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Show Era I EraI ErawN wN 6 nn nnPolitics Politics POllhCl Makes Make $ Strange , . EtcPCilulIar EtcPeculiar Etc EtcPeculiar Peculiar PCilulIar deals involving congres congressional congresatonal congiessional sional atonal war profiteering revive slmi simi similar slmilar Bimllar lar shenanigans by legislators legisI.ators legisIators . in the thepast thepast thepast past . . About a century a"o ao aCo a < " o a group groupof groupof groupof of business men borrowed borrowtd ! $200 200 $ 000 000and 000and 000and and Incorporated the Central PacIfic PacIficrailroad Pacificrailroad Pacificrailroad railroad Then they used the 200Gs 200Gsto 200Gsto 200Gsto to bribe congressmen to steal rail railroad railroad railroad road franchises The 200Gs eventu eventually eventually eventually ally secured land grants for 9 000 000000 000 acres and a federal loan of of$27 of27 $27 27 $ 000 000 ' The swindlers swmdlers became rich and andpowerful andpowerful andpowerful powerful railroad owners WIthOUt WIthOUtinvesting withoutinvesting withoutInvesting investing a penny of their thelI own ownmoneyl ownmoney ownmoneyl moneyl money ! - The Tweed Ring Rlug was the most mostcorrupt mostcorrupt mostcorrupt corrupt gang that ever affilctedNew afflictedNew afflicted affilcted | New York Boss Tweed filched filchedmIllions filchedmillions filchedmillions mIllions via bribery bnbery and legalishc legalistic legalishchocus legalistichocus legalistichocus hocus pocus-until pocus until pocus - until he was finallyput finally finallyput finallyput put behind bars But Tweed beat beatthe beatthe beatthe the rap many times After one onegrand onegrand onegrand grand jury fa tailed failed ed to dig up enoughevidence enough enougheVIdence enoughevidence eVIdence to indict Tweed an edito edIto- edItonahst editorialist editorialist - rialist nahst wrote that it reminded him himof himof himof of the man who had been dIscovered dIscovereddead discovereddead discovereddead dead and the jury 1ury was puzzled as asto asto asto to what caused his deathThe deathThe death deathThe The jury iury finally issued this re report report report port It was an act of God under undervery undervery undervery very suspicious circumstancesCapitol circumstances circumstancesCapitol Capitol Hill IIlll now is burdened wIth withtoo withtoo too many demagogues , But the thecurrent thecurrent thecurrent current batch area aren t gifted gllted wIth wIthHuey withHuey withHuey Huey Long s evil talent He was wasa wasa wasa a wily w11y rat A reporter once oncesaw oncesaw oncesaw saw a page from a Huey Long ad address address address dress Various Vanous Instructions were werepenciled werepenciled werepenciled penciled in the margins Such aspause as aspause pause here and use angry fist fistgesture fistgesture fistgesture gesture etcAt etcAt etc etcAt At the end of one long paragraph paragraphthe the following was scribbled in capi capital cap capltal ! tal letters Argument weak here hereYell hereYell hereYell Yell like hell helll ! Ooe One machine machme in the East doesn t tmiss tmiss tmiss miss a vote getting gethng trick The boss bosssends bosssends bosssends sends toys to children cbddren of voters He lie HeI Heuses lieuses Heuses uses expensive chaufteured chauffeured cars to tobring tobring I . brmg bring voters to the polls And on onElect onElect I IElect Elect on day be he sends nurses to toI totake totake totake I take care of tots while mothers mothersvote mothersvote mothersvote mothersvoteNo vote voteNo No one ever has estimated how howmuch howmuch howmuch much money graft ng officials have havefilched havefilched havefilched filched But the sum reaches reacbes astro astro- astronomIcal astronomical astronomical - nomical figures One fact will gIVe gIVeyou giveyou giveyou you a faint famt idea ol of the rooking that thatthe thatthe thatthe the pubhc public has taken-and taken and taken - and still is istalong istaking istaking talong taking When Tammany was nd rid nding ridtag 109 tag h gh its take during durmg one year yearwas yearwas yearwas was $75 75 $75000000The $75000000 75000000 $75000000The $ 000000 The Influence of corrupt political politicalbosses politicalbosses politicalbosses bosses on national affairs cannot be beoverestimated beoverestimated beoverestimated overestimated Many lawmakers lawmakersare are merely errand boys tor for