Show HELPFUL HUSBAND LARGELY A MYTH Little Gained by Letting Him Tinker Men are supposed to to be handy with he the hammer bammer and good at nt doing odd jobs round the house but from what I hear bear from irom women who have them husbands I mean menn not hammers Its It's a n tradition lacking In truth If a trusting rusting wife asks her spouse tt to repair repair re- re pair a chair leg or an electrical fixture fix fix- turo ture ure It cannot be be- bedone done until a n suitable suitable suit suit- able ble kit of e expensive pensive tools Is bought Mien the tools arrive ho he does not know now how bow to use them In the end endle the le wife has to hire a n workman and instead of saving money she Is out the he price of the tools One wife decided It was ridiculous to o pay a n carpenter to hang the porch swing wing when hed bed husband and grown gro son on were boded able and reasonably intelligent The twain were vere willing witting wittingto willingto to o lend both brains and brawn and started operations by tapping the porch roof root to locate the Joist The sound told nothing to their untrained ears so they bored eight experimental holes oles without ever touching the secretIve beam Eventually E the lady lot of f the house sent for a n carpenter carpenterI who filled up the eight holes and hung ung the swing I One summer this same father and andon andson son on tried to save sa the family bud budget et by y building a n coal bin In the basement basement basement base base- ment In which to hoard coal conI bou bought ht at t low prices Their fancy carpenter carpen- carpen ter er work loosened the brick foun foundation n- n tion on so t that mt the cellar leaked all winter Inter and In the spring a n brick mason mason maon ma- ma son on repaired the damages at considerable consid- consid rable erable c. c expense pense Then theres there's the woman who hated to o spend 10 for an outside aerial for her new radio She Insisted that her husband could save money by build build- lag Ing ng one Accordingly he bought the necessary material He lie crawled under uner un- un der er the edge of ot the house to ground the he wire properly and as he was a n hefty efty brute he got stuck under the foundation foundation and pulled a Floyd Col Col- I lins Ins S Sympathetic neighbors dug ug him out and he went wept to bed bel to nurse his bruises while a hireling g built the aerial Instead of or saving s money he be paid a doctors doctor's bill The most Interesting trait these helpless husbands show Is s their willIngness willingness willingness will will- to spend hours In Inventing a wa way to escape the work th their lr wives assign to them thero This tendency has hus led to most of ot our Important household household household house house- hold Inventions Of Ot course It was a aman aman aman man who first thought of ot washing Ironing sweeping and beating eggs by electrical power Probably hIs hla wife asked him to help her ber one day when she was waa sick As often as not his Inventive vers po powers lead him to grief Instead of success as In the Instance of ot the man too laz lazy to carry carryout carryout carryout out his wife's garbage pall pail She I kept ept the garbage In the rear by the garage door and asked ed him to put It on the curb each Monday morning Therefore Therefore There There- fore when he backed the car out he would place the garbage can on the tile running board and stop at the curb long enough to park the the can thus savin saving at nt least a n hundred feet teet of ot unnecessary unnecessary un un- un necessary can carrying One morning mornIng morn morn- Ing he be forgot to remove the garbage can from the running board and never gave It t a th thought until he made a quick stop at a prominent traffic Intersection There was a fearful clatter on the left of the car and he looked out In time to see his breakfast fast grapefruit peels rolling beneath beneath beneath be be- neath a a flossy limousine not to mention mention mention men men- tion coffee grounds and potato parIngs parIngs parings par- par Ings strewn all over the scenery This husband Insists that he never recovered from the resultant Inferiority infer infer- orlly complex and his wife lost her garbage can which he couldn't possibly possibly possibly pos pos- sibly stop to collect The fond father who spent 2 2 for fora forn a n bomb to amuse his children o on the Fourth of July meant well welt when he lie put It on top of the grape arbor before before before be be- fore he lit It His Idea was to remove remove re re- re- re move mo It as far as ns possible from the bodies of his young joung hopefuls It fell off and c exploded In his wife's favorite favorite favorite fa fa- flower bed uprooting the pride of her life and undoing months of ot hard labor abor There are some women who can do more with a hairpin than the men of the Ule family can accomplish with the I most moat useful tools The vaunted superiority superiority supe supe- of the male In all mechanical matters often falls flat when he be Is asked to tinker Sometimes Its It's safer to leave the head of ot the house behind the newspaper and h hire re outsiders to take care of ot repairs Its It's cheaper cheap r In Inthe Inthe n the long run to pay one bill Instead of several Indianapolis Indianapolis News |