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Show ' ' " MATCHINO WIT. : ' A CaJIfornlan and New Ea- (lander wer matching- stories. 'Why.- aald tha CaJIfornlan. " grow cabbage ao big that aa army of soldiers can oamp undar on. Thai's nothlna-." aald tha Naw Bnrlandar. -wa maka coppar kaulaa In New Ensland aa bin that a thou- amud man can ba rtvatlns ana and yat ba ao far apart thay can't haar aaeh othar hammar.1 ' -Oo an. aald tha CaUfornlan. what would anr ofM aw a kattla of that alma for?" "Why, to boll your California, eabbaca In." aald tha Maw Enland-arBoatoa Enland-arBoatoa Oloba. . . , " . I, A nrt f hata i ; la Wlnnta Bratta . s. J ' eha klda yon oa -. - . But narar pat a. . T INTtRKSTINa NIW ITEMS. fDalavan, III, Adwtlaar-Tlmea.) kr. and Mro. John Wlamar, prom-Inant prom-Inant paoplo of our city, hava baby and thay rot U In P aorta. It . , la thraa waaka old and a, trl tha awaataat llttla laaala yon avar aaw. Mra. Wlamar la atanalyaly anraad (Editorial tn Waatilnrton, 0. C y Harald.) f Glrla with axparianca in ooontrr Khoola In naarby Maryland and Vlrclnla form axeallant malarial from which dty taaehara can ba moldad. 8ha eomaa to tha Dtatrlet and la dlalllualonad. 8ha fin da that tha coat of lovlns la twloa or thrlca that to which aha la aocuatomad. (Goldcndala, Waah, Santlnal.) Sarvlcaa at t:0. Sunday nlht. -s. Subject. "Hall, a Flaca of Etarnal . Punishment." All ara- walcama. Waltar O'Hara. paator. Gatharad for Evarybody iUg Ina for Auyuat. ' Tha auto ha takan tha plaea of tha porch awlns an tha moat potent po-tent adjunct nacaaaary to rat a huaband. A toad hopa, ' i A bird flopa, A run popa, A flab, dropa. Than thay find tnlnra Maw, A dor trota, , A town lota, . A pan dota. But man atopa Whan ha aught to go. At YOU LOOK AT IT. y Aeeordlnr to tha paaalmlat; ara In a tanibla atata; tlmaa ara bad. trada la dull. Evarybody la rattln rdlvorcad; tha yaunr aaopla ara appalllnr. Evarybody rata drunk; tho world haa bacoma com- l plataly Oodlaaa. And thara will ba 1 a revolution next weak. V Aeeordlnr to tha optlmtat, tha wort dla ail rlrht. Nina marrlarea ' In tan ara aucceaaful; rna la abort sklrta remain tha aama aa In crinoline. crino-line. On heara much about drink but aaaa llttla. Crtm Itaalf la de-eraaalnr- Tha future wlU take car of lualf, aa did tha past. |