr- y, I was swallowing razor blades. The words which were my livelihood simply wouldn't come any more; One night, Harriet sat staring at me as I jerked nervously about the room in tigerish torment, then she suddenly burst into tears. Miserably helpless, I simply stood there until she cried herself out. "Sit down, Bill, and listen to me;" she said in a dead, lifeless tone. Her next words seemed to knock the breath out of me. "Bill, I can't no, I won't take this any longer." We talked for hours, as we had so often in the past, but this time there was a difference. Harriet now remained ' ;' - 2: If - ' :"r Vn 1 JwithPushbutton Dial Beam end J AufsrszMc Ctankef. With- Radio. J Ccmfort:!xtor to keep Pocket Fits pocket or purse, Weighs one pound with batter- ies. Earphone jack for private Sven-TrontUt- or tern- pcrature tt colors. corners. warmth selected. Custom-tailore- d Ccn-.- f. ' f zidy washable. J Stcroophonic Portable dual- Phonograph. Qock-Rad- io Snooz- - Alarm9 Timer. Wakes you, lets you cat nap, calls again, Turns appliances on and off. listening. 3 colors available. 14-w- O Miniature Lighted Did Alarm (night view shown). Fits att Dyna-Si- x amplifier. Four 4 power speakers. speeds. Plays . monaural records, too. 5Vi-in- ch ..: ' , , ., Cue-e-ft crowded places. Easy-to-renight. White case and dial. ad v rll If W day or Q Golden Circle Snooz-Afar- m P No sooner had he gone than I yelled for an; attendant and demanded pencil and paper. I would show them. Who did they think they were, to keep Bill Stern locked lip this way? I'd demand -77 my releaser- - ng - day Dr. N ext letter in his Edgren returned, my hand. "Bill," he said, "you don't want to do this. If you leave now, you'll never get well." JLwas imperious and curt. "I want out. That's all I want from you, and what happens to me is nobody's business but v t was a beautiful day, that morning June ed Family Weekly, December 6, 1959 r ' u Portable : SIscm & Dry Iron. The only iron with the Even-Flosteam process for continuous, steam. Converts to handy dry iron, too. fAixer. Beats . . '. . . mixes drinks! Light, whips yet powerful enough for mixing heaviest batters. Includes drink- mixing attachment. w deep-penetrati- ng . . , ' Q Maker. ; Peek. A.Brew Coffee level counts the cups, as you fill, as you serve, Brews 3 to 10 cups of delicious coffee automatically. Built-i- n O V i'Straiaht-Line- v - ' Extra-hig- h Awtemctie Skillet. Fries, bakes, stews with no watching, no burning, no smoking. Removable temperature con- - pop-u- p. troL Skillet is completely immersible. Beautiful new styling. Q All Chrome drug-withdra- wal to drugs." all that I gradually, symp- taking as nightrbuC very slowly Dr. Edgren started to cut down, first to 12, then to 10. For several days I received eight pills, but they didn't seem to have their prev-ioTeffectrWhen they wereJ?mughUo. "Tnelhe next time, I cut them into pieces. us Four of them were decoys, sugar-coatpills masked in the same outer covet ing --as the sleeping tablets. I flew into a rage. Did they think they ed -- ere-dealing-with-arehi termined to get even. During the daily psychiatric session in Dr. Edgren's Polisher-Scrubbe- r-. Rug Cleaner. New Waxes, polishes, scrubs, buffs floors even cleans rugs. Complete with snap-o- n attachments. ! ntadematfc of General Electric Company has helped to lead you back The first few weeks were had expected. But, painfully, the worst of the toms subsided. I was still "many as 16 sleepintabletsat drugs?" Dr. Edgren's reply consisted of one word,7 crisp, authoritative, and final: "Unquestionably." That word settled the issue. Harriet -- O Auto- - malic Toaster. Has browning control to satisfy any toast-love- r! my own." But it was. Dr. Edgren called Harriet and advised commitment proceedings. When I heard this, I went into another violent rage, soon replaced by terror. Would Harriet let me down? When she came to the Institute, she asked Dr. Edgren one question. "If he is allowed to leave, will he go back on 16, 1956, horn-rimm- io . of when we started out for Hartford. Harriet drove in silence all the way. As she pulled to a stop in front of the buildings which were to be my prison, she said, "Well, Bill, we might as well go in." A tall young man in a tweed suit came up to us. He held out his hand, level eyes regarding 'us appraisingly behind glasses. "Mr. and I Mrs. Stern? am Dr. Gordon Edgren." After Harriet left. Dr. Edgren talked casually for a while,- - then asked, "Do you have any jnedicine with you?" I handed over the Demerol tablets to this big easygoing man who assured me I would be given all the sleeping medicine I needed that night and that someone would be with me constantly during the first few days. "But our biggest problem," he warned, "is really the matter of sleeping medicine. I do not regard the drugs as being half as menacing as the sleeping pills you are taking. That is the crutch which- - ion left Clock. Wakes you, lets you snooze, on metal case. Perfect for wakes thai you again. Brass trim high- kitchen or dining room. Black, white or lights antique white case. Luminous. copper color background. wall-huggi- ics -- 0Ftlvcl Clock. Gay folk art design xoldly adamant Putting aside what remained of my pride, I called a doctor. But not for drugs. I explained that I wanted the name of anJnstitution-whic- h would take me and keep me until I was cured unquestionably, no matter how long it took. We decided on the Institute of Living in Hartford, Conn. I . Q Cord Reel Oesner. A touch of your toe and cord retracts inside cleaner, . "Piggy-back- " "Double-Actio- n" attachment caddy. rug and floor unit. General Electric Company, Housewares Division A Radio Receiver Department. of- fice, I tried to balk his every move, and I continued to ficrht aeainst withdrawal of sleeping medicine with every device r and August. Then in September there came a crushing climax. I had a severe kidney-ston- e attack and, as fate would from the have it, Dr. - Edgren was away TnstltuteT- The days dragged on through July I was taken to the nearby Hartford Hospital, where morphine was adminis- terd. It was like touching flame to a powder keg. My awakening voracity knew no bounds. When thenurse re- fused my demands, I screamed and cursed, ripping up my bed covering and agreed to have me committed. I sank into complete despair. The Saturday before commitment was to become final, I waited behind the locked doors of the ward, unconscious of the other poor souls around me. One of the attendants turned on the television set. It was the opening football game of the season. "This will be a good game, Mr. Stern," he said. "But I guess you've seen so many of them that it's hard for you to work up much interest." At that moment, someth ing stirred in me. - Not -- . interested? I'd have given anything to be back as a part of that excitement, . (Continued) Family Weekly, December 6, 1959 11 " |