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Show CRANDMA'S TRIBULATIONS- The VeasraMe Old lartv Strike a Snag and Look far aa Alternative. On account of a severe and cordial spanking administered by the pugnacious pugnac-ious Tat ou bit return from Chicago, Graudma Kelson, who, from the exalted exalt-ed position of managing editor of th morning Howler, watch or luuld watch it snarling, barking columns go to press, did not com 1 around o'night last month but sat sulking In sullen wroth iu her tent. Already are the flames of this lurid vindietivenea telling tell-ing on her damask cheek. Premature decrepitude is ungating the blush of rip old womitnhood aud some alarm U felt. Hut the wary Pat with his mercenary mer-cenary smile is hot. From day to day name have dropped from the page of the subscription, book like forest leave beneath autumual frost. Street le are but gaunt and emaciated reflection of the day before hi departure for the Columbian commission. The newsboy no longer light riotoutdy for the first batch tht is remitted from the cylinder cylind-er ofthi'pr'M. They are ttuek aud the public I gorged withone-half theorig'n-al theorig'n-al edition. P,t look over the devolution and rani, lie pronounce It alt tho result of dear grandma's stupidity and mlsman.'tgeuieut. A a m'sniaunear h is a geuiii. The "assisiaut editor," whose faculties are sharpened with religious re-ligious regularity each day by I lie printer' devil and the grindstone, have been allowed loo much latitude They have invailed, with unbridled seal, the column of Tiik Tntr,. and the original matter appear as a re hush In the col uinn of the great (linger of mud and Invective. "Throw awav the elrs," hrlek Pat, "and turn In 'I'll k Timf.s bodily. It will occasion ls delay. In the name of all that I holy, let u do something to slop the Inroad on the sulmcriptum book. No wonder the post olllee did not feel obligated to notify no-tify u of the change, In m ilt hour," The voluntary duats of polygamy wa a severe blow lo them. It leave grandma without a mission and an-iiareutly an-iiareutly without an alternative. It leave the concern In a dell of a fit. For Ihti almkey old plant no purchaser can be found not even a (ml, much lea a negotiation. It ateady decline ha left the chattel mortgage held tv Maekey wllh very feeble support, ft would be difficult for him to realise on them should he, aa ha threaten to do, foreclose nny day. The outlook I gloomy. The shining tljhts are threatened threat-ened with I'stltictlon. Pat bs a good trade, however, and Is Independent of tho tripod. lie can return to the meat axn and chopping block, to dining stake and slicing mutton chop for the rich and poor. Thrown In her liillriuiiT on the frigid oharllleg of the world, grand ma's fate would be problematical. problemati-cal. The outlook U luduud dark and threatening, mi 1 1 S S 111 1 1 inw ' |