Show SHYLOCK HOMES His Posthumous ous Memoirs Memo rs VII Mr Homos Tackles a Hard Cass Case CaseBY C SS BY JOHN JOHNJ BANGS e s c e c e c ef c a f A E WAS W I a ft long nt W M tC hw l wh N BE fiE bat but for foe the tile of aa and scythe cythe night t as y have MU for tor oU old Father Time A mot moment mo t before he be enter entered my trey once office there theft thereas was as a terrific crash wt not to t tte tr Md sad th the build ing Ine In shook u as though these then had Men few M u ea earthquake I t prang to my m fee f fegi aai to tbt doorway thor thoroughly thoroughly alarmed Flinging toe doer cloer wide open tiN the wl ened old gentleman covered with planter from fr the thel l ceiling c tUnc which wh had alien eI upon him plunged headlong II Into the MOM add upon open the floor with his hta head hd In Any 1117 basket The TIle of We his taU fall wa was a eb a as to send My cep tall clock off of Its Ita balance aad aM it toppled over cues on oa top et of till the old ott gen gentleman gentleman smashing p lu its fat face ba the Ute way say down epos my ray ink boule bottle anti and pattering the Contents content ta of that v over owr about B Ile to the ram mea myself Nor wua wag this the tile worst wont for on Oft top of all aU this rain raID about six tz square oare feet of my own ceiling Mke JIU that t of f the hallway bU was loosened and fell reu with a era over era overall nr all aU It was wu a wonderful transformation traut and ad It hap Up happened happened in the twinkling of an D eye where re only thirty seconds COnde before was waa the well ordered ered or systematically yate ar af arranged arranged ranged and scrupulously clean office oMo om of Say loch Homes the Ferret Perret was waa now a scene of t muddy deso desolation lation laton My Arst thought however boeyer was wag 1 for my m visitor who ho lay cursing curat underneath the clock dock I L feared he might be seriously hurt burt and hastened to his hIB assist ano ane n but fortunately barring a bruised dignity and a ruffled temper he was waa w none the tea worse oft off for his hie precipitate entry Walt a minute til I get my Death breath th he be panted as I dusted him bI off 0 and lid scraped the tI ink from his nose with my eraser Uh end Ill ID tut tell you yon huh who I am amo amoTh There Th is I no lie need said aid I gating gasing about me upon pea the th ruin rul his hla coming co had bad wrought I perceive from the plaster on your neck n and waste basket on Oft your head bf ad and the th demoralisation that has ba overtaken my office since In e your arrival that you are none other than that Prince of Hoodoos George W Jonah Esq z Captain Cap Captain Captain tain of the Whale and Harbinger of I 1 thought tho ht at brat ant you might be Job but bat when hen I 1 hoard heard the language you used when be the U clock fell fen on you which I assure are you is ill not DOt nt fit to print I knew at once that von vou were ere not DOt he but bat yourself Whit Whal can an I do dotor for tor you Jea d May I sit down for tor fora a moment he acted You can if U pay 1 for tor the tM chair said I 1 for t 1 perceived Pf very clearly what would happen hap if I yielded ed to his lUa request There is 18 no DO known mon chair bench bAck be e set net nettee settee t tte tee te or divan made of iron steel or solid oak 0 that ut would be sale safe with him on it nay not DOt even ven if its Ita seat gnat were of ot armor plate and its Ita legs of the tM squat oat thick thickness thickness ness Deu of ot a grand PAd pianos Perhaps wed better go out in ba the park Wk and talk he bf suggested Some place where nothing eon ena foil fan on an onus anus us it might be safer ater aterNo No said r Po were better oft off here be Weve ready already a had all aU that can one be coming to us In to the way of f trouble unless of ot course co the house bouse falls faU tal What can an canI anI ca caI I do for of yep yea Have you scon esea thug this he lie asked taking a t newspaper news newspaper paper clipping from the folds of ot his JIll garment and d handing banding it over OYer U It is a statement made by Baron in Ms his Further Recollections now DOW pas puh to tit the t te Column Guette that Ito I aw en as old fraud and that he himself in a previous state of ex ett existence was wu Jonah What is Ie more he fg foreshadows the Autobiography of Jonah a work upon which wbk k I Iam Iam Iam am myself engaged and hope to have finished i in time daM for t the net neat holiday season uan He not lOt only libels me by calling yes me an ala old fraud but actually proposes to take aU ke kethe the bread bead out of my mouth by bJ writing a profitable le work which no one bat but myself is Ie entitled to write I glanced over the article complained co of which read an as Now No as u to Jonah I really dislike very ver much mach to tot tread t upon this toes and I should not net do it had bad he not chosen to clap an aD injunction upon a vol volume volume 01 ume e of Tales Tabu 1 of the Whales which I wrote for tor chil claU children children dren last summer claiming claim that I was wu infringing iD up upon upon on his bIB copyright and ud feeling teU that I J as a jug ing man would never claim the discredit dl of having myself been bee the person he b claims to have bare been I 1 will candidly confess