Show PUTTING EM OVER OYER 1 With Bugs Baer J Copyright 1916 by the Press Publishing Pub Pub- lishing Co l- l t RACING 1 1 May MayBe May Mayg g a Be th the aine Sport of p Kings but the Bookies Always At- At ways Seem to toBe Be Holdi Holding g WD Aces y You cant can't put up a tUck nip battle by taking a a. nip hip first ANY WEEK END AUTO TOUR TOUR Go south on avenue to boulevard a dangerous c curve that can be betaken betaken taken on two wheels Stop at to pick pedestrians out of carburetor Go slowly through the village of at as It has a speed limit of two miles which Is th the reason reason It Is a village at Dangerous hairpin turn near McGurk's tavern but more dangerous corkscrew screw turns Inside of It Stop at Squirrel crossing to pick out of radiator Crossroads at Turn either to the right or 0 wrong Tour ends at No auto ever gets through Choice of fifty ducats fin fine or the month of June In the cooler Constable wont won't take tobacco coupons Going like a a. house afire is all aU right but a house afire doesn't lat last long The scheme to send Walter Waite Johnson to Cleveland has fallen through as Wilkes barre announces that It would never grant waivers waiver on him Some Fed league reps arent outliving the Fed ired league by many moons The war In Europe has completely stopped golf which makes us dread peace more than ever Theres There's one thing we always admired about the Intercollegiate A A. A A A. A A A. A A. A It just makes a paragraph In case cate of 01 war some patriots would sim simply ply buy a bigger megaphone The English language take takes man many a beating but the bird who wrote the Cornell Cor nell crew took the Yale shells shell's dust cops the pewter disc When Simpson of 01 Missouri limped lImed the yard hurdles in 14 4 5 they said It was accidental When he did It if it again they said sald it was an accident This is the first accident we ever that stuttered Boston claims to be able to raise men in case of 01 war when they couldn't even raise Tris Speaker this s season ason July turns turM In a. a a verdict of suicide whenever when ever a Cleveland baseball fan goes near neara a squirrel THE WEAK SPOT The colle college e nine had Just been bested Cash and glory from em wrested The campus green was clogged with gobs of 01 The buck was passed up to the coaches Heroes once they now were roaches The und had dropped their tough earned dough Even though the dope had tumbled The coaches were not one whit humbled In their gUms there gleamed enlightenments enlighten ments ment's beam Easily they flashed Hashed the reason reason- For the first time In the season They had bad played a a. student on the team Having a a. seat in a varsity eight seems to be about as permanent as an ant on a hot rock Game Gam Jaws laws do not prevent some folks from chasing wild geese all the year round The team that that wins games will win the pennant which means about a as much to the Ute Pirates as a wardrobe does to Eva We are In n favor of outdoor wr wrestling Until we saw an outdoor wrestling match we never neve knew why farmers prayed for rain Baseball Is making great strides in Japan Japan Japan Ja Ja- Ja- Ja pan and China where the players are too gentlemanly gentl t to accuse each other of being being be be- ing yellow Baseball scouts are keeping a sharp glim on Connie Macks Mack's infield which looks about ready to graduate Seems to be a consensus of opinion among Jack Dillon that he is a pretty good fighter Jack Dillon DUlon is so 80 anxious to meet Frank Frankl Moran that he will fight for tor only l which Is a tearful fearful sacrifice considering that It would only take lake Jack about el eight ht years to earn earn that puny amount outside the Uhe tha ring Villas Villa's troops are chasing our army out of MexIco Just like an Infuriated mouse chases chase a cat ANSWERS TO Katz Weighing Fatz-Weighing Weighing pounds shouldn't hinder you from a a. baseball career now that they build benches out of at concrete Grid Spring Grid Spring football is over f for r the tho spring but we stilt still have mosquitoes and sunburn left |