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Show II r ' ' rThVic.c blessed is ho man who boosts not forsetttnp to walk to the right. Those Springfield rioters appear to be ; in a jrood way to be inndc to feel very I sorr3 . they did it. I So far as tho truth is concerned, (he. i I Dcserct News knows wherciu its own I, peculiar talent lies, i! Sonic men -waste more time huuting j' for trouble tbun they spend in looking ji fur lesi'imatc eniploymcnl. i .lohii W. Gates desires lo go to Con-I Con-I gross, 1)iit is not prepared lo "bet a V ; million that he will ge there. Mi : ' . It is rospeef fully suggested to Colonel Colo-nel Looj-c that he will never become Governor 1)3 ''waiting at the church." M.TJicro may bo some good in the polygamous po-lygamous prophets, but you would have to get out a search warrant to find il. p- XTd don't propose to forget to :in-. :in-. uouucg today that. Salt Luke is to have ji population of two hundred thousand in ninetcen-tcn. '' .Of course. Salt Lake couuty may be i considered doubtful this fall, but the ! only doubt is as to how big the Aincrj-f Aincrj-f can majority will be. ! Mr.' Spry and the remainder of the - Federal bunch may soou awaken to the i. fjffjt that 3Ir. Cutler knows how to do !; a little gumshoeing himself. : L'tali " Dem(T0rats" have opened their campaign, but prophet Joseph F. is in a position io remind thorn that they have only started something they can't I finish, i An inquirer -wants to know what is ! the salary ofa Mormon apostle; but we arc unable ro auswer, because we don't J know how uuich money ?i Mormon npos- tic "needs.' , He wants to return to Congress, ha j "says, to '-help revise the tariff." ; Winch" mcrcl' reminds the country at ' ..large that New York has a Sercno r j 1 Elisha ra3'iie. . ; ;? William Lush ul: Isiucoln, Nebrasku, i : -fired four shots at his wife because she I ' "didn't- talk enough. Which goes to! ,,show that Lush is the ungrateful and . i unappreciative thing. I j Scientists assert that no person liv-( liv-( ing has a perfect car; but most persons per-sons have a sufficiently perfect car lo j : 'feel annoyed, when listening to some jmii H ' ) ! ambitious ones who imagiue that they ; 'can sing. 'I'! T';iWc are told by his "Mouth'' that, "ft - iGceutb' Apostle Smoot wat a guest of Jy i Embassador Rcid at. London. Likewise I : "that several men of international re- 1 ?i j nown, a few mouarchs nnd )otcntalcs :h j wer "also" present. I i ', ' Jt' appears from "news" which the j . ; ' J! -Snioot "Mouth" prints from Preston, ' ; ! l' -Tdaho'c that up that- T-ay the saints are Ij'i.ij' running Roosevelt for President aud I j - ( Xaft for Vice-President. This beats the m'A : rdl, gag 'about the Pennsylvania Dutch !' - still voting for Gen. Jackson. V ( r 't 0,1 'find much improvement in our B ; , . finding,"";. said Apostlq George A. .Smith jl ; " ul Logau, ff Apostle llcber J, Grant I I f ' j : ' doesn't now beconio a bit ehcsly it will be because ho is impervious lo tho effects ef-fects of a high compliincut. |