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Show 16 Nov. 18,1993 Hilltop Times ddltetf oufl' one wntflfo p)irbueififi) imDy Staying with an addict is also a form of dysfunctional behavior, known as codependency. by Connie Hanney, CAC Civilian DrugAlcohol Program coordinator After "Mr. Jones" was fired from his job for ing a urine test for marijuana, he entered a fail- 28-da- y addiction treatment program. His wife was invited to participate in a related family program as well, and she only attended because she thought it would help her husband. But when she was told that she was there to address her own related problems, she walked out in disgust. "I'm not the one with the problem," she told herself. And yet, by choosing to stay married to an addict without seeking outside help, she was exhibiting a dysfunctional behavior also what has come to be known as codependent behavior. Codependency also describes individuals who terminate relationships with addicted partners only to turn around and get involved with another addict. (Food, rage, gambling, sex, religion, drugs, power, money and work can all be addictions.) As a result of growing up in a dysfunctional, or abusive family, individuals often a develop predictable pattern of behaviors. If you are codependent, you may recognize yourself in the following sample of codependent behaviors: O Codependents are notorious for not taking proper care of themselves. They assume responsibility for meeting other people's needs, and yet they feel guilty about meeting their own needs. B Codependents need to be needed. They seek relationships with people who need to be rescued. They take care of another person's health, mental and personal growth while neglecting to meet their own needs and solve their own problems. D Some codependents confuse needs and wants. They tend to overindulge their wants, but neglect well-bein- g, their normal adult needs, such as love, affection, and even medical care. On the other hand, they may buy everything they want, or eat everything they want, to compensate for their normal needs that are not being met. B Codependents are famous for being control freaks. They try to control things that are beyond their control and often none of their business. They need to control other people's feelings, thoughts, behaviors and the outcome of situations. Codependents will monitor their own behavior in an attempt to control the moods of other people and keep them happy. An overwhelming need to control may occur because, as a child, the codependent's life was or because personal control was taken away from them by an parent. B Codependents have trouble experiencing apShame is often used propriate levels of in dysfunctional families to keep control over family members and secrets. Individuals who are ashamed seldom have any appreciation of their own value as a person. Being devoid of they often turn to outside sources to tell them they're OK out-of-contr- over-controlli- self-estee- self-estee- IH! "Specializing In - Wholesale To The Public" Price CHINESE AMERICAN BUFFET CHICO s i WONG'S the Mall... THEN GIVE US A CALL! lOO 547-- 1 the expensive home or car, the perfect family, the perfect profession and the perfect life. They require an audience to tell them how they are doing on the perfection scale, so they often have great difficulty who bebeing alone (unless they are of the sub-typ- e come hermits). B The codependents' compulsion to earn approval from outside of themselves becomes fueled by a fear of being abandoned. They will expend enormous amounts of energy trying to maintain a destructive relationship rather than leaving. Drug and alcohol addiction is now recognized as a family disease. The Social Actions Office at Hill AFB encourages anyone who recognizes him- - or herself or a family member, as well as practicing substance abusers, to seek help. The Social Actions Office has four certified addictions counselors on staff whose services are free to the Hill AFB community. Group counseling, individual counseling and brown-ba- g seminars on Social are available. The Actions codependency Office is located in Bldg. 555. For information on or availability of services call Ext. Over 17 Course Excellent Buffet! "All Yon Can Eat" Lunch Special Our Quality TOtect HOURS: & MON.-SA- Unbeatable! Prices are 11 T. :00 P.M. Roy A.M.-- 9 5686 South 1900 West Located in the Barnes 773-064- 2 Bank Bldg.. Layton Bennett Chiropractic Office ? - Imagine ED your choice of 17 delicious, burgers. . .from the hearty to the special taste of the Monterrey Burger to the one that made us famous... The Bleu Bacon Burger. 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