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Show McGoofey's McGoofeys C 00 e ' S SA First Reader and @ Texeyitpen rimerTexeyitpen TexeyitpenEclectic , e\\lp.pera elp.pera e lp.pera lppera elp.peraC A Auoc'l.t Auocl.t Auoclt \ ocleted ocletedervlc . ' . . d dE E Eclectic C 1 ectlc Ct CtEdited iC P Primer Primers rln1er rimer rln1erSenle rimers . Senle s , ervlc 'u u ' . I Edited hy by H . I . PHILLIPS PHILLIPSrw -rw rw - . I Iac f V ac ; - ( I I Is _ 'a a ' f f fdeSta s f f deSta ! ! , THE STORY OF AGATHA1Agatha AGATHA I-Agatha I Agatha 1-Agatha 1 1 - Agatlia seemed normal as a ababy ababy ababy baby . 2-She 2 She 2 - She was even what was called calleda a bright chIld3She child3She child 3-She 3 She - 3 - She could talk talh before she was wasa wasa wasa a year old and at the age of eight elght- elght eighteen elghteen elghteen - een months she \ ' was nas as so smart she shecould shecould shecould could read re'1d re1d reed ' Mother Goose4Dver Goose4Ever Goose 4-Dver 4 Dver 4-Ever Ever - 4 - Everybody } body stid stld staid she was won wonderful wonderful wonderful derful derful5She 5-She 5 She - 5 - She \ was as very fond of music musicand musicand musicand and dancing dancmg Wlien When company came cameshe cameshe she always danced for themGIn themCIn them themC G-In G In C-In C - C - In grammar school she was wasthe wasthe wasthe the brightest girl In the class and andthe andthe andthe the liveliest She still loved to playand play playand playand and dance7She dance7She dance 7-She 7 She 7 - She took tool , . part In all the ama ama- amateur amateur amateur - teur entertainments , ne\ ne never neer \ er failing failingto fallingto to put on a dancing d'lnclng dlnclng ' specialty specialtyUverybody specialtyEverybody specialtyEverybody Uverybody Everybody said s'lid slid ' she had a mal mattel mattelous maivelous \ el elous ous sense of rhythm8They rhythmSThey rhythm rhythmS 8-They 8 They S-They S - S - They even called her a sec second secand second ond and Pavlowa Pavlo\\a Pavlo a Pavlossa Pavlossa9Her \ Pavloa9IIer 9-IIer 9 IIer 9-Her Her - 9 - Her paients palents patents gave her a mu muslcal musteal musical slcal steal education , too , and she could couldplay couldplay couldplay ' play the piano brilliantly . IG-She IG She 10-She 10 10 - - She seemed to be uc a most tal talented taleoted talented ented eoted young lady and great greet gre ' things thingswere thingswere thingswere were predicted tor for her There 1here ' was wastall wastalk wastalk tall talk , . of concert toursllBut tours11But tours ll-But ll But 11-But 11 11 - But the pace ! back Jack homeas home \as as was wastoo \ wastoo , astoo too slow for her . 12-She 12 She 12 - She couldn't couldnt ' wait walt watt , and so soshe soshe soshe she packed pacb.ed pacbed . up and ran away a\\ay a ay assay \ ' to the thebig thehag thebig big hag city , the land of opportunity opportunitywhere opportunitywhere opportunitywhere where a girl could express e.press epress ) . herselffreely herself herselffreely herselffreely freely freely13rour freely13roar 13-rour 13 rour 13-roar roar 13 - Four or fh five file e years later some someof someof someof of the folks folk foIl , . & : . back bacI . home receIved receIvednews receivednews receivednews news of her . 14-Sbe 14 Sbe 14-She She 14 - She Iiad had become a marathon marathondancer marathondancer marathondancer dancer after a disappointing ex- ex expel experience es-peilence es peilence - pel perience ience plaving playing pIa ) Ing- Ing Ingthe - the piano In a anlcl anlcl anicl nlcl oletMORo.L oletMORAL olet oletMORL MOR\L- MOR L MORo\.L MORo.L MORo .L MORAL- MORAL MORLIt MORALIt \ . - . It all aU depends depend on thebreahs thebreaks the thebreaks breakse breaks breahs e * . t * . s . sCURIOUS CURIOUS FACTS FOR FORCURIOUS FORCURIOUS FORCURIOUS CURIOUS PEOPLESeth PEOPLE PEOPLESeth Seth P Throttleponk