OCR Text |
Show j SHORT STORY OF THE DAY j DA2J8Y MAO AND THE LUNATIC. I went to the south of Ireland for my last holiday on a short visit to a near relative, the resident medical superintendent superin-tendent of the K asylum. The train dropped me at a small country coun-try station, two miles or so from my destination and about four from the' nearest town. There were several post-cars post-cars waiting. I entered into satisfactory satisfac-tory negotiations with a man named Darby Mac and took my seat. "Where to, surrT inquired Darby. "The asylum." "Which wan. suit? Is it the owld mln's or the deaf and dumb?" "No! no!" said L "neither. The lunatic luna-tic asylum," "Wlsha, now, an is it there you're goin'r "It la." said I. "Glory be to God!" he ejaculated, thoughtfully and quite to himself. Possibly Pos-sibly ho might be a recovered patient. I surmised. The idea awakened a special Interest In him. "You know the place?" I remarked, tentatively. "Bedad, I do know it well and good ralson I have to know it. 'Tis quare experience ex-perience some people gets when they'd sooner be without it, If they had any choice; an' that's tho way it was with me, your honor; I'd as soon see the dlvil as go near it; but sure, a poor man has to live whatever happens." - "There's time to turn back if you have any objection. J can easily get another car." The response was a "Wha-up, Polly!" and three or four flicks of the whip, which set the willing- animal oft at a brisk trot. "With the help o God we'll keep the job this time,' anyhow," said Darby. "Were you put into the Job against your will?" I Inquired. "No, surr, I druv up of my own free will." Strange, I thought. "And did they treat you badly when they got you inside the walls?" "I never was behind the doors, your honor, thank heaven! It was bad enough without that." Clearly there was something wrong with him or had been. It would be better bet-ter for me not to rouse him or awaken old memories. It would manifestly be most inconvenient if bo went out of his mind before I got to the end of my Journey. Jour-ney. I beat about for something comforting com-forting to say to him. "Of course, all I want you to do Is to drop me at the door." I said. "That's how I got Jet into it at all once before, surr." "But nobody expects you this time?" "They didn't expect me the time be- that forgot himself an' seemed bothered a bit after gettln' struck on the side of the head. Well, your honpr, I'm telling no lie when I say I could see his eyes shlnln' In tho distance, like you'd seo the windeys on a lonesome house about sunset. - "But, faith, he wasn't long- coming 'round; and when he did. he let a shout out of him and made straight for me at ton. speed. " With that, opinnln' myself 'round on the gate, I took a Jump right off the car and got landed on the other side safe an' sound. "Thlnkin' to see what he'd be at, I Icoked 'round cautiously, but faith, be gev me no time for contemplation, I promise you. The heart ris up In mo mouth when I see him fuH tilt skirt 'round after me. I gev myself up for lost. "Away with me, 'then, 'round and 'round the mare and the car, at top speed, and he after me. puffin' and blowln' and shoutin' the .Lord save us like a grampus, and me short-winded short-winded after the infiuensa. "Well, surr," to make a long story short, he was gainin' on me every mln-tit. mln-tit. His big fist was Just within a foot of me, when I made a last dive for a short cut, under the mare's belly, thlnkin' I'd make straight for the hall door. The right foot went clane from under me, and down I came head foremost, fore-most, dead bate. ,With that -he hit me a kick that broke two of my ribs. " 'I'm kilt.' says I. " 'What matter? says he. 'that's tig for you. anyhow, and be to you, for all the trouble you gave me.' "Away with htm, then, as hard as he could lay leg to the ground, and I never Bet eyes on him from that day to this the dlvil fly away with him! When the doctor came out he brought me to the hospital, And I wasn't the better of the Kick and the fright for more than three months. That Is the whole story, surr." "What did the fellow mean by shouting shout-ing 'tig" "? I inquired, when he had recovered re-covered himself a bit. "Mane by it. Is It? Shure, it's a game that boys do be always playin' at school. Wan boy tips the nearest to him, says tig and the man that gets tig has to pass it on to another, and that's what the lunatics were at when I thought they were fighting. The last fellAw that got tig was the hairy owld man, and when his companions made off he made for the car and he never stopped till he 'tigged' me. . "I will tell you, surr. It was the sav-agest sav-agest game that ever I played before or since. - It's anshint and common enough, too. I often see flies playJn' it flyln' about under the ceiling; when there's nothln' fori 'em to ait and nothing noth-ing to do." I The remark was apt. I. too. had often seen flies playing "tlg"'without specially special-ly noticing the fact; and since Darby brought the matter under my notice I have watched them with added Interest from my easy chair vigorously playing-the playing-the game. "Tig" has now for me a permanent Interest. "Well. Darby." I said, when we arrived ar-rived at the lodge gate, "perhaps under the circumstances you'd rather not go up." "If it's all the same to your honor," he replied, touching his hat,' "I'd rather not." J. F. Fuller In Illustrated Bits. fore, neither." "But you say you weren't locked up?" "I wasn't; but I have no taste for madmln. There's always a lot of 'em walking about." I laughed. "You foolish man," I cried. "Don't you know very well that Dr. M wouldn't let them out and about If they were dangerous?" "That's right enough, surr, but wait till I tell you what happened to me and maybe you won't wonder why I'd be nervous. This very day three years ago, heaven between us and harm, I druv another gintleman it might be yourselfup your-selfup to see the doctor. ' " 'Wait for me,' says he, Jumpln' off the sate before wo got to the door; an' runnin' up the steps, 'I won't be more than half an hour.' "I pulled up and settled the nosebag on tho mare, the way she'd be aitin' a bit; and then I sot up fair an' alsy on the sate. There was some madmln scratch! n the walks wld rakes an' weedin' flower beds an' dlggin' hero an' there, but I never took much notice of 'em till all of a sudden they began to gather up into one clump an' to chatter, an they threw down, tho spades an rakes and shovels an' had a regular set-to set-to wid flats one man strlkln' another that was tho nearest to him ah' so they kept peggln' away. "Begor, all at once, after a dlvil of a big scrimmage between 'em, they scattered scat-tered Just while you'd bo sayin Jack Robinson, leavin tho hairy owld fellow |