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Show THE DELICHTS OF BASE BALL. The only son of a widowed mother is a member of an amateur base hall club. On Saturday ho had his hair cut and oiled, and accoutred himself for the fray, and his fond mother tied one of her beat lace-trimmed handkerchiefs hand-kerchiefs round hie throat, and put a clean handkerchief, with some cologne on it, in his belt, and kissed him, and he went. About 7:15 he returned. That is, the most ol him and the lollowing conversation ensued: "My son, where is the lace handkerchief hand-kerchief you had round your neck?" "Here, ma, tied round this finger. I picked up a daisey cutter. I think fiugor iB only out ol joint not broken." , "My son, why do you not speak plainer, surely, surely you have not been drinking?" "No, ma, but in the latter half of the seventh inning our catcher's haode gave out; and I went behind, and I stopped a foul tip with my teeth, that is all." "Mv son. vour nice new uniform is all blooded in front. Whatever can you have been doing?" "Nothing, ma, only I was trying to scoop in a high one at third, and muffed it, and the ball came on my nose, but I put it over to first and got him out." "My son, your white flannel psnts are all green behind." "That, ma, was in the third inning, when I tried to steal the second, and had to throw myBelf down and slide is. I got the base anyhow, and came in on a two-baser to left field." "Alas, my son, I fear that you have had an unpleasant day. Let me send for Burgeon and a dentist, and get some arnica, ico water, lint, raw beefsteak, Bplints, sticking plaster, vinegar and brown paper, Radway's Ready Relief, Perry Davis' pain killer, compresses, slings, leeches, clean clothes, opodeldoc, horse liniment, and in a few days you will not know yourself." I ever was in ten inninga, and the score 7 to G. If I die I give my bat to Billy Humphreys and my spiked shoes to Carley Groa." Exit, led out by his ma. Curtain falls. |