Show Your Baby j and Mine By MYRTLE l MEYER ELDRED ELDREE TIlE THE MOST EFFECTIVE DISCIPLINE DISC PLINE IS PAINLESS A brilliant young boy of 21 whose educational advantages have been beer exceptional made this astute observation S The discipline of a preparatory j tory school is good for a boy He ma may i hate the thc school but hell he'll never fee feel I t S the thc resentment or bitterness toward I it he would feel toward his paren parents S if they disciplined him Orderly ethical conduct or a routine rou tine is not resented by bv children Itis It 11 Itis is the punishment par parents use to enforce en force such conduct against which L children rebel We know mow from observation that iia if ii ifa ifa a child is spanked for some mischief he is not prevented from froni repeating that very act He is however prevented prevented prevented pre pre- vented from repeating it in the presence pres pres- I once ence of the speaker His emotion is isI I directed toward the thc not nol toI toward to to- to ward the thc thing for which he was pun pun- I There is no disagreement about th the thc fact that children need discipline but the thc modern parent wants discipline discipline pline that is effective in teaching what L she wants to teach She is through I with methods which teach the child to dislike and resent her and mIsbehave misbehave misbehave mis mIs- behave on the thc sly It is utterly silly for parents to say th that t when one advises against painful punishments one is therefore in fa favor lavor la- la vor var of perfect freedom of action forthe for forthe forthe the child Even adults do not have perfect freedom and certainly a child doesn't want it He doesn't know what he wants to do even if given the opportunity He wants direction and guidance In some cases he actually enjoys enjo's being taken by the hand marched out of the thc room and left in isolation when he misbehaves What he doesn't enjoy is feeling that his mother doesn't love him because of ot his mistakes Or that by her actions she shows she feels mean toward L him That is something else again a L punishment too severe for any childs child's infraction of rules What we are trying to teach a achild achild L child is that life in this world de demands demands demands de- de mands of us certain types of social j conduct obedience to certain rules of ol law and order We teach these things by carrying them out daily so that the child is inspired to respect the routine and also by setting up a daB daily example of similar conduct In our efforts to teach a child the thc multitude of or lessons he must learn we are in inclined inclined in- in dined to confuse him by our actions Our knowledge that he should go tobed to tobed tobed bed early seems enough for us but what the child feels is that parents get him to bed early so they can carryout carry carryout carryout out schemes of their own The mother knows that the childs child's good health depends unon upon his diet but when he fails to eat he readily arrives at th the conclusion that it is his mother who suffers by his failure to eat not himself him him- self The mother keeps putting herself herself her her- self into the heart of the thc situation L and making his conduct seem a personal personal per per- er- er affront to herself Disobedience is disrespect for necessary rules of ot conduct of which the mother is only the teacher and the interpreter CHILDREN RESENT T PUNISHMENT Children do not revolt against the clock which says Time to go to bed They do not revolt against the bell which warns them that meals arc are ready or against the thc whistle which tells them someone wants them or against the thc meal that disappears i if it they are not enjoying it Positive unemotional Unemotional unemotional un un- emotional carrying out of necessary routine arouses no resentment in the S child But painful punishments personally personally per per- administered teach a child i little except dislike and resentment toward the individual who administers adminis adminis- them I t |