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Show convention. If the attendance is and the proceedings harmonious, the result will be of great benefit to the county." . "Who do you think will be nominated for judge?" old John asked. "Neither of tho candidates that have been named. We have better timber than iiny of those fullers." "Well, said the major, yawning. "I reckon we hotter go to bed. so as to be in triiu for the- work to-morrow." "1 will show you the room," tho old man remarked, arising. The politicians were shown into an upper room, and the old man, placing a candle on the mantelpiece, bade them good-night and went down stairs. "What noiso was that?" tho major asked when the old man had quitted the room. "1 didn't hear any noiso," the colonel answered. . '1 did; it sounded like some one gasping gasp-ing for breath." He might have heard a noise might have heard old John struggling to suppress sup-press his laughter. j ".Suppose wo go to bed," said the major. "All right. You go ahead and I will blow out the candle." They talked for sometime before lying down; then, after a long silence, the colonel col-onel uttered a deep growL Tho major reached over and gave him a rake with the comb. "Wbat the deuce are you doing?" exclaimed ex-claimed the colonel, springing up in bed. "What do you moan?" And in his rage he began to grate his teeth. Tho major, supposing that he was getting get-ting ready to begin biting, reuched over and gave him another rake. "You infernal idiot!" yelled the colonel, colo-nel, feeling for the major's hair, "if I don't wool you I'm a shoto!" "What are you doing?" howled tbe major. "Let go, or I'll hurt you! Quit, I tell yon! Haven't you got any sense?" The major had found his hair. "I'll let you, know what it is to rake the life out of mo with a crosscut saw." "I was doing it to oblige you, you confounded wolf! Let go my hair!" "Oblige me! Do you take me for a saw log? Look out! If you hit me again I'll pull every hair out of your head!" They tumbled out on tho floor, rolled over and over, and then overturned a tottering old wardrobe that came down upon them with a crash. The major swore that he was dead, and the colonel yelled for a light, but no light came. Had they listened they might havo heard another noiso that sounded as if some one wore breathing hard. The old man was in the hall shaking tho railing of the stairway. Tho major was the first to scramble to his feet. "I will throw you out of this window!" he exclaimed. "And if I can find my pistol I'll shoot tho top of your head off!" howled the colonel. This threat bo frightened the major that ho gathered up his clothes as best ' he could and rushed from tho room. "Why, what's the matter?" the old man asked when the major came down. I "Nothing, only 1 am going away to got a cannon and then come back and blow that fool into eternity." "Did he try to bite you?" "Ho tried to kill me, that's what he tried to do." "Why didn't you rake him?" "I did rake him." "Humph!" grunted the old man; "he must have lost his peculiarity. What, you are not going out in such a night as this?" i "Yes, I am, for if I see that fool again I'll have to cut his throat. Uood-by." Shortly after the major left, the colonel came down. "Why, look hore," said ho; "I growled just as you told me , to do, and I wish 1 may die if that fellow I didn't come within one of ripping my j life out of me." "Mighty sorry to hear it. Ho must have changed since 1 know'd him so well." When the convention met next day the major and the colonel fought each , other so violently thnt neither of them i could win, and at an opportune time, old John Perdue stepped in and received ! the nomination. Opio t Read in New York World. COMBING THE COLONEL. There was a great political fermont in Simpson county, Ky., over the approaching approach-ing election of a county judge. The nominating convention was to meet on Saturday, and on Friday night two well known politicians caught in a rain storm stopped at the house of old John Perdue. The politicians, Maj. Bloodgood and CoL Noix, were sly candidates for the coveted position so s!y, in fact, that neither one knew of the schemes of tho other. After supper, while old John and his guests were sitting on the porch talking over the coming strugglo and listening to a wet katydid that held vesper services ser-vices in a locust tree, old John, getting up and stretching himself, said to the major: "Lot me see you a moment, please." Tho major followed him to the end of the gallery. "Major," old John whis-jiered, whis-jiered, "I am compelled to tell you something. some-thing. You gontlemon are welcome to stay with me as long as yon like, but ability to accommodate cannot always lie measured by willingness to do so. The truth is I haven't but one spare bed." "But can't the colonel and 1 sleep together?" to-gether?" the major rejoined. "Yes, you can, but the truth is he colonel is awfully peculiar." "How so?" "Well, as rational as ho appears while stirring about he's a strange man in bod. Our families, you know, are well acquainted, ac-quainted, and I therefore know all about him. Hispeculiarity comes from a scare he received when he was a child. It seems that a dog once tried to bite him, and now, just before he dozes off to sleep, ho begins to growl, and unless something is done to stop him ho begins to bite fearfully." 'Humph," the major grunted, "that's edd, but what can be done to stop him alter ho begins to growl?" "Well, his brother told me how he used to work it. He always took a coarse comb to bed with him and would rake the colonel with it when ho began to growl. As strange as it may seem, it was tho only thing that would quiet him. The family doctor said that a comb was somehow the ouly thing that would start the blood to circulating." "That's very odd. And would it quiet him?" "Would mako him act just like a lamb. Why, ho uster insist that his brother should take tho comb to bed with him. Ho don't liko to have any one mention the freakish misfortune, as he always terms it, but it would be doing him a great favor if you would tako the comb to bed with you and give him a l ake in case he should begin to growl. 1 4im telling you this because 1 am your i'riend, and because I know that you are good timber, ami especially because 1 hope that you may secruro his influence if you should ever desire any office. Don't you know that we always respect the man that understands our peculiarities peculiar-ities before we uro asked to explain them to him? lie i.i heusitive that way, and if he soos that you understand him he will then know that you have had your eye on him, havo held him in your mind." "All right. You got me the comb, and I will go through with the ceremony cere-mony when the time comes." "Here's one, put it in your pocket." Tlioy returned to the colonel, and after a while, when tho major stepped into the house to get a drink of water, the old man said: "You and the major are good friends, I RTO glad to Fee.". "Yes," replied the colonel, "I. think he is a first rate fellow." "Glad yon like him, for you and he will have to sleep together to-night, for the fact is I have only one spare bed." "That will be ull right I reckon," said the colonel. "Yes, but the truth is the major is the most peculiar fellow you ever saw." "In what way?" "As a bedfellow. I am very intimate with his family and know all about him. It seems that he had ft nervous trouble when he was a boy, and could not go to sleep until some one growled like a dog. I have known him to lie tossing in bed for hours at a lime, and then when I would go to his bed and growl ho would doze off like a lamb." . "I never before heard of an affliction o strange," said tho colonel. "I either, but then it is a very ensy matter to relieve him. He and a fellow named Buck Johnson were once opposing oppos-ing candidates for prosecuting attorney. Well, they had to sleep together one night. ' Buck knew of his peculiar affliction, afflic-tion, and shortly after they went to Hd Buck began to growl. The major didn't ay anything that night, but next day he withdrew from tho race, declaring that ho would not run against so good a man us Buck. "Yon don't say sol" exclaimed the colonel. "Yes I do, and know it to be a fact I would dvisu you to humor him in the lame way.'' t "I'll do so." . ' "Hush, he's coming back." "We are going to have more rain, I think," said the mjor, as he resumed his eat. "yes," the colonel responded, "but I fcuue that it will not interfere with the. |