colli that I am not proud of my JIlT achievements as Jonah I was waa a very oily person be before before before fore I embarked upon apon the seas as Lord High Ad Admiral miral of H M S 8 Leviathan I was wu not a pleasant pl p Tent t tn person n to know If It I spent the night with a friend Ji his de roof would fall in or his house bouse ho would burn bran down downIf If I bet on a horse hone he would lead up to s the home homestretch be me stretch and d fan fail down wn dead an as inch 1 ch troll from the If It I went into bito a stock speculation I was wu J caught on a rising rI or falling market In IJa my youth oath I spoiled polled every yachting party I went ent on by attract attracting lug ing a gale pie When I came eam out the moon moo west went t behind a cloud and d people who began be by br b endorsing ell my pa paper paper per ended up in the poor house ity gave n ale up Commerce have me Boards of trade every ry everywhere where repudiated me and I gradually sank aak Into that state of despair which finds b no solace anywhere here but buton butOS buton on OS the sea or In la politics and as u politics was wag u then unknown aown I went to sea The be result Is WD wa to the tM world 14 I was Wu cast overboard n and lid lap fry a whale which in his hie defense let me m be generous genero enough to tomy say my 7 swallowed me DIe inadvertently and with the us usual sal ual result I came back and aDd life ute went et on 0 Finally I came here and Dd when w n it got pt to the ears era of the author auth authorities r rIU IU It as that tt I was w hi in Hades Hade they sent me back hack for the fourth time on earth in the th person ef of W Shakespeare ak Thus This is 18 the whole of ef the Jonah story eiery It is 18 a sad story stop and I regret t it and I am sorry for tor the impostor Imposter tor ter now posing as u Jonah when whee I reflect that the ebar character acter he assumed possesses poe attractions for him His JI real ral life must have hae been a fearful thing W he 1 Is 18 Isy laUD happy y in ta his lata impersonation and for tor his punishment t lot let letI vs leave ve him aim where when he is IL Having HaY told tot tol the tile truth t th I have done my IQ duty I cheerfully resign my claim to the personality he claims I relinquish rell from this time Uwe on Oft all aU right title and aDd interest in the name hot bat if It he ever dares to Interfere with me again In In Inthe Inbe inthe the be use We of my personal recollections concerning concemi the inside of whales w I shall elI hale bale him before the author Wee Itten Well said mid I as I I finished lebed reading Mi a strange narrative I I dont see Me what I have to do d with a case calle like this thle Im not an attorney but a de detective detective What you need used to is a lawyer la There a lawyer In all JI Hades that will take the case c U said d Jonah I went to and ani be besought bet besought sought t him to see that tbt th I got lOt Justice and Ad Just tt be because because cause ca the moment I entered his As ottee oMee a M ten ibis over on us both and un knocked him senseless for a minute he had me flied fired out s a clever sin man said L i I But t be he the whole boIe bar Why dont you u go ao to Edmund Burke Barke BarkeI I did sighed Jonah and with the tIM same result At t he h said hed take the ease eue but lust Jut then some come rotten besets beams in his office floor gave pv way 1 and lid we tell Soft through three stories into the cellar ee Bark BarR myself his office and everybody in it When ho lie came to he hf said be he had reconsidered recon and think that tat a libel Ubel suit t tor for a plaintiff plain tift of my peculiar sort was quite in his line ne neIt It was with Ith difficulty that I restrained my aI desire to laugh Ia The only thing thine that titled sated me from fro seem seeming ing 1st 1 to mock at the tJI poor chaps bap misfortunes I J fear fr was my own apprehension of what might happen hap to toelt myself elt if I laughed as heartily as am I 1 should shoal have done I surely did not wish my II own on floor door to give way ay and I avoided any ebullition whatsoever that might bring brin further trouble upon us WI Have you yon tried Cataline I asked referring to the great peat Roman who in criminal practice practise to is do doIng lag Ing the most moat successful law business in I hides Hade Oh Lord groaned Jonah When I think th of Cat Cataline Catalin aline Un it makes me weary Of Ot course coune I tried him and he be actually took the case ce and we got ot it started all allright right But the tb moment I entered entend the court room scorn the theOD asides on OD the tIN statue of ot justice back of ot Lord Jef Jeffreys freys chair fell feU off oft and whacked w ked his hIa honor boD so vig vigorously on OD the tIM pate that he h come to for four tour hours boa and the Ute that first thing thine he did on regaining rec con cen consciousness was wa to commit t me mf for contempt eS f court What had you JOU to do with it besides buld being your yourself yourself self It I demanded Nothing Jonah JObah answered It wa wan aa sheer negligence neg negligence on 0 the tM part of the court officials that caused carved it IL They ought to have seen Men to U t that the scales calM were securely fastened But the lodge judge me Ins guilty tI