local localward localward localward ward heelers A reporter recently recentlysnapped recentlysnapped recentlysnapped snapped This is truly a mechanical mechan mechanical mechanical ical age Even public officials are arefrequently arefrequently arefrequently frequently machine mach1ne madeAll made madeAll All Is fair tale in love war and poll polltIcs polltics politics tIcs Sen George Norns Norris political politicalopponents politicalopponents politicalopponents opponents once persuaded a grocer grocernamed grocernamed grocernamed named George Norns NorrIs to enter theprimary the theprimary theprimary primary against agamst the U S senator senatorThe senatorThe senatorThe The Big Idea was to confuse voters votersby votersby votersby by having havmg similar sunilar names on the bal ballots ballots ballots lots But the scheme was called of off offwhen offwhen ! when ! it t was spotlighted by the thepress thepress thepress thepressMark press pressMark Mark IUark Twain Twam used uscd his pungent pen pento pento pento ! to attack the shady schemes of Tam Tammany Tarnmany many The deathof death of a Tammany Tammanyleader Tammanyleader I leader inspired one of Twain Twam s sfamed sfamed sfamed . famed quips qwps I refused to attend attendhis attendhis I his funeral But I wrote a very nIce nIceletter niceletter niceletter letter explaining explainmg that I approved of oft ofItl ofItlNtew I ! t ! Ntew New York Side-Show Side Show - - He Hestarted Hestarted Hestarted started working for a "aU aU mall mallStreeter "aUStreeter ft " allStrecter Streeter nearly a year agoUnder agoUnder ago agoUnder Under the impression his em employer employer employer ployer was wealthy He Hepracticed Hepracticed Hepracticed practiced { forging Qrgmg the boss slg Sig slgnature Signature signature nature After 10 months or or50he orsohe orso 50-he 50 he so-he so - he tried tn d passing passmg a checksIgned checksigned check checksigned signed with the employer 5 s 5nameto snamelo sname name-to name to name-lo lo - - to see if U It worked workedHe workedHe workedlie He wrote it out for oily o'11y o11y ' $50 50 $50It $50It $50It 50It $ It came back marked marhed I.l5w Il5w Lisuf I.l5wficlent Lisufficicnt Lisufficicnt . ficlent ficicnt Fundss FundsMussolini Funds FWlds s ' \ Mussolini l\IussotmJ l IussotmJ s 5 a daughter Edda who whohas whohas whohas has been amnestied by Italy has hasapplied hasapplied hasapplied applied for entry into mto Argentina Argentma be because because because cause there s no spot in Italy where whereshe whereshewouldbewelcome whereshe she shewouldbewelcome would be welcome But the pass passport passport passport port hasn t been okayed yetBelgIan yetBelgian yet yetBelgian Belgian monarchists are perturbed perturbedover perturbedover perturbedover over the 16 year old crown prince princeof princeof of Belgium who would prefer enter entering enterlag entering ing lag a monastery to assuming assummg the thethrone thethrone thethrone throne if the king ( as expected expectedabdicates ) abdIcates The most quoted quotedgag quotedgag quotedgag Shaighas gag ( m the foreign bars in m Sha Shaig Shaighai 19 19hal hal has ) ) goes this way The RussIans RussIanswill Russianswill Russianswill will probably obtain the atomIc atomIcbomb atomicbomb atomicbomb bomb m In the Shanghai marketLos marketLos market marketLos Los Angeles they say is be beIng beIng beIng Ing flooded fiooded with phony ten spots - Mrs M Falkenburg ( Jinx Jmx s moth mother mother mother er ) will wlIi folio v in m her daughter s foot footsteps footsteps footsteps steps and become a Conover model modelIrvmg modelIrving I IIrvmg Irvmg Irving Berlin Berlln has two songs songson songson songson on the H t Parade at oncelDOIlS once oncel oncelDons ! Dons DOIlS Doris Duke shoves off of ! for Honolulu Honolulushortiy Honolulushortly Honolulushortly shortiy shortly accompanied accompiDled : by a boogie boogiewoogle boogiewoogie boogiewoogie woogle woogie teacher She will spurn the theotIer theoffer theoffer otIer offer of a fashion mag post in m PareeA PareeA Paree PareeA dropping20 A famed photo mag ) Is s droppmg dropping 20 p c of its roster as is a b g gI I sN gN N Y ayem paper A mobster mobsterwho mobsterwho mobsterwho who tells the underworld the mayor mayorcrossed mayorcrossed mayorcrossed crossed him bun threatens to erase erasehim erasehim erasehim him when he gets outa out 4 . a I I |