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Show SMILES OF THE TIMES The elevator boy gets -at the end of his rope" as often as anybody. Farmer Jonks says, judging from the condition con-dition of his farm, that the men who try to stump New Hampshire this fall will have a tough time of it, by gosh. the'be after tou. They have buckled on the r armor, They are ruly for the fray; They Lave bought their railroad tickets. They h'lve struck the westward way. With oily tongue, with ready wit and fascinating smile, They n coming, friends of Zicn, so beware the villains1 smiles. They will spout on tariff hsirs, They will rant on silver lawn, They'll cover up with promises All the party platform flaws. They will buttonhole the pilgrim of every clime and station; They wilt tell you how their candidate can surely save the nation. They couldn't lie to save their souls, But, i rythe. make a note, That, despite this seeming friendship, The're looking for your vote. The professional lawn tennis player is compelled to court notoriety. A stock broker may mean well, but he is constantly trying to sell the public. Bints says lie can't sec why Iowa is a ''doubtful state." He never yet failed in getting a drink there when he asked for it. PREPARED FOR THE WORST. Jones "For goodness sake, man, where do you expect to go when you die?" New York Politician "Don't make any difference; I've been a member of Tammany for five years." The press dispatches state that a New York weekly paper has lost 1:300,000 through the dishonesty of a bookkeeper. Such being the case, It would be well to start an investigation inves-tigation to ascertain where the paper obtained ob-tained that amount of money. I |