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Show I 'E E ' SI $ : EEN ; ; & EARD EARDTip 1lD 1 ; IMAIN ST ET ! I II I I I Tip to 1\Iotorlsts 1 Iotorlsts Motorists 1IotorlstsWATCH MotoristsWATCH \ MotoristsWATCH WATCH THE CAR BEHIND THE THElONE THEONE THEONE ONE IN FRONT OF YOU . * . * . lONE ' Twin Twm beds are all very well well"said wellsaid , , " said the blushing ' bride to Ralph RalphMillel RalphMiller RalphMlllei Millel Miller in m the furniture department departmentof I RalphI of the Co-d,1 Co d,1 d1 Co-b Co b Co-c c - , ? t . , "but but " of course ccurse ceurse there thereJS thereis thereis JS is no use buying buymg them until unhl we get getI getthe getthe getthe I the twins twms " T . . . I Some men : are Ire born meek meekII meekOthers meekOthers II Others g'ct gct get ' married malTled * . * . * . Advice to DocWrs Doctors DocWrsHow DoctorsHow DoctorsHow How to cure nervousness nel"V'Jusness nelVJusness " ' - tell tellspur tellspur tellyour spur patient it 1t is 1S a sign of advancing ad- ad advancing ad advancing - vancing years * . * . * . FOR SALE-A SALE A SALE - - A full-blocdcd full blocdcd full-blocded blocded - cow cowglvmg cowgiving glvmg vmg 3 gallons milk , . 2 tons of ofhay ofhay ofhay hay , a lot of chickens and a cook- cook cooks cookstoveAdv cook-s cook s - s stove-Adv stove Adv t o 0 v eA e -A A - A d v in Montsano Monhano MontsanoWash , , ( Wash ! ) Vidette . * . * . Defirutlon Definition DefinitionFUTILE DefinitionFUTILE . FUTILE Like trying to pick p1ck up u3 upa u3a upfiea u3flea u { $ a aflea flea fiea fieaith ' \ with \\ith ith a pair palr of boxing boXlng gloves * . * . * . POl\-1E POl 1E POME POl1EBeneath POMEBeneath POMEBeneath \ - Beneath this thJS stone rests all that'sleft that'sleft that's thats that'sleft ' leftor leftor left leftOf Of or l\-I l I \ - Motorist torlst HarryVIute Harry \VIute VIute White ' \ White.lie Whitelie . . lie He made a dandy left hand turnBut turn , I But signaled to the ncht fight right . . . * . * . * . Ross Thomson "I I " would like to toget toget toget get a good book , please " Mrs Shafer , . librarian hbrarian hbrariarr ' ' ' 'Some Some Some- 'Something ' Sometlung Something - thing tlung light ? " Ross " ' "It It " doesn't doesnt doesn.t ' . matter I Ive ve ye gotmy gotmy got gotmy my car here " * . t * . * . Puzzle Department Department'I'lungS DepartmentThings DepartmentThings 'I'lungS IlungS Things ' we'll well ' never understandWhy understandWhy understand understandWhy Why they call them "pennanent pennanent "permanent permanent "pennanentwa "permanentwaves "permanentwaves permanentwaves " wa waves vec ; . " What 9 a , woman driver dnver means meanswhen meanswhen when ' " hen she shc holds out her hand . . Why biff big robbers fobbers cct get short terms termsand termsand termsand and little guys long ones . How sailors sallors get into those hght tight hghtpants tightpants tightpants pants . How flow they get out of 'cm cm 'em em ' . * . * . Yes , this is 1S Mr 'Arrison Arrison 'Arrlson Arrlson ' Cawn'tj Cawn'tyou Cawn'fc Cawnfc Cawn't Cawnt Cawn'fcou ' j you ou understand ? " " 'Arrison Arrison Amson ' ' + Haitchhay Haitch , , . hay , . two t0 t\\ t \ 0 hars , a hi , a hccs hers hc ; s . , , a ho anda and anda a hen ' + * . . * . Advice to Bois BoisIf Bo ) sIf s sIf If your s1ster sister sisters s boy fnend dcesn dcesnttreat t ttreat ttreat treat you right , . put 'Put ' quinine in herface herface her herface face p pow powder < m der . . * . * . Sgirl S * . 0gul 0\ 0 \ gnl gul girl recently " was "as as absent horn from hornhome fromhome fiomhome home for a couple of days . , , and her hermother hermother hermother mother was much concerned but buteeJ"Ythmg butesefyt bute\erything bute erything e\eJ"Ythmg e eJ"Ythmg eJYthmg eeJ"Ythmgas esefyt \ " ; .ing ing . \ was \\as as \ all right nght when "hen hen " the I II I lass returned with a Gideon B1ble Bible B1bleunder Bibleunder Bibleunder under her arm ann . * . * . 1 Little Jinunie JImmie , has bas io to lake take the thefourth thefourth thefourth fourth grade over again agam on ac- ac account account ac account - - count of ot dyspepsia . . He could could- couldn't couldn't - n't nt ' spell it . . . * . ' No Now , . , . " f > said 31d the super-salesman super salesman - - . , I 'tJus tJus ' this in instrument . , > tnnnent turns green if 1f th the theliquor th6Uqirsr j lliqu liquor r is good-red good red good--red good - - - red if 1 ! it is badIt bad It " ItII II ' Sony , , . but ' I'm Im ' color blind ItI Got Gotnnytlung Gotanything Gotanything I nnytlung anything with a gong in W it its ? > ' . . * . j jA A lot of men ask for a candid candidopinion candidopinion candidopinion opinion , . when " , what hat they want is JS a acandied acandled acandied candied candled opinion aI I . * . . I IDefinItIon DefinItIonLOVE DefinitionLOVE Definition DefinitionLOVE LOVE . That something which whichmakes whichmakes whichmakes makes a young man think that a aa aagirl agirl agirl girl who wh'o ' is catty at home will w111 wdll be beangelic beangelic beangelic angelic after he mames marries her . * . . Rev Parks says that every C\ery C ery \ time timehe timehe timehe he addresses an audience auwence and says sayssomething fcayhsomething y somethmg something about " 'looking looking "Iookmg Iookmg 'gookmg gookmg ' into your yourbright yourbright yourbright bright and shining shmmg faces , " about aboutsldy aboutsilly aboutsixty sldy silly po powder dcr puffs immediately getinto get getinto into action . |