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Show COOD MANNERS. Good manners bear eometliiug til the eamo relation to character tlmt tbe flower does to the plant; though not necengary te its existence, it in needful to its development ai.u" beauty; aud thougli not ilsflf c 1' tougb and eoduriDg texture, it yet gives evidence of the strength of root and vigcr of stem which gave it birth-It birth-It is a popular notion tint mnnucrrf are something only on the surface, some Lb mg that, like dreoB, can be put on or taken of I at pleasure, with out affecting What ia underneath, i But thiti in nut so. They are not a garment, wholly distinct from tbe nature, covering and prrlrnps hiding it, hut are rather tbemselv a its owo surfice, like tbe delicate ekin which, by its bloom, Bpeaks cf youth and happiness, or, by its pallor and wrinkles, tills of sicknesb, sorrow or age. Thus, the finest mannerB, those which all instinctively admire and respect, are the natural ollapring ol dignity, self possession, gentleuuad, benevolence, sympathy and tender ne.-a. They presuppose a certain force of character and firmness ol purpose which invest tba owner with composure and self respect, and Bufle-r bim not to be driven about by circumstances, flurried and disturbed by trifle, or abashed by ih presence of others. On the other hand, they aiBO betukeu a gentle epiriv, a kindly heart nnd a broad sympathy. No one can simulate sim-ulate the manners which naturally spring from these characteristics any more than tbey can bring fresh aud living dowers from a decaying plant, or place the ruddy hloom of young and healthful Jile upon a frame racked by disease or enfeebled by the weight of yeprs. No set of artificial rules, however elaborate, no code of social etiquette, however strict, can ever produce that true courtesy which, at once dignified and afiable, is the natural and unstudied expresjion of a character that la both self-respecting and sympathetic. Can we net then, mend our manners man-ners if they are faulty? Cd not politeness pol-iteness be learned as an art? May not a gentle and courteous demeanor bt acquired? Or must we be content con-tent to let the nature, whatever it be, express itself as it lists, and ho 1st rudeness flourish uocbecked, because it is tbe language of a hard heart or a coarse mind? Certainly duplicity can no more succeed in manners than in anything else,- and the man or woman who strives to bide a selfish sel-fish soul under a bland and spacious spa-cious exterior, will soon find tbe task an impossible one. Xet culture cul-ture canido much in this regard without sacrificing truth. There are germs of sympathy and good-will in every braaat wkioh aood oLivrieliiug and developing into sturdy plants, and a chief means of doing this ib to regulate the conduct in unison with them. Thus when we perform tbe kindnesses and amenities ef life, and even the lesser acts of suavity and politeness, ws insensibly quicken our own good feeling and nourish the benevolent impulses within us, while they, in turn, by their activity, react again to produce acts of gentleness '. and love. Habit is rightly called second nature, and those who habitu-ate habitu-ate themselves to treat the;r fellow- men with civility and kindness, to " show deference to age and wisdom, ; to practice continually small self-sacrifices self-sacrifices lor the benefit of others, ; will soon find their own hearts be- J coming softer and their spirits sweeter , under tbe influence. In all this there is nothing deceitful, nothing artificial; it i& only the true culture which must be applied to every fac- ' ulty to enable it to grow to its full ' proportions. J 2No better teat can be applied to manners to distinguish tbe good from the bad than tbeir efieots in helping or hindering fellowship. Good man- J ners always facilitate social inter- 1 course, Bet people at oaae, induce them to forget what is awkward or ' disagreeable, and draw them nearer 4 to each other in thought and feeling. J This is effected by no studied rules or ! diplomatic art, but only by a keen ; perception of what is agreeable and a ready effort to promote it, even at tho i cost of some personal inconvenience. . Even this acute perceptiou, though . sometimes a natural gift, may be cultivated and increased. By extending extend-ing our sympathies and observing closely the preferences of those with whom we mingle, we may sharpen our powers of insight, and learn how to give pleasure gracefully and easily. I If to this perceptive faculty we add a liberal share of what is commonly known as good nature that is, a i hearty, cheerful and generous desire for others' happiness, and a corresponding corres-ponding effort to promote it, we Bhall need no formal rules of etiquette to teach us how to be kind, courteous and polite. Good sense, good character char-acter and good will naturally express i themselves in good mannerB, and he who would possess the flower in its delicacy and sweetness muat cultivate the root in all its strength and enercv Philadelphia Ledger. |