Throttleponh Tlirottleponk of Wapplng Wapping Wappingers Wapplngers ers Falls , N . Y , has been putting puttingthe puttingthe the left 1 lubber uuuer iubber on the right foot footfor footfor for 45 years It's Its ' believed to be a arecord arecord arecord arecordThere record recordThere There Is a circus In Zanzibar Zanzibarwhich Zanzibarwhich Zanzibarwlilch which has no trained sealsBugg sealsBuggy seals sealsBuggi Buggi Bugg Buggy stripingIs striping striping- - Is among the poor poor- poorest poorest poorest - est paid professions on Manhattan Manhattanisland ManhattanIsland Manhattanisland ManhattanislandA island islandA A waste wastp basket bashet placed upsIde upsIdedown upsidedown upsidedown down In the average newspaper of- of office of office . - ficelll fice \ ' will \\lll lll catch just as much paper paperas paperas . as If right side upThe upThe up upThe The average pea pod holds eight eightpeas eightpeas eightpeas peas but no QsOnly QsOnly Qs QsOnly Only very sery \ ery dull mice will wlll attemptto attempt to gnaw a hole in a wooden legA legA leg legA A s , very ery excellent apple pie can canbe canbe canbe be made by leaving out the seeds seedsand seedsand seedsand and stems , but It Is t \ very ery rarely at- at attempted attempted at attempted - temptedOh tempted . . . Oh . , see thegirl thegirl the then n girl e 1 ! 3 What Is as thegirl thegirl the girl doing doingij ? b ' The .rhe rhe ' . girl isa IsdrIvIng Is a O .t t . driving an automobile auto'i auto 'i i ' " mobile mobileDoes Does the girl girlk gir : r k know now how to todrive tot t | drive an auto auto- automobile automobile - mobileJ | mobile ? No , but she shehas shehas shihas has been driving drivingone drivingone drivin ; one for five years yearsWhat yearsWhat yearsWhat What Is she going to do now nowShe ? ' She Is going oln to make a left turn turnHow turnHow turnHow How will wlll she con\ con cons convey coney \ ey this warn warnIng warnlag warnIng Ing lag to traffic behind her herYou ? You can never ne\er ne er neser \ tell . . that thnt the correet correct correetsignal correctsignal correctsignal signal when you are about to makea mahea mahe make a left turn Is to hold out the left lefthand lefthand lefthand hand and point to the left ? Yes . , she knows hnows all about aboot that , but butshe butshe butshe she will wllI probably prob'1bly prob1bly ' turn \ without lthout hold holdIng holdlag holdIng Ing lag her hand h'lnd hlnd ' out at all allSuppose allSuppose allSuppose Suppose this causes her car to tobe tobe tobe be rammed by the man behind ? Then she " will "Ill Ill sill leap lenp out of the thecar thecar thecar car with a mo most ' > t Injured e'Cpresslon eCpresslon eepresslon e'Cpresslonand eepresslonand expressionand " ' and exclaim c\clalm c clalm ecclaim " \ : to the they " other drh driver drier er : "What's Whats " ' the matter ? Don't Dont ' you youbnow youknow yonLnow bnow know how to drive drhe a n car C'lr Clr ' ? ' ' ' ' ' "Will Will " " , she he win the argument ? ' Did you e ever eser , er know Inow , a woman wom'ln womln ' tJ tJlose tJlose tJlose lose one ? Suppose the girl ? lrl Irl Intended to make makea a right turn Instead of ot a left turn turn.then turnthen . , then what signal slgnnl \ would ould she give glvc ? ' ' ' Then she would signal for a left leftturn leftturn leftturn leftturnAre turn turnAre Are von sure ? Positive Pot1ve Po < ; \t1ve t1ve \ 1 ! 