Show 1 A Of ff TUB IRISH ON Tt WITNESS SI STAND AND Chicago higo i iA A witness wine In one o of our courts court seats sea himself comfortably writes writ John De DeMoran DeMorn DeMoran Moran Morn In lp the the Green Gren Bag Bag Crosse crosses his hisle j legs le makes make himself hh self at home hom and in n J 1 some instances leans lens 7 is jover oer 0 er and nd tries tie to j chat confidentially with wih the Ue judge In n 1 England the witness s stands in a box boxlike boxlike like an pulpit while in Ireland the witness stands literally on ona ona wine ler lY j ja a table in front and beneath the bench He is denied the privilege of o j leaning on the front of the box like late lening his English EngUs brother but has ha to stand j often arum feeling fe ng most mot uncomfortable mak making making making ing an exhibition of himself for the amusement of the people of the court Sometimes the court co rt is indulgent and anti allows him to be seated but that woo was wasso alow so rare in the days da s when I frequented Irish s courts curt that ht when granted the witness was sure to be looked upon wines being too friendly with wih suspicion as frendly with wih the court court The Irish witness wines especially when belonging to th the peasant class cla is often a trial to t the counsel for not only only is he quick at repartee but his answers are often oten confusing by their quaintness and anti whimsicality In the th bankruptcy court I once heard hearda a witness asked the amount of his a aske gross Income i iMe Me gross g tj income is it i Sure an Id Id l have have ye gf know that Ive Ive no gross in income income income come Im a fisherman an me mc income Is alt all al net net Im was a the astonishing reply These witnesses are often confused Thes the misunderstanding of words I th and and phrases and as a consequence many nany an a laugh cannot be suppressed I even by the most strict tipstaff He called caled me out of me name said saida a witness wines in a case ce of assault by a aman aman aman man on a woman The justice trying to t preserve p ve the relevancy of the wit witness wi ness mess nes testimony said eaid sid good wo woman W woman a j civil action my goo man manThe manThe Jn The witness eyes flashed fire fre as she looked looked loke up at the justice Sure Sure thin if ye call can that a civil civi ac action tion its is a bad ye must m t be beYerl 1 I 1 once oc heard a clerk cler ask osk k a witness to take the Ue Bible in right hand The witness that h would not do doso dos doso so s and continued e to hold out the left let Then Th the court curt thundered out Take the book bok In your right hand hands sir s Begora if it ye say so Ill 11 do It but I Fm rm Beor not responsible for what L do What do lo you mean ujean nean Musha its Is I am an a I me cant nt be depended on at all al allt at t all al The fhe witness evidently thought that his hs physical Incapacity Inc would affect th t the value vau of his testimony t if i he used I the right hand for holding the book bookIn bookIn bookIn In a ease case cs of assault on a wife by byI her husband u band the counsel for the com corn complainant complainant I t after ater she had been ben sworn asked ake most Insinuatingly and with wih a aI alok alook I I look lok at a the justice which was Wt intend ed to create sympathy j I I e I And now ow Mrs Irs Sullivan UlvAn will wi you kindly tell tel the court curt whether your hus husband J band bald was in the habit of striking you with Impunity The counsel looked again at the th jus justice ju Lice tice while hie awaiting the reply With Wih what sor sr With impunity Faix he did nor sor now and thin but buthe buthe he be a tuck me Sl more often ofen with Wih his fht The T 4 aJ was was compelled to smile smie but pt ul to the occasion for forbe ha be f curn It asked aked And that tat hurt you ou more mor 1 it l i did sor wits was w s the reply When the te great sr OConnell roused the theire thein theire ire in of a a fishwife geat by by calling her a paral parl parallelogram t the world laughed but only i a a few months mont ago ao a a a woman asked aske for fer a abusI using warrant against a man nan for tor j I live lye Ive language in the t e street What did 1 He HeI he h say asked ako the magistrate wint forent the whole world at the I corner corner of Capel street tret an called me he did yer an en communicated gameter In the trial at the Galway assizes a awine witness wine one oe Patrick Flanagan was a great friend of the accused and gave his evidence very reluctantly He was thick in his utterances and and added to his hi obvious dislike to testifying he la Ia labored labored bored under the physical difficulty o of having lost several of his front teeth in Ina ina a recent fight Several times he was asked aked to repeat his answers answer and he got excited excie Then rhen the use of long words by the counsel coun l added to his nervousness and nd he answered very in incoherently incoherently coherently Dont prevaricate sir shouted the te judge angrily cate is it i exclaimed the witness wIness Im Tm I me tue lord Its U be able to help if three or four of yer lordships teeth wor knocked out of yer head hed Not guilty lord but the gity me jury advises the prisoner not to do it it again agai a awas was the verdict In a case cae tried in Tip Tipperary Tipperary Tipperary and this has ha its it counterpart in inthe inthe inthe the verdict of a Galway Gal ray jury My lord we find the man who stole the horse not guilty I can you swear that the hens found in this mans yard belonged to you asked a lawyer of ora a witness