ty of contributory negligence ence and aDd I 1 had hd to stay Fn I a jaa until tit his hie honors head bead healed b up You Toe have luck to burn bWl you JOUr I 1 Wt Id od sympathetically Yes Yea y he sighed Shed but bat It seems to be If f It wenel see He a lot tot of lit it go up uD m h em moe uy I still dont see bow how I can help you yon Mr Jonah I put in J after a pause pa I have hav no influence with the courts and ad am not DOt in any a lawyer What you pou u really rean ought oh to do 0 it t seems secrets to me to Ie to have a trustee appointed for tor yourself 1 get a guardian gu or pos sibly go SO into the heMp hands of 01 a receiver sad and have Mft this thU person institute a suit on en your behalf For rw myself you yott will pardon my saying it you are a veritable and aad I can testify from personal experience ex here I waved waned nd my m hand over the tile wreck of my tutee once O ee peaceful otAte that it is II practically impossible I ble for tor you In propria persona peno to leave a pleasant Impression Impression sion aIon behind you but if It you make mab an assignment ment of your ur r interests to a second party It may be that he hean can an help you out outI I r tried it said Jonah mournfully But it work I got lOt Samson to look I after my affairs wont west into toto the hands haade of a receiver as you OU have uve sug suggested 1 suggested p and well it was WI the tame same me old story On OA his lat latway way to court to qualify quality he was run 1 over by b a trolley troll Icy ley l car and ancI the automobile ambulance that cams came to take him to the t hospital blew up just Jut after atter hed been Men put nut aboard and smashed the ue few ribs rib rU he be had left when Ilea the trolley car ear had bad gotten otten through with him atm Then rima Ms fads partner Demosthenes took my case elite up upa and aad a while he was wag dictating the complaint he awai al lowed one OM of the pebbles pebble he be heaps hasps la fa his ate mouth month to overcome stammering It lodged la III his vermiform Itana appendix and he had to be operated on within three hours hour He wont be out again acain for liz sig weeks week aad and meanwhile this thi beastly libel is 1 going the tile rounds round un u contradicted Why dont dot some ome of your our friend elands come to the front and set Bet you straight Ha at you any aay neighbor in Nineveh who can testify for fer you yoa and aDd thus thu th con confound confound found old Munchausen 1 I asked eel for I wa WI torn tom by conflicting emotions emotion i was awfully tully a sorry for the tM old gentleman whose hOle luck had MIa been ao so laud hard a as to be de described scribed only by the Ute adjective hut but on OR ORthe the other hand baneS I had bad myself to ao consider and aad when w wI I thought of the woes woe that had come Cose apse um Blaek stone ato Jeffrey Jeffreys Samson Sameon and aed Demosthenes for hav having having ing ine undertaken n to champion JODIa cause ea I was w ex extremely extremely extremely loath Joath to put my own neck aeck In I the same miss noose I wanted to get t free tree of ot him with the tM mere of ot advice and I racked my brain to tie and bd some semblance sem semblance blance of ot a reasonable scheme echeme to send him aim forth tol tolerably tolerably tolerably content with my good will Bat It was w without avail The suggestion merely elicited the tact fact of a amore more unhappy condition that I had bad surmised They Th y actually refuse etu to have anything to do with me he said Ald sadly Badly There one of ot em will consent con COD consent sent eat to come within a mile of ot me If It he can caa help bel It You Ton see eee they remember the old days dan when t Dee anee with me was enough enouch to send a man maa Into bank matey y I 1 dont know why it Is ill Mr Home but bat Fm Im r the antipodes of that old Jackass Midas He t know Do a blessed thing but everything he be teach to turns turn to gold I Iwen well everything every J I I touch turns into IAto Attleboro jewelry in a minute I frankly believe that if it I had bad the diamond in ta my ay ayn possession n for tor five eve minutes minute it would turn tarn out oat to be bet t nothing more mere than a poor quality of rhinestone be before beI I fore fn ore it t left eft my possession Ion My neighbors ors of Nineveh No N indeed Mr Homes Home theres therb no JIG relief r there As s a matter of fact tact Job himself who is 1 casehardened when It ij tomes comes to suffering and anel who loves love m me line like a brother absolutely refuses ret to lift JIll Iris nager isager to help me oat out My If l soul was ared by all this thill misery J F forgot the despoilment of et my papers paper and the destruction of my clock and d sent nt him away way a with a promise IOa of help It was the Ule hardest pt jia lest task I had ever e undertaken n for tor there seemed no DO way out of the situation Silence on en J Dh part In the public eye eJe appeared to con COD confirm Confirm firm the truth of Muncha words but bu BOW how could ke he speak eak with the tit ordinary ordinal of or redress bawd barred The lawyer lawyers were out of It and after the Jeffrey accident even the courts court were morally if It not DOt physically call elated closed to him His friends friend refused to speak k |