1And And what whnt If Ir she Intended to come cometo cometo cometo to a n full fun stop In fast hst traPc trafPc tralPe ( ? In that case slie she woul would slmplv simply slmplvstop simplystop simpivstop stop . Without holding holdllg holdlag : out her hand band ? Absotlvely Absotively Absottvely . You mean she wouldn't wouldnt ' hold out outher outher outher her hand at all ? Not until untll after the accident . How do you - explain c-\.plaln c.plaln c .plaln plaln \ . that women womenalways womenalways womenalways always behave like Uke that when dr1Ing drib- drib driblag driv dr1\ dr1 driving \ - . ing lag automobiles ? It'b Itb It's Its It ' all done by mirrors . . . . . GRAMMAR TESTWhich TEST TESTWhich Which is correct : 1- 1 1The 1 - 'The The ' The telephone operator got gotthe gotthe gotthe the right number without delay , " or or"It or"It or"It orIt "It It " took tooh fifteen minutes to get a aconnection aconnection aconnection connection and then it was the thewrong thewrong thewrong wrong number " ? 2-"The 2 "The The - 2 - "The The " restaurant strawberry strawberryshortcahe strawberryshortcake strawberryshortcake shortcahe shortcake was full of luscious ripe ripeberrles ripeberries ripeberries berrles berries , , " , " or " "It It " must have been an anoptical anoptical anoptical optical illusion " ? 3- 3 3rurope 3Europe 3 - 'Europe Europe rurope ' : will ultimately pay payUncle payUncle payUncle Uncle Sam S'1m S1m ' all aU slie she owes him , " , " or or"Durope or"Europe or"Europe orEurope " " Uncle UncleSam UncleSam UncleSam "Durope Durope "Europe Europe shall ultimately ultlm'1tely ultlm1tely ' pay Sam all an she owes him " ? And Is it ita ita ita a goofy remark In either case ? ' 4- 4 - 4I 4 - ' ' I droe drov dro\ dro dros \ e a the golf ball 380 3S0 yarde yards yardsstraight yardsstraight : ; straight down don do\\ do dos \ n the falr\\ falr fairts fairway falray \ ay , " , " or "Idnved Idnved "I I "Idrlved "Idrived " drlved drived the golf ball b'1ll b1ll ' 380 yards yardsstraight yardsstraight yardsstraight straight down own the fairway fmrw'1Y fmrw1Y ' " ? Why Whyare Whyare Whyare are both statements Implausible ? K . 4 . ' S * . SLITERARY LITERARY TESTCheck TEST TESTCheck Check the \ words ords which properly properlycomplete properlycomplete properlycomplete complete these sentences : 'I I ' I remember , I remember , the thehouse thehouse thehouse house where I was \ \ as born " are linesfound hnes lines hnesfound linesfound found in lD a poem called"The calledThe called"TheShooting called . . . . . . . . . ' "The The "TheShooting " ' .rhe rhe .rheShooting . Shooting of Dan McGrew ' . . . "Sleep Sleep "SleepBaby SleepBaby " , , Baby , Sleep"Boots SleepBoots Sleep " . . . . . . . "Boots Boots " " . . . . . . . "IRemember "J J "I I "JRemember " 1 1Remember Remember , I Remember Hemember " 1 ' Fuzzy 'ruzzy ruzzy Wu7zy WU7t.y WU7ty . was \ written rltten by by.John byJohn . . . . . . . . . .John John . Greenleaf Greenle.lf Greenlelf . Whittler Whittier . . . . . . . . . Don Marquis Iarquis . . . . . . . Louis LOUlS Louts Unterme Untermeyer Unter- Unter Untermeicr - meicr meyer me er . . . . . . Joyce Kllmer Kilmer . . . . . . . . . Rudyard Rud Hud ard KIplingFltz KiplingFitz Kipling KiplingFitz Fitz Fltz Gicene Gleene Gieeue Halleck Hallech wrote . . . . . "Birbara Birbara "Brbara "B B " " \rbara rbara irbara \ I ritchie rltclue ritchle ' . . . , . . . . . . . . 'Maud Maud 'MaudMuller ' MaudMuller ) Iaud IaudMuller Muller ' ' . . . . . . . . . 'The The ' . The Wreck of theHesperus theHesperus the theHesperus Hesperus " . . . . . . . . "Marco Marco " Iarco Bozzaris Bozzarls ' . . . . . . . . . . . ' . 'Old Old ' Old Ironsideb Ironslde Ironsides " The lines Unes "Not Not " of the princes and andprelates andprelates andprelates prelates " with "lth lth periwigged per1Igged perhsigged per1\\ per1 \ \ Igged charac charac- characters characters characters - - ters , marching triumphantly lau laurelIed laurelied laurelied relIed to lap the fat of the years years'are yearsare ' are found In in'The inThe . . . . . . . . . ' The VillageBlacksmith VillageBlacksmith Village VillageBlacksmith Blacksmith " . . , . . . "River River " Stay Awayrrom Awayrrom Away AwayFrom rromIy From rrom My \Iy Iy : \ Door Door'The DoorThe " . . . . 'The The ' The Old OakenBucket OakenBucket Oaken OakenBucket Bucket " . . . . . . 