Show I m COl T TO I. I f HEARTS HEART'S HA YEN VEN 1 1 With ith BETTY BLAIR I Affairs of tho heart and nod kindred problems ONLY wilt wUl be bo discussed in Sa this department i Letters q questions and requests for nd should be addressed to MISS BETTY BLAIR HEARTS HEART'S HAVEN TELEGRAM SALT LAKE Write legibly upon only one side of or the paper It Is necessary ry that you ou append the right name and address but butth th these e will bo held In strict confidence confidence- and will by no means appear In print Ed Ed FEARS FOR FRIEND Dear Miss Blair Will wm you please help me with a aery avery very ery important problem My ly best bes friend one for tor whom I would d do anything met a 11 b boy bay y last year ear wh who fell ell 51 ht Thc for tor her at first sight They began going together and Dd in a D. short shor time were engaged She is b a wonderful girl full o or ol ambition and high Ideals She isn't isn radical nor one to always nhu's be harpIng harp harp harp- ing to a L fellow about his faults no nor does 1005 she expect him to o be perfect The he trouble is 15 that this certain ln fel- fel Jow low takes her too much for granted While hIle ho he respects her and I am sure thinks the world of her he makes dates and md them an any time he be herease pleases rease At this stage sL of the game ame he has also become careless about his personal per per- lional appearance and doesn't dress up Lip any more She doesn't expect him m to look loor like Uke a a Dim Gump millionaire mil ml- all the time but when hen the they theyo ro 10 o out In the evening he could at atea least ea t dr dress ss up She is exceptionally and it certainly cert embarrasses her herfor herfor for tor him to o act ut this wa way She cant can't help noticing his behavior and if a fellow had any sense he would know he had to look pretty well Wen and do his Ills best to keep up ap- ap for tor the whom he ex ex- ex to r ma marry Do yon think she can really care for him or docs does she just think she does Do you yon think I T J. J as a friend have any aDT right to Influence her to step out with Ith other fellows or to o try to keep her from getting married for tor a while I J surely would hate hao to think that hat I hid hd d Interfered if It she really cared for tor lm If they were to o break up under these conditions she would auld always blame me Please elease give giro me rue the adVice ad- ad Vice Ice that you rou think best uA ANXIOUS You will win yourself no thanks and andou you ou will lose your our friend in n the bargain If Je you interfere In her prIvate priVate private vate affairs Anxious Regardless of how much we may love lov our friends regardless of the fact that w know they are being duped for forus forus us It must be hands oft off And this thi js is s the reason Our friends arc age not the victims of the other fellow so much as they arc are the victims of their own lack of jud judgment ment To try to point the way for them unasked is isto isto isto to let Jet them know we have little or orno orno orno no confidence in their judgment and this brings their enmity Unasked for advice is like sowing thistles in the thc belief belle that the seed Is that of lilies If our friends suspect us of interference they will immedIately immediately imme imme- begin to show us that they can manage their own affairs and even though great harm come to them because of their own mistakes they would far rather suffer mistakes of their own doing than the anger at atthe atthe atthe the thought of a friends friend's meddling DO NOT MEDDLE is general advice advice advice ad ad- vice which if it heeded would not only help us to maintain our own self self-re re I but would help us to keep the friendship of at those whom we truly love The friend of whom you speak should realize that if her lance fiance has not lot self respect enough to keep himself himself himself him him- self well roomed for lor his own ap ap- ap th that i he will not do so for or any allY woman after he hc thinks he has won her She could quietly refuse to accompany ac- ac company him an any place in public when he came to her carelessly dressed If It he is careless about keeping ap ape ointments with her she should make maket impossible t for him to keep any appointments appointments ap ap- until h he is willing g to mend his ways The girl herself is the only oneS one to make the young man respect her b by the demands she makes upon him If Il no standards are arc set set none are broken so far as either she or he heare heare heare are concerned If It is possible for you ou to have your o our r girl friend meet other young oung men in your our home cas casually u all and I without meddling intentions it is possible pos- pos sible that the contrast between the standards you ou set for your ouI choice of fri friends and her own may impress her But she must be left to form her own