| Show I Henry Mclemore 1 WASHINGTON One One would think that a man whose business business busi busi- 1 ness keeps him traveling as asIk as mine n Ik much l' l does doe s would j 1 eventually e eve v e n t u ally learn how to pack a suit suit- case e. e caIn In the last n 10 years ears I II have ave ve packed I 1 at atit a a. suitcase it 1 least e a s t 1000 i times foes and the I results are alI alii al always al- al ii t t ways bad I Ih mastered mast mas mas- mastered M h have a v e the me- me mechanics mee t mechanics of e h ani c s packing gI a all 11 McLemore right sight I can cani can i stuff staff things in a bag and sit ion On it to close it as well as the f next fellow but it is what I put fin in in or dont don't put in a suitcase that will finally cause me tobe to tobe tobe be an outcast from society During my travels from one I end of the country to the other I have yet to reach a place with the right clothes in my bag I If jf I were a fugitive from justice the the- officers of the law would s have no trouble finding me All they would have to do would ibe b be to go o to any gathering and pick up p pr the one man there who r was dressed entirely different i. i from anyone else The fact that I j am never dressed the way other people are does not come 1 from any desire to look different lit It is the result of bad judgment bad luck or bad something I Im I'm on a trip right now and every blessed thing I should have with me is back home in a clothes closet The things I have with me are what I needed on my last trip Now I know already al already already al- al ready that on my next trip Ill I'll take the clothes that are now at home and it'll turn out that what I will really need will be the things that I have with me now If I pack light clothes the town r I go to is certain to have one of those unusual spells where the snow flies for the first time in 50 years If I take heavy clothing the town tow i is sure to have an an- unprecedented heat wave But the NO ro 1 pest in my packing packing pack pack- ing troubles is my dinner jacket I have lugged dinner jacket tie shoes studs and black silk socks from Seattle to Key West without without without with with- out once being asked to anything fancier than a your own sandwiches picnic But let me leave that black nuisance at home and Im I'm sure to be asked to 50 places where you cant can't go in a business suit The same goes for sports clothes If I take a mess of sweaters and slacks and what I think is English countryside stuff then I run into situations where everyone is dressed like mourners at a funeral As a result I r come bounding out only to be pointed out cut as a low-grade low fellow who consorts with race racetrack race racetrack racetrack track touts I remember this as I pack for fora a later trip and dont don't take a thing in the sports line I pack only decent dark blue suits and black shoes remindful of achurch a achurch achurch church usher You know what always happens I run into people people people peo peo- who are completely sports- sports minded I have to play tennis in a double-breasted double blue serge number golf in m my very best new Sunday suit and a borrowed suit that my host has rooted out ut of an old trunk inthe in inthe inthe the attic and which has those dashing Annette Kellerman lines There is nothing worse than to have to borrow sports clothes They never fit If you are thin your host is always built along Man Mountain Dean lines and you stagger around in dread of losing your pants If youre you're fat your host is sure to be the type typo that is called Shorty or Skinny Skinny Skin Skin- Skinny ny ny and you have to spend your time holding in your breath and listening for the sound of ripping seams My idea of the perfect existence existence existence exist exist- ence would be to be connected with a carnival or circus and do your living and traveling on one of those yellow trains There would be no suitcases to pack and you'd have everything you own right with you all the time If I were a few years younger I believe Id I'd be tempted to take up acrobatics or juggling something something some some- thing on my nose just to be able to travel on such a train As it is now its it's colder than Billy D Be outside and the only way I can possibly keep warm is to wear both of the thin suits I brought with me |
