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Show xfni.Phillipr P ALL FOB THE BEST Apathy has flown the coop, Unconcern has hit the floor; Selfishness has looped the loop, Dopiness is now no more; Silent are the "gimme" boyi, All obstructors get the "bird"; Gone If all light-hearted poise REALISM ii the wordl n. Now it isn't mere routine, When the dangers round us roll. Just to gambol on the green Waiting for a Gallup poll; Nutty rallies now are out, Stilled are antis this and that; On soap-boxes few now spout . . . We're a nation AT THE BAT! III. Sleeping at the switch is not Now the leading enterprise; Mikes no longer get red hot From the breath of wild-eyed guys; Arguments are down the sink, Discord's had a run-out pill; And no little hlnk-ciink Tries to thwart a nation' will. IV. Now committees full of men Who tre anti-cverything Take the count of "eight . . . nine . . . TEN!" (Though some paid officials cling) ; Pussyfooting now is out. Half-baked ranters stop their acts All the country, there's no doubt. Sees the truth, and faces FACTS! V. Hedgers crawl into a crack, Compromisers dink away; Ten per centers now fall back, Trimmers haven't much to say; RacKeteering labor rats (And a lot of bosses, too), ... Cearr their very costly spats Unaei the red, white and blue. VI. Critic crawl into their shells, Know-It-Alls now take the skids; Experts have bad dizzy spells. Grown-ups do not act like kids; Sunk are armchair leaders all, Hooey has been booted far; Now at last ws stand or fall SEEING THINGS JUST AS THEY ARE! ON THE SPOT ("In case of an air raid alarm. Lie down immediately on your stomach stom-ach . . .") About his paunch Dad was always defiant, But now he wishes be was much more pliant! Debchi. New York will attempt to jail anybody any-body refusing to get off the streets during an air raid warning. If this is really tried we predict that all traffic will be tied up by long lines of Black Marias taking folks to the hoosegow. THE CALL Remember the Arizona! The Cassin, Downes and Shaw! For every one the Japs got Let's make it three or four! Remember th Oklahoma And good old Utah, too! Each hit makes more efficient Old Yankee Doodle-do. FLEET SHAKE-UP . (With apologies tc F.P.A.) ' KimmeJ and Martin and Short they are out! Heeding the umpire's cry; Out, one-two-three' as the scorekeep-ets scorekeep-ets shout "Tinker to Jacobs to Pye!" . PEGGED You must pay the piper Is what I was taught, And I've always found it A distressing thought. But now, with costs soaring, I think it is nice To know that the piper Cannot raise his price! Anne Linn. If the rubber shortage gets serious what will this country do for chicken sandwiches. And clam chowder? AIN'T IT SO Of all poor friends on whom to call The "friendly neutral" tops 'em alL , a a Elmer Twitchell says that nothing unnerves him as much as Mayor LaGuardia urging everybody to let nothing disturb them. a The Wright brothers 38 years ago at Kitty Hawk first proved a heavier than a'r machine could fly and it is this department's guess that if the brothers cou'd have foreseen the future, they would have scrapped the thing before th try-out a a "Golf and Tennis Balls to Be Rationed." Headline. How can we make these all-out drives without them? a a a Bathing suits and rubber bathing caps are to be rationed, too, beginning begin-ning next month. This was the first news to arouse Ima Dodo to a realization reali-zation the country is really at war. a a a Yale has pledged its support of the country in the war. But a lot of football fans will put more faith in Harvard and Princeton. |