who appeared appere against an alleged chicken thief in Waterford By y the kind sor I Why that is absurd abr I have some like I them myself Quick as U a flash fab of or lightning the witness replied Very likely sor Sl I lost los some a bit before blore this man took thim this In a northern court court an old woman was exceedingly garrulous and and insisted in telling the court curt what she would do if she were on the bench The judge at last lat exclaimed And old woman is not fit ft for the bench Sure your lordship ought to know from fr m experience ence was cas wa the retort retort which convulsed the bar for the judge jude in question queston had earned eared the sobriquet of or old woman In Ireland the peasantry still sti use the word killed kie in Its it original sense con conveying conveYing conveying the idea of serious injury rather rather than death Thus the frequenters frequenter of Irish courts court will wi often hear a witness swear in assault cases that he cs was kilt kit An amusing Instance I in which the word was used in that use sense appears appear in a report of a case re recently recently tried in Sligo An old man who had been ben assaulted asalle was being examined I by a young and inexperienced barrister who was wa conducting the prosecution I And were you stunned when you ou were knocked down he asked Was Wa I II I what wh t yer honor asked the witness Stunned repeated the barrister aShure I dont know what mane sor sr Were Vere you rendered insensible Shore Shura insensible at all al at atall atal atall all al the witness wine asked his is face show showing ling I ing clearly clealy that he was wa perplexed Im Im ImI ImI I afraid I cannot cannot get gt any good goo of this I stupid witness wine my lord said sid the te coun cun j I sol Let me try tr him said sid the judge I j Come my good go man inns m n did they kill ki you i now The face la of the th witness bright brightened ened cued up and anti he exclaimed Faix that j I they did me lord lordI I I In a petty sessions sons court a 8 man wasI was I I sued for the nonpayment of his rent rentI I j In his hi defense defens he maintained that the place was WS so s small smal that tat it I was S not worth the rent demanded Why w j yer honner he exclaimed the room rom Is so small that tat a donkey donke turn turnaround turnaround turnaround around honner In it 1 just come and try tr it i yer The witnesses have no intention of being disrespectful but their simplic simplicity Ily I ity shrewdness and brightness mingle together and ad cause the whimsicalities to which I have r r rI I was wras v making p toUr of Ireland in maing the te latter laU days of et the Fenian henlan movement and many curious incidents came under my observation oberton showing how zealous the Ue he royal ryal Irish constabulary constabulary Ilary lary was wu In arresting strangers and charging them secretly with At that time the habeas corpus corus act was wt repealed and anyone arrested could be kept in prison without trial I j for a a period of or two to years When a aman aj aman j man was wa tried he felt that he was Wa to face a partisan judge ju ge and a packed ace jury ury I am not going oin to nalo a the t e J ot tOp charge tha that juries Goin were always will wUl fully unpacked packed but I know koW that many a j I jury jury ury was afraid to give an an accused accused the tha thebe jUr the Hb I doubt because be cause benefit be of O f any erty of each member of that tat jury jurY was imperiled I remember reading of one Instance where the accused was so well wel tf eed wa of the jury that h he with the personnel jut I Idid did not challenge any anyone one but tw counsel ered that it i was w e I he replied The jurys jurs all aU r right right but r bike to challenge the jude judge i iThe IThe The witnesses were also afraid arram to tea tes testify te too strongly in favor of the te defend defendant did they might be trea treated d da an ant to for if i they ant treated in Cork a as I heard hear ear a a witness wines i Judge Keogh who had been ben a nationalist accused of be betraying at one time but was his m fellow nationalists listened toa to a witness who told a very ver straightforward ward story and ad then advised the te chief war of nolice stOr to look into the character of ofte the e witness as it i was likely he was w a f te Fenian wines Of course the witness wines was w ar arrested rested There Thore was a very good story being re retold retold retold a ver told but which Is actually a true tue story of these th days days A judge was trying tring a case where the accused could understand only only the Celtic I tee r had to ti i b l lo S r was W a it wish was s to do justko a gO f h C w had leanings toward the but bt d tW hl h Sl de Th The accused man m n we nl 0 ert conversation with wih i the Wal hl n that worthy did not r te to the te court crt At last ht r the ther know J ed to what had e Nothing my r lord I l d 11 unblushing rey rey s ti h i Hew ew dare iare t fare you sa My a heard hd you talking h to 1 n what was 8 i It 1 h ia 1 s I My lord I It bad d Olt e to do f rou cu do not tell 1 I 11 you for tel J What he I d he My sayi Conte t 55 f L Wel Well ny my lord he sid said hos that e t ta 1 bed curtains old aid rt b I up there round r 1 lery one in court conn t i tipstaff did not for a hed a asp stop the sp unseemly condi i In his red wiS Tl I robes 1 re f and aini White i until nUI his face fa w was a 11 brighter 11 t Ir v vAnd robes rob asked Iske th tha II j h t And 0 what dd d d you vou ou sav 1 r I I I said sid Whist je p sy 11 I the oU boy thaUs gem i to I |