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Show .f jr 1 -- tiki fasur tf S -- .'NT. - .... CG(S)CLa3 - .. - by Edith G. Ncisscr, author of "Brothers and Sisters 1VT ow ada ys, husbands are expected not only to bring Jiome the bacon but to help scour the pan lfs fried in. Sharing housework andjthe careof the children is one of the gains or, depending on how you look at it, one of the penalties for men in today's world. The ideal arrangement of parentsand children living together without any other rela tives around carries a penalty with it Take away the grandparents, unmarried aunts and "hired girl," sisters, and the and what have you? You have a young mother who cooks, cleans, washes, mends, and cares for the children 24 hours a day! Husbands can and do come to the rescue, but they, work hard at their own jobs and want to relax when they come home in the evening. Under those conditions, how much help can a man be expected to give his wife? This question was arising between Nora and Joel Gorelli with such frequency and sharpness that their entire relationship was being affected by it. Joel puts his case this way: "When I come home at night, I want to take it easy. Sometimes on Saturday or Sunday, I'd like to sleep late, but Nora thinks she should get the breaks over the week end and her selfishness is ruining our marriage. I realize that Nora has plenty to do all day looking after the kids; still, I don't think that justifies having her expect me to take over the minute I walk in. I'd like her to say, 'Hi, honey, how are you?' but with Nora it's always, 'About time you got home! I'm fed up! Here, you handle these wild Indians!' "She thinks my week ends should be spent doing jobs she didn't get around to, or maybe didn't feel like doing during the week. She expects me to take care of the kids and cook theweekr endnteak shop, or visit her friends. "Nora has a washer, dryer, vacuum cleaner, and lots of other gadgets to make her work easier. Why, my mother thought she was 1 """" : old-fashio- ned .1 j lucky to have running water and electric lights! Our kitchen shelf is full of ready-th- is that. But my wife says she and quick-fixican't get my dinner ready unless I feed the children and put them to bed, , "After dinner, Nora collapses in a comfortable chair with my newspaper and expects me to clean up because she's had a hard day. What does she think I've had? "I certainly agree that children need to be with their" fathers, and I get as much enjoy ment out of my kids as the next man. But I still think a home and children are a woman s ng on1 cVio enmilrf .ftftAnoilkilitir 0MJil3.llhSAXA VJT , IUIU A handkit. Nora Vf sVllp to says I have my father's old-fashio- ideas about women waiting on their husbands hand and foot. I know my mother was one woman in a million, arid I wouldn't want Nora to work as hard as she did. I'm" willing to do myhare, but the guestion is: what's my share and what's Nora's?" How Nora mh things Nora, of course, has a different view of the problem. She says: "If Joel ever spent a day cooped up with three screaming children he'd know why I'm exhausted by" the time he comes home. Bubbles and Butch aren't any worse thanother youngsters, and the. baby is a lamb, butthe chil constant careof even the dren seven days a week gets you down! "In Summer it isn't so bad. We girls get together when the children are outdoors. But in Winter or. in bad weather well, by the Ume it's haps and dressed and get yourself ready, hardly worth the trouble to go out. "I never get through with what I plan to do because I'm interrupted every few minutes by. Butch wanting iis paints or Bubbles tryinglo .cut the baby's" hair- witlrjier toy scissors. There really ought to be two of me, best-behav- ed -- i - especially at suppertime when everything suddenly seems to go wrong! The potatoes boil over, the baby drops his bottle, the phone rings, the children start squabbling, there's a load of wash in the machine and . me with just one pair of hands! ma"People" talk about the labor-savichines you have nowadays. A dryer or vacwork, uum cleaner saves you that's true, but it's still just a machine. My mother had a laundress who could keep an eye on the baby for ten minutes, or watch .. ng back-breaki- , ,.. - ned ng N. |