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Show SE.EN SEEN $ 1ENtad . EEN : d HEARD nEAIID HEARDl HEARDi ! - < e > = > /l l " ' / ? HEARDMMNh l"MAIN - "MAIN MAIN " MAIN STREET STDEET STREETIn i /MMNh MMNh / MMNhIn In a 3 recent book Mary Roberts RobertsRhmehart RobertsRhinehart RobertsRhmehart Rhmehart Rhinehart , telling of a resourceful resourcefulgrandmother resourcefulgrandmother resourcefulgrandmother grandmother , . slid said s id 'Completely Completely ' un- un untrained un-tialned un tialned - ttained trained and with no openings out- out outside outside out outside - side of s school hool teacher for'tomen for \'tomen 'tomen tomen women 'tomenm womenin \ ' womenin m in these days da.s das ) . she fell back en hel her helneedle herneedle heineedle needle . " But did you read about the man manho manwho manwho \\ho ho who \ ; sat eat down on the spur of the themonment themonment themonmenfc monment . * . . . Try TQ and remember the th1 things thingsyou thingsyou gs gsyou you " were "ere ere worrying worrrng ) about a year yearago ) vcarago car carago ago ago"All * . . . "All All " my success my financial financialprestIge financialprestige financialprestige prestIge ; , ' declared the big magnate , 'I I ' I owe to just one me thmg-pluck thmg pluck thing-pluck thing thing - pluckpluck , pluck pluck ' But of couise comse course he knew just justwhere justwhere justwhere where to find the people to pluck . * . * . Defin1tion Definition Defin1tionGREAT DefinitionGREAT DefinitionGREAT GREAT LEADER One who nev- nev never nev never - . er permits his foIlo\\ foIlo followers foIloers \ ers to discover discoverhe discoverhe discoverhe he is as dumb as they are . . $ . Some ome m1nled miriied mm ied men say they have haveno haveno liavcno no affection for their old sweet sweet- sweethearts sweethearts sweethearts - hearts Others admit the truth . * . . Bachelors may pay the lid- lid liddlcr fid fiddler . - dler dlcr , , as Shakespeare or IrVID Irvin IrVIDCobb IrvinCobb IrvinCobb Cobb sa1 said , but married men menpay menpay menpay pay the whole dern Bern band , notes notesDad notesDad notesDad Dad Gumnut . . . * . . . Percy Whiffletree Whiflletree escaped dI- dI dIvorce divorce di divorce - vorce by a hair He noticed it lt on onhIS onhis onhis hIS coat sleeve before his wife wifecould wifecould wifecould could see It"Defination itDefinition it 'Definition Definition "Defination Defination " ' 'Definitioni Definitioni ' i i . * . . INTELLIGENT GIRL- GIRL GIRLOne - ' One who whocan whocan whocan can refuse aiT3ss J.1dss J1dss t1i1Iss ' . : without being bemg de- de depnved deprived de deprived - - prived pnved ' of 'Of ft . ' " ' r ) - . , . . ! "ShouJd"a'man ShouJdaman "ShouItTar ShouItTar "Should"a Shoulda " " ' man keep anythmg anything anythmgfrom anythingfrom anythingfrom from his h1s 1 t ' tnfe mfe 'ife ife ? ' ! " asked the theyoung theyoung theyoung young brideeroom bridegroom . "Just Just " enough for Cor lunches lunchestobacco , . tobacco and car fare . , " , " replied repliedDad repliedDad repliedDad Dad Gununlt Gummlt Gummit . . . * . * . Very few . women v.omen vomen are Commumsts Communists CommumstsNone CommunistsNone CommunistsNone None of them are as red as they theyare theyare theyare are painted * . * . . theyI I , \ P01\fE P01 fE POME POMEHe POMEHe \ He blacked blacke , my eye eyeAnd eyeAnd eyeAnd : And cra cracked ed my dome ; I didn't didnt d1dn't d1dnt ' knowHer knowHer know knowHer Her husband " was "as as homeTaxes home . . . Taxes are higher this yeai yeal year and andwill andwill andwill will beOlSe be woise \\OlSe OlSe noise \ in 1937 , they tell us usAnd usAnd usAnd And just to think thmk we once went to toar towar towar \\ar ar war \ \ over a tax on tea ' toI I . . . I Bragging may not get busmess business businessbut businessbut but did you ever see a man who whohad whohad had caught a big fish , dodgingdown dodging dodg111g dodgingdown Ido do\\ do down don \ \ n an alley \ with lth if It ? > I * . . . DefimtionOLD DefinitionOLD Definition Defimtion OLD TIMER The one who can canremembel canremember canremembci remembel remember the swish sW1sh made by ablack ablack a ablack black . sateen petticoat I petticoatI * . . . Before marriage , a man manyearns manyearns manyearns yearns for a ' woman 'Woman . After mar mar- marriage marriage . - riage nage the Y is silent sllent * . * . * . Men may be fools to many marry but butcomments , comments Lena Gensterho Genster , . \ who \\ho ho elseIS elseis else elseis is there foi fOl for 'a a \ ' women omen to marry ? * . . * . Client Chent "III III "I I " 111 11 give vou you ten dol- dol dollam dol dollars - . lars lam if j you au will sill \ \ 111 do my worrying for forme forme forme me " Mitchel Melich Mel1ch 'That's Thats That's ' ' a bal- bal bar- bar balgain bargain bai-gain bai gain - gain gainVhere \ Where \Vhere Vhere s the ten ten9 ? " Client CHent ' "That's Thats 'That's That's " ' your first worry ' " . * . . Telephone operatorHer operator , ' \ iftcr \Her Her 'tiler tiler dn111k drunk dn111khad drunkhad drunkhad had put a nickel mekel in 111 nt the slot "Num Num "Num- "Number "Number "Number " dn111kI - I ber please " "Number Number " . , . Poof Poofl ! Come , , come comegirlie , , gnhe girlie , , wheresh m ' ' peanuts ? " i i I |