conclusions free freely I and to tomake tomake make lake her demands according to her own wn plans Then whatever happens will be a matter of oC her own decision DUTY OF FRIEND Dc Dear r Miss nUS Blair There Is a D. boy who has been keep keep- lug n ng company with my best girl friend but ut he be wants to stop going with her herand herand and nd keep steady company compan with me lie le tells fells me that he is fa in love with me rue me and I know I am in love lo with him I have havo told old him that hat I cannot go with him because the girl he now non goes roes With is 15 my friend Ho He thinks I Iam Iam Im am m all nil wrong not to let him quit her herand herand and nd go 10 with mc me What would you advise mo me to o do Thanks l MERELY MARY Y MARY It io is ic the boys boy's affair and affair and your friends friend's if they two stop going to- to gether Let them decide that for tor themselves Tell the boy to consider you rou entirely out of the matter until ho he ic has taken time to reconsider Then if he wants to take steps to end things between himself and his present pres- pres cut ent nt girl he should do so without suggestion from you And should he do so give him to understand that he cannot annot immediately hope to take you ou out If It your our frie friend d is wounded because because be- be cause ause of the breaking creaking up of her com com- w with th this boy it would be beoo too oo cruel a blow for tor her to also have to o suffer your seeming lack of friendship friendship friend- friend ship hip in going with him I Give him time to think the matter say over ver say a month or so and so-and and give her time to again adjust herself beCore before be- be fore Core ore you ou step in into to the picture By that hat time who knows each of you may have other interests FrIendships Friendships FrIend FrIend- ships are arc too rare for us to needlessly need- need lessly hurt each other CLUB ENTERTAINMENT Dear Miss Blair I have c been cl elected president of a club lub of about 16 women tomen This club has bas been in existence for a a. number or of f years ears and seems seems run down for lack Jack of f new entertainment nave Have you ou any suggestions for tor serving and new entertainment en- en PRESIDENT Anything different from the kinds of f entertainment that have prevailed in n the past would be new for you But Jut you ou do not tell me mc what you have done one in the past nor the kind of or club you ou have Is it purely a social club Is s it a literary or sewing club For what purpose do you meet together and nd what havo have your plans been in inthe inthe the he past l If yours is a club that meets with no o other particular purpose than just justo to o assemble certain friends together then tien I advise that you map out a definite definite den den- nite nile program in accordance with your tastes Perhaps you ou would enjoy having book reviews from the book ot of f the month or from the outstandIng irig Ing ng productions of or a favorite author Maybe laybe music would interest you more nore and arid a study of ot opera of the basic themes and the stories told in each ach would be good entertainment Or Dr would you prefer to know something some- some thin thing hing definite about the worlds world's great painters an outline of the lives of each ach and prints of oC the great pictures they hey have painted The public library li library li- li has many books to aid in such studies One need only follow the food departments de- de of the women's magazines i to o have delectable refreshments suggested suggested sug- sug rested for each month The Helping the he Homemaker series that appear daily in The Telegram often have suggestions suggestions suggestions sug sug- for party refreshments S CANDLES FOR DECORATION Dear Miss Blair Will vIll you ou please give me rue a little Information about the uso use of candles candIes for or the dinner r table able Which is beter better better bet- bet ter er taste the pl plain wax colored tapers or colored candies candles Should they hey all nil allbe allo bo be o placed In holders bolder of or the same material ma- ma Need these holders all be the same lame height An Any other Information lon lion you have concerning their heir proper prop prop- er r use will be appreciated MATRON IA 1 TRON Wax colored tapers for the dinner table able are correct Colored candles for or the tea table may be used to carry carryout carryout out ut a definite color colot scheme The candlesticks candlesticks can can- may be of any material glass lass silver brass or china They should hould all be of ot the same material when used at a function but different differ- differ ent nt heights may be used at the same time The flame lame of tho candle must not ot come within the range of or vision visions as s it is hard on the eyes Candles are re not properly used for luncheons |