'Consecration Consecration ' " . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "Old Old " Mother Hubbard ITubbard " S . M . MGENERAL . GENERAL INFORMATIONCheck INFORMATION INFORMATIONCheck Check the \ ' word ord or \ ' words ords that thatproperly thatproperly thatproperly properly complete these statements : California oranges come from from.Idaho fromIdaho . . . . Idaho . . . . . . . .Rhode Rhode . Island . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ' . California . . . . . . . Loulsl Loulsi Louisl Loulslana Loulsiana Louislana ana . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . New .New . N ew J Jersey er ey . . . , . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Floiida Floiida Flouda .Flotida Flotida . FloudaBacon .FlotidaBacon .FloiidaBacon Bacon Is procured from . . . . . . . . . . cows CO\\S CO S cots \ . . . . . . . . . , . horses . . . . . . . . plciS plus pl s . . . . . . . . . . . .fig fig .flg flg . trees . . . . . . . . . . , bluefishguinea bluefishguinea blueflsli bluefish blueflsliguinea guinea hen hensViolin henb hens henbViolin Violin strings are made from . . . . . , . cigjr clg.lr clglr cigar . butts . . . . . .rabbits rabbits .rabblts rabblts . ' feet . . . catgut . . . . . peach pe'1ch pe1ch ' stones . . . . . .old old . old oldshoes .oldshoes .oldshoes shoes . . . . . . . .cabbage cabbage .c.lbb'lge c.lbblge clbblge . . . ' heads headc headsPumpkins headsPumpkins : ; Pumpkins pumpl.lns pumpllns . are . . . . . . . . . . .v v . egetables eget'1ble eget1ble .segetables segetables \ ' , > . . . . . . . . . animals anIn1als . . . . . . . . minerals minerais mIneralsAlfonso mineraisAlfonso mineralsAlfonso Alfonso was formerl formerly . king 1.ing 1ing of . . .Russia Russia . Russia . . . . . . . . . Poland Pohnd . . . . . . Chile . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Mexico Iexlco . . . . . . . . . . Spain . . . . . . . . . . . . .East East . ast LynnRumania LynnRumania Lynn LynnRumania Rumania is a country in . . . . . . . . Australia . . . . .South South . Amerka America . . . . . . . . . Asia . . . . . . . . . .North North . America . . . . . . . . . . . - . . . . . . . . .Iceland Iceland . . . A leading e export "port port " of S\\ S Sts SItzerland Switzerlandyellow \ Itzerland Itzerlandyellow itzerlandyellow yellow squash squash.uncut squashuncut . . . . . . uncut diamondschop diamondschop diamonds diamondschop chop suey . , .S\\ .S .Swiss Swiss .SIss . Ss \ ' Iss chocolate . , , .coffee coffee .coITl'e .coITle coITle . ' . . . . . . . . . .bananas bananas . . . . PSALMS OF LIFEDeliberation LIFE LIFEDeliberation DelaberationTake DeliberationTake Deliberation Delaberation DeliberationTake Take lh living ing very calmly , Develop poise and pace ; The tortoise , you remember , Came through and won the tlle raceDo race raceDo Do nothing in a hurry , For ror haste h'lste hlste ' , they sjy S.1y S1y say . , makes mab.es mabes . waste wasteThe , , The belter helter skelter personArouses personArouses person personArouses Arouses mucli much distaste dlstast distasteA ! A certain SCIl sense ' > C of timingIn timing timingIn In every c\ery c ery \ deed and net act netwm actWill actWill wm Will help he1p achieve achiee achiese achie\ achie \ e perfectioni perfectionAnd perfection perfectionAnd i And make each e'1ch e1ch ' step exact e.act eact exactDon't ) . . . I IDon't Don't Dont ' dash about too "wlmyAs swiftlyAs " swiftly "wlmy wlmy swiftlyAs As If to break your neck ; . The over 0er 0\ 0 oteractite \ er acth active e personBecomes personBecomes person personBecomes Becomes a nervous \ wreck reck . . Go slow an and unhurriedAbout unhurriedAbout unhurried unhurriedAbout About each task tash you do-- do do- doYour doYour do doYour - - ( Your boss bo'ls bols ' will then find flnd some onr one oneTo onrTo on To take the place plnce